Don't be fooled by the reviews claiming this is an artsy giallo. This is a surreal and extremely tactile movie about female sexuality and senses, with no exploitation, by
way of an homage to classic Italian horror. The movie is a sequence of dialogue-free shorts that bring a woman's various experiences to life through meticulous audio-visual
craftmanship, taking Italian horror cinematography techniques from Bava and Argento to delirious and surreal heights. The first part is the most surreal and features a young
girl's confusing and frightening first glimpses into the world of adults, full of strange behaviour, death and sex. A veiled hand haunts her, she steals an old pocket-watch
from a long dead grandfather which threatens with incoherent nightmarish scares every time it is opened, letting in unavoidable puberty. She also witnesses her parents having
sex, a mind-shattering mix of sensuality and violence. Then there is her walk with her mother to town as she is freshly aware of her teenage new body and sensuality and men's
stares, with close-up scenes that create sensual tension so thick, you could drown in it. And she does drown in it later in a bath full of sensual pleasures and scary hovering
men, she also finds herself extremely vulnerable in a simple taxi drive full of scorching heat, which leads to the final dream-logic giallo chase and bloody murder scenes which
seem out of place at first, but can also be read as a way of depicting the scary, erotic and violent presence of men. Watch this one with your skin, not your eyes. Just keep
in mind it may be an unpleasant experience for some.
The nightmarish world of Oscar the entomologist, involving his various fears of, and relationships with, women, intertwined with his love for insects, especially
the metamorphosing and predatory kind. In this dark dream-world which is constantly drowned in darkness of a solar eclipse punctuated by brief flashes of
blinding sunlight, everything is spliced together and nothing makes sense. There's his sister from childhood memories who may or may not have been killed
in a hunting accident, by a wolf, or in some other unknown fashion. There's his mother who may have been black... was his sister black as well? A sick, black,
pregnant woman appears in his bed to whom he may have made love, hunted by the spectre of his sister, and turning into a cocoon, then into a beautiful woman
with a deadly insect-like weapon. A predatory schoolgirl seduces then bites him. Other elements include his work at a museum collecting insects, creepy twins,
and a shrink that inspects his mind and dreams through a funnel and electric apparatus. Visually stunning and thoroughly atmospheric, a near-masterpiece of
Lynchian cinema, but for some reason there is a slight element of unsatisfaction. Perhaps it's because the movie refuses to divulge even a nugget of fact,
obfuscating every detail until the every end. Nevertheless, it's a must-see, visually rich, dream-like, psychological mystery.
An obscure surreal gem in which we are led into a paranoid, mad, nightmare world that keeps blurring the line between dream-like brain processes and reality.
The story is loosely about a discovery of advanced personality-sculpturing brain surgery, a company that wants to market it to the public, and a surgeon
who is being manipulated. But the movie is like one of those never-ending nightmares where you jump from one level to another only to keep finding that you
are still dreaming.
Mental problems are treated with a sci-fi machine that allows one to enter the patient's mind and interact with him there. Things turn very dark and twisted
when the therapist is asked to enter the mind of a demented killer in order to save his victim. Disturbing surreal imagery, repulsive sadism and bizarre
necrophilia fill this visually rich but nightmarish experience.
A breathtaking cinematic masterpiece. Using timeless, steampunk, Brazil-esque art and production-values, this tells a dark fairy-tale about an inventor
that clones himself and creates other beings in order to have friends. One of them bewails the fact that he has no soul and doesn't dream, and therefore
tries to steal children's dreams. When he kidnaps a muscle-man's adopted kid-brother however, they start a sequence of events that may lead to their
downfall. Characters include thieving children that behave like adults, witch-like siamese twins attached to each other in more ways than one, and a
cult of men that blind and attach themselves to machines in order to see better. Included are many more unforgettable visuals and a magically
bizarre atmosphere from a fascinating imagination. This is one to watch many dozens of times.
City of Lost Children
A collaborative short cartoon conceived and drawn by Dali and Walt Disney in the 50s and completed 50 years later. A Disney-esque
woman dances in a surreal dream on themes of love, time and loss with pure Dali imagery: Ants crawl out of a hand only this time
they transform into a swarm of cyclists on dunes, a woman wears the shadow of a bell, turns into dandelion seeds, which turn into
fairies, with a melting wristwatch and the sands of time ticking on, etc. Beautiful but short.
The masterpiece I always hoped Lynch would create. Mixing bizarre elements into a gripping and complex tale of time-travel, this one doesn't get lost in
twisted creativity but magically ties it all together with a carefully layered and clever plot. Donnie is a troubled youth who seems at first to be just
another teenager out of touch with reality. An evil rabbit tells him to commit violence and that the world will end, he discusses theoretical physics with
a teacher and smurf sex with his friends, has anger issues with hypocrisy and idiocy, and his hallucinations at first get worse until some scary,
otherworldy logic starts to tie it all together...
A masterpiece of surrealism presenting a character study and artsy meditations through dream-logic. A man's past, existentialist ruminations and
relationships with his parents and women are explored in exquisite surrealism and incredibly detailed and odd sets. He visits his sick father
in a dilapidated mansion with tombstones blocking the door, where they treat him using time-travel. He wanders between his bitter mother and eccentric
father, his orthodox Jewish past and village, his obsessions, his fascination with the local voluptuous redhead, a young, innocent but clear-headed
boy (youth), and his search for the mysterious Bianca (wife?) who comes from a conflicting culture, her father raising historical wax figures that
are real people moving like puppets. All this and much more interweaves with many thoughts, psychological symbols, meditations on tradition and
Jewish existentialism, the sets, locations and people appearing out of nowhere and flowing together like a dream. Drifts at times and is quite long,
but altogether a beautiful, multi-layered, challenging and fascinating experience. This one goes very well together with Terayama's films.
Hour-Glass Sanatorium, The
A valiant and interesting attempt at psychological horror by way of Lynch, and I don't compare movies to Lynch lightly. It starts very slowly and roughly,
draws in a patient and participating viewer during the middle section using deliberate atmosphere and sound, then comes together beautifully for the psychologically
horrifying and surreal ending. Three young men working together in a marketing startup company decide to hike to the woods for a photo shoot. But how well do
they know each other and what will emerge in their personalities when they are disconnected from the commercial world of plastic veneers and marketing facades?
Several other elements all tie into this theme: One man is an amateur painter and is strangely challenged by portraits and faces, they are working on an ad for
a liquid that cleans surfaces, there is blurriness in some pictures and in his eyesight that seems to have a hidden meaning, etc. Stick with it and think.
An underrated movie.
I Can See You
This is one of those magical-realist blends of sci-fi, surrealism and fantasy like Donnie Darko and MirrorMask. For the first half you will be held by its
grip, a new world opens up and its rules and elements very slowly unfold. People appear in a flash in the middle of the night and link to human dreams and nightmares,
strange black figures with faces hidden behind glasses and warped transparent screens, a strange disfigured character kidnaps a girl, warriors fight, and so on,
all wonderfully filmed to give the impression of other dimensions at work. The story of a man and his daughter emerges, their relationsip and a troubled past.
The second half has one flaw in that it explains everything to death, but despite this pandering to brainless audiences, it works nicely and the human, surreal,
metaphysical and emotional threads reach an obvious but wonderful climax.
A delightful cult movie if I ever saw one. A very low-budget sci-fi fantasy from Russia, this tells the tale of two hapless pedestrians who accidentally
get sent to another world and try to make their way back while trying to survive the severe and absurd class system of another planet. Amongst other things in
this absurdly hilarious world, people are defined by a colorful gadget, yellow pants and flashing light head-gear and the lowly must perform terrible musical
numbers in cages. Matches are worth their weight in gold, and the vocabulary consists of about 10 words, with 'Kuh' covering everything else. Endlessly inventive
and guaranteed to satisfy silly cult movie fans.
A great absurdist surrealist comedy from the UK. A being emerges from the sewer on the day of a solar eclipse and starts the apocalypse. Only this isn't
raging fire and brimstone or a comet, but chaos. He exchanges personalities with various people and antagonizes the system and reality, shutting down the
London Underground by turning it into a cult and passage to the afterlife, policemen report window conspiracies, fishery ministers declare war, the government's assets
are transferred to an old man's bank account, a talk show spouts random nonsense about the situation, a man with god-like powers makes things disappear, etc.
A blind policeman tries to stop this through the astral plane. The cinematography shifts chaotically from MTV to silent film, the soundtrack changes from middle-eastern
chants to trance, and people get stuck in a film-loop. The atmosphere is as if David Lynch were filming absurdities instead of nightmares. Fascinating and amusing.
Nine Lives of Tomas Katz, The
A prequel to the incredible Ichi the Killer (Miike) directed by his cinematographer. This low-budget, twisted work may indulge itself in too many pointless
camera tricks and suffer under its miniscule budget, but its acting, story-telling and black heart are all in the right place. This is Ichi-lite, the
high-school version. Ichi is constantly bullied even by small kids but is perversely attracted to extreme cruelty and butcher shops. Mr Dai is a superb
and brutal boxer with an existential need to be the number one fighter in all high-schools. When the riveting Onizami joins in and changes the rules of
the game by breaking bones with uncompromising brutality, Ichi explodes into a perverse, sado-maso killing machine.
By far the most enigmatic and abstract creation by the existential Ingmar Bergman. This one baffles and evokes numerous interpretations but always creates
a spell. My own impression is that this is an ultimate study of existentialism and being. As usual, Bergman asks more questions than he answers: What makes
us who we are? How do we separate ourselves from the influences, traumas, masks, and habits that make up our character? What if we are only masks and actors?
An actress breaks down after a dark epiphany because she does not know who she is anymore and a nurse takes care of her, effectively becoming her soul (Alma).
Personalities transfer, they merge until even the husband cannot see who is who. The actress studies and tries to transfer Alma's character to her own, even
sucking her blood in the process. Alma goes along at first but then resists and learns her own self. Words in an erotic story are so vivid they become reality,
the film breaks down at a character development climax and forces us to remember we are only seeing masks. The film provokes the audience with random provocative
images and the actresses are themselves affected by photographs of real traumatic events. Many more intriguing details appear after multiple viewings. A treat
for people that like to be challenged.
The equivalent of staring at Escher drawings while contemplating existential philosophy for 100 minutes, this endlessly inventive movie is fiercely self-referential.
Incredible, live, 3d optical illusions and uniquely inventive special effects punctuate a meditation on what we are and what is the mind's I, serving as mental
provocations in the best tradition of Dada art. The movie shows a character who is writing the movie, and the movie dictates the character and his actions. Real life
seeps into the movie but becomes part of the movie, etc. But this is just the tip of the iceberg, as every other minute there is another self-referential game,
wonderfully imaginative twists, and jaw-dropping illusions, all coming together as a mental gymnasium while the character reaches an existential crisis and nearly
goes insane. The movie has superb momentum and timing, knowing when to pile on the mind-warping tricks, and when to stop for Tarkovsky-esque meditation. This is the
movie Being John Malkovich wished it were. Ultimately rewatachable.
Sea That Thinks, The
Svankmajer would have been proud of this one. A re-imagining of the Tom Thumb fairy-tale that is both grotesque and cruel/dark, perhaps a bit too cruel. But the
imagination, visuals and painstaking stop-motion animation work are all superb. Tom is born to a sick mother after an artificial insemination accident involving an insect.
He is a tiny doughy-fetus-like creature, and the evil laboratory powers-that-be soon kidnap him for some cruel experimentation in an astounding lab full of grotesque
living body-parts and mutated creatures. An escape with the help of a lizard-like creature leads him to a little city of tiny people like him, one of which found a
way to wage war on the giants. Everything is slimy and crawling with bugs, and the humans are real actors that have been filmed in stop-motion style with a seamless
integration with their clay counterparts. I can only imagine how painful that must have been to film. The ending is disappointingly unrewarding, and the cruelty
sometimes seems gratuitous, but the trip is still worth it
Secret Adventures of Tom Thumb, The
Great short movies are getting lost amidst thousands of unseen little pieces out there that never get distributed. Synapse and Fantasia film festival attempt
to correct this by releasing a compilation of the best and most striking sick little shorts from the past few years. Hopefully, there will be more of these releases.
Features 13 various shorts, of which at least a handful are guaranteed to be exceptional. Standouts: "Abuelitos" - an atmospheric, disturbing short that gets under your skin
about old men in a decrepit building and their mysterious meals and hygiene habits, "Love From Mother Only" - a horrifying gore movie about evil, sex and possession,
Tea Break - both hilarious and sickening featuring a conveyor belt human abattoir, and "The Separation" - a stop-motion poetic, twisted and depressing piece about separated
siamese twins that long to get back together.
A mainstream, subtly surreal movie with some Lynchian aspirations. A psychiatrist tries to help a strange and suicidal college student who for some reason knows he is going
to kill himself in three days time. His girlfriend, who was also suicidal in the past, tries to help, but things become more and more confusing. The movie uses many
great transitions and beautifully tricky cinematography and editing that reminded me of Robert Lepage, and many subtle odd touches such as multiple twins and triplets,
time-bending and time-loops, some fantasy, or pants that are too short, to drop hints of what is to come. The ending kinda ties it all together, but not necessarily
in a logical sense, and you have to think about it as a right-brain, dream-logic, emotional experience driven by human needs to extract the factual details from the
rest. Because of all this, viewers of this movie either tend to wrongfully hype this movie's genius, or discard it as empty and confusing, but it's a good movie
nevertherless and beautifully put together, subtly evading the twists that experienced movie-goers will easily predict by not allowing it to fit too neatly into
these theories. A good, albeit relatively inferior companion piece to Donnie Darko, but a slightly better variation of The I Inside.
5 intertwined crazy plotlines with insanely colorful cinematography. A man repeatedly kills his wife only to have her come back more annoyed than ever, a family man
is hypnotised into thinking he's a bird with unfortunate consequences, teenage thieves deal with a homosexual complex, a maker of crazy commercials tries to deal with
annoying coworkers and husbands, and a British hit-man asks his victims their function in life via a Japanese interpreter. Visually stunning, very entertaining
(but with a flawed, overlong second half), and works at several levels, one being the connecting theme of karma and accepting things in life in order to survive.
Survive Style 5+
A unique classic that set the standard for backwoods horror and which has never been duplicated since. A group of youngsters, one disabled and prone to morbid
interests and childish tantrums, stay unexpectedly at an old heirloom house, and encounter an extremely demented family as their neighbours with deranged
obsessions for the meat industry and slaughter houses. Avoids the Hollywood teenage-horror cliches, masterfully builds a horrific and brutal atmosphere
mostly thanks to a great sound design, and is still very disturbing and unrelenting today.
Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The
I'm not usually a fan of anthologies or the popular triptych omnibus approach to releasing short movies, but this is the most successful and delightfully
strange one yet. The theme is the effect of life in a big city taken to absurd extremes, and these movies could have been based in any city except they
use some Tokyo-specific details. Michel Gondry's "Interior Design" whimsically explores the attempts of some youngsters to find their place in the city,
with amusing battles involving apartment-hunting and car-pound beaurocracy. When a girl finds herself superfluous and lost, her body mutates into something
more useful... Leos Carax's "Merde" features an inspired unforgettable creation in the misanthropic sewer-dwelling foreigner with a crooked red-beard
and a language that involves high-pitched grunts and slapping. When he terrorizes the city with general abuse and old Nanking grenades, they take him to
trial. Bong Joon-Ho's "Shaking Tokyo" is my favorite, dealing with a hikikomori (Japanese city-hermit) with OCD who falls for a pizza-delivery-girl and forces
himself to go out of his house for the first time in 11 years with surreal results. Everyone seems to have their own favorite, but I like how all three
different but inventive shorts join forces to create a delightful portrait of extreme city life.
A twisted triptych of tales on the topic of losers who have really lousy lives only to get hit by something
worse to make things more miserable. The first one is dumped by his team-mates, girlfriend, and parents, arrested,
and then God punishes him by turning him into a fly. The second marries a pregnant slut and is forced to take care of the baby while she
has loud sex with the violent neighbour who steals his electricity. The third vulgar idiot takes drugs to avoid marriage
and is hit by lightening only to find he has switched bodies with a new born baby (to the horror of the parents).
A lurid, fast-paced, surreal exercise in nasty dark humor.
Another intellectual metaphysical movie by Subiela, this one employing surrealism to explore life itself. A man emerges from the sea and walks to a strange
beach-hotel where abandoned luggage is piled up in the lounge and men line up to look through keyholes. He knows he is in a dream and even grows to think
he is living someone else's dream. He discusses various aspects of this dream-life with a mysterious woman who serves as his emotional guide, considering
whether it would be good to leave this life, how it is possible to enjoy it, and whether it would be better to confront or kill the person or God who is dreaming them.
The movie is existential and mesmerizing, but not particularly insightful or coherent, and it simply tries to hard to be weird and Lynchian, yet at the same time is
very anchored in its intellectualism. The guests in the hotel talk in random absurdities or pseudo-profound aphorisms, a priest advises to masturbate, a man congratulates
another on being an imbecile as expected, people line up to peer through a keyhole to see strange or kinky erotica, miracles transform a picture of a suffering
Jesus into a toy for a young boy, a lottery metes out deaths, and mothers are consumed. Intriguing but unrewarding.
Adventures of God, The
A TV mogul has taken over the world, stealing all the people's voices except for one hooded singer whom he uses as entertainment. He plots to take away
more from the people while feeding them TV cookies but a group may have found a way to topple his tyrannical rule with the help of a boy with no eyes.
Weird elements include a rat-like henchman, a man with a screen covering his face, balloon suits and more. This is visual candy, but empty, like an MTV
homage to 20s expressionism and fantasy with a nod to Guy Maddin. The style is a shiny silent film, but the dialogue is splayed all over the screen with
endlessly inventive and distracting text effects. I'm also not sure as to how they communicate and why they move their lips even though they have no voice,
and why bells make noise but machine guns make text effects.
Aerial, The (AKA Antena)
A beautifully shot sick movie. This short features high production values, great camera work and colors,
crystal clear sound, no dialogue, very realistic special effects and extreme graphic detail of an autopsy
and necrophilia while performing an autopsy. The ending is as subtle as it is thought-provoking and
raises this whole sickening work into the single most gut-wrenching and extreme expression of irony ever made.
Hungarian Lynchian murder-mystery in a pastoral setting. A man is looking for a house in the country he supposedly inherited. He wanders between sparse
homes and their strange occupants in search of his home, but everything feels off and disjointed, and the local folk seem to be occupied with dark secrets
involving violence. Dreams merge into reality, blackouts transport him and us to different places and times in the non-linear story, with key objects
that include snail shells with a hole in them, and a broken watch and toy. As far as tension, odd mystery and atmosphere go, this film is masterfully constructed.
But, disappointingly, the movie goes nowhere and ends up being a murder-mystery exercise that makes absolutely no sense, perhaps a bit like a Robbe-Grillet story,
which would be interesting except the motivations are completely missing and everybody as well as nobody seems to have committed a crime.
After the Day Before
This Croatian oddity starts as an intriguing meditation on loneliness, then changes into a disappointingly near-conventional psychological thriller
with a twist. A man lives in what looks like a dark dilapidated warehouse with his woman, their relationship a shambles as well. Dialogue is minimal
or uncomfortable and fragmented, sex is mechanical while each obsesses on their own weird fetishes, he takes an erotic picture of her then leaves her alone
to brood over it, she has a strange affinity for fish in her bath, etc. One day he accidentally kills a boy and covers it up. He collects sounds
and has an affair with a strange woman who provides him with sounds in a garbage dump marketplace, but his past starts to catch up wth him. Unfocused.
Amateurish dream-logic explores the mind of a persecuted almost-braindead young man in an insane asylum. For some unknown reason, he is constantly
being chased by women who want him, use him, and get him in trouble, to the point where his own doctor rapes him while he's in a vegetative state.
Memories of his life as a T-Shirt designer help unravel his past, with several objects and words repeating themselves as in a dream, especially a mysterious
t-shirt that says "Foxy Lady". Bugs and mice crawl under everything, t-shirts magically change to express their wearers' personality and intentions,
and a drug causes him to experience a dream where t-shirts are pulled out of his intestines. Unfortunately, the acting is very stiff, hokey and awkward,
and the writing doesn't lead to anything.
Alone in the T-Shirt Zone
Cory McAbee seems to live in his own world populated by very eccentric, catchy and silly music, and I wouldn't be surprised if he were influenced by Zappa.
This is his debut feature after a few unusual musical shorts, and its a bizarre sci-fi creation with its own funny rules that sometimes made me think of Maddin.
Samuel Curtis is on a trading mission to exchange a cat for a real live girl, which he trades on Mars for the "Boy Who Actually Saw a Woman's Breast" so he can
bring the Venusian women a new King. See, women and sex have become extinct ever since the women discovered they can reproduce on their own and moved to Venus.
So he takes part in a weird dance competition, is chased by a killer who only kills for no reason and who performs an insane dance over many little piles of ashes
that were once men, picks up Bodysuit a stinky Earth boy, and witnesses the miners get their morale boosted by a two word description of breasts. All obviously
peppered with McAbee's unique brand of rock music and musical scenes.
American Astronaut, The
A series of surreal and absurd vignettes structured chaotically like a Monty Python episode. The theme is marriage and society, as depicted by a couple
with their marriage on the rocks. The opening scene shows him emerging from the ocean as a sailor, trying to dress her as she sits naked on a toilet seat on
the beach while guests draw near. We then learn they are fighting over dressing and toiletries in order to visit friends they don't want to visit. Commercials
promise marital bliss via various products, Death mows the lawn and drinks beer, absurd TV shows and radio programmes hover in the background, there are gender
and religious politics over a gory abortion, and all the while, their evil, lusty, animalistic, cruel doppelgangers, dressed in leather, stalk them with plans to
Very weird supernatural horror movie by the maker of Death Laid an Egg. A woman is exploiting a large group of people by faking psychic powers, promising
them resolution of their various psychological problems and haunted pasts. Her strange son, whom she has a borderline incestual relationship with, is disgusted
by the whole affair, only he has real powers. He unleashes magic that grows increasingly more bizarre and confusing, abusing and molesting the customers,
releasing an evil poltergeist twin that grows more powerful and abusive, collecting many strange objects and hanging them all over the city, gaining control
over some kids, using them for general malicious deeds, and before you know it, frogs come out of people's mouths, a strange dwarf appears with ominous messages,
and indescribable things happen to crowds in a train and the streets that are for some reason mixed with scenes from a Macedonian rite.
Based on the experimental book by J.G. Ballard that explores the mind of an insane man using segmented but abstractly linked chapters. The mind is
deeply affected by recent atrocities and media events like Marylin Monroe, Kennedy, Challenger, various wars, as well as other difficult and disturbing concepts
such as gory plastic surgery, the dangers of cars and extreme car crashes, pornography, etc. All of these are linked together in the mind and visually in the movie
through geometry, shapes, common features, often shockingly juxtaposing entities such as sex with a model and Ronald Reagan, and car crash dummies with sexual positions
(he also wrote Crash). Important events are recreated and warped through imagination, and then analyzed metaphysically by the scientists who are fascinated by his insanity.
The effect is occasionally interesting and mind-opening in a twisted way but the overall movie is tedious to sit through and unrewarding.
Atrocity Exhibition, The
An attempt at Lynchian dream-logic mystery and dark subject matter with confusing plot jumps. A man finds himself plagued
by memories of a dark ritual involving a murder, he may or may not be locked in an insane asylum with a doctor who is after his
occult knowledge, he finds himself in a House of Love where his fellow patients seem to have secret agendas, a ghostly girlfriend with
confusing purposes is at his back, and an attic with a nightmarish trunk haunts him. The movie fails because it has none of the talented
nightmarish atmosphere of Lynch, and the acting is too mediocre and flat to convince anyone. This is one of those where you constantly
see the cogs turning instead of enjoying the escapism.
Attic Expeditions, The
Written by Dali in 1932 as a follow-up to Chien Andalou and Âge d'or, but, like Destino, only filmed in 2000. The film combines documentary footage
on Dali and public opinion, the screenplay itself, and various images from Dali's paintings come to life, resulting in a deeply surreal and bizarre,
but unsatisfying and uncohesive work. The plot is very simple, presenting a man called Babaouo who is sent for by his love to save her from a castle
imprisonment. He travels through war-torn but surreal landscapes and scenes, has an accident, and takes up painting. Like Chien Andalou, the focus
is on provocatively bizarre imagery and a series of surreal vignettes, including scenes of a large woman smashing a harp with bread, melting omelettes
and clocks laying about in strange places, cyclists with bread on their heads swarming around a piano like ants, strange performers in a tree, an
unwanted corpse, nude disappearing women, esoteric, nonsensical dialogue and poetry, and more.
An incredibly unswerving movie that tells the tale of a 35 year old man who, for his whole life, has been locked up in a squalid room by his abusive and
incestual mother. When he discovers what cling-wrap does around people's faces, he goes out into the world for the first time with pure, childish but warped innocence
and has to deal with music, pizza, women that react in various ways to his perverse innocence, small vs. huge breasts (like mother's), money, jail, rape,
church, etc. A repulsively twisted beginning leads to a fascinating black comedy that pulls no punches while wandering between sickness, laughter, sadness and wonder.
Acted amazingly well by Nicholas Hope. Unforgettable and unique.
Bad Boy Bubby
Skolimowski previously made two increasingly complex but playful movies following the adventures of a man finding his place in society. Long, meandering and complex takes
focus on this alienated man as the scenery magically changes around him, employing snippets of whimsical dialogue, satirical humor and random social interactions to
portray personal feelings of cynical but confused existentialism. With Barrier, Skolimowski extends this approach into Felliniesque deliriousness and surrealism.
In this exploration, the man is a medical student tested by fellow students in an initiation ritual, receives a symbolic piggy bank from society, and a sabre from his father,
escaping into society where he encounters many barriers built by generation gaps, money, religion and social classes. He courts an elusive female tram-driver, he symbolically
tries to climb walls decorated with chickens, crowds run around like sheep, stopped cold by a traffic light and a single car, he goes to a restaurant empty of customers but
full of waiters, and pays for his meal with his piggy bank, and suddenly the restaurant is full of dancing customers wearing paper hats, he fights a car with his sabre, etc.
A difficult but interesting, rich and creative movie with many strange scenes and complex takes that feel both whimsical and carefully constructed, just like Jazz.
Wacky Japanese black comedy about a Kotatsu (heater in the shape of a table) that comes alive and eats people. It is brought into a house where
a gentle old couple commit suicide via clock, a rock band practice at all hours of the morning and abuse their neighbour, all of whom are in love with
the same schoolgirl, and a woman is trying to get rid of her husbands body and keeps the upper half in a bucket. To fight the evil Kotatsu, come
a master electrician and an unfortunate Buddhist with sunglasses. Entertaining silliness.
Battle Heater: Kotatsu
Take the post-nuclear wastelands of junk, wrecks and scraps of Mad Max, mix with very dry Pythonesque absurdist humor, add some surreal touches
and a slew of bizarre characters, and you may get this. A group of very strange characters wander the wastelands, some turning into cupboards,
rooms or parrots, dogged on by policemen in balloons or cranes who tell them to keep moving. A girl is pregnant for 18 months with a creature
and the doctor decides it makes more sense to move the furniture in instead of the baby out, a man is made prime-minister due to his 22-inch
inner leg measurement, a man delivers BBC announcements through a TV frame with only the top third of his suit intact, and a man asks a women
to take his wife's place in throwing dishes at him then calls her a slut, etc etc. The absurd humor doesn't work as often as you'd like and the
consistent strangeness is both its strength and weakness.
Bed-Sitting Room, The
This one makes all surreal movies look like children's stories. The movie is in grainy black and white with
such a dreamlike, muddy quality that many images look like Rorschach tests where you stare and your mind
tries to work it out using its own internal imagination. The story is a metaphysical fable about a god that
kills himself, Mother Nature abused and raped, and the Son of Earth - a gift that is worshipped and then
misused by the people. The dreamlike but dark quality of this movie is truly admirable and there are some
brilliant as well as failed sequences, but overall it goes on way too long.
Featuring a fascinating, fresh idea of a portal into a celebrity's mind and the people obsessed over the experience. A grimy puppeteer, his frumpy wife
(an unregonizable Diaz), and his despicable co-worker/love interest become entangled in an ugly triangle when they discover this amazing and very weird
portal that allows you to experience being John Malkovich for 15 minutes before being dumped in the New Jersey turnpike. Things get increasingly bizarre,
but the second half just gets completely lost in ugly behaviour and gender identity issues, leading to huge disappointment. There is an unforgettable
sequence when John Malkovich finds out what is happening and tries it out himself, and this is generally interesting and entertaining, but it's ultimately
just a collection of repulsive and bizarrely over-the-top characters that take this fun idea down to sickening levels of obsession and egotistical, childish goals.
Being John Malkovich
A movie so magically bizarre I really wanted to like it and tried to find ways to approach it, unsuccessfully. Lily is trying to escape a world gone mad where
men and women are literally at war with each other, brutally killing each other with tanks, fists and machine guns. She runs over a badger, finds herself in
a strange house occupied by a strange, bedridden, whimsical mother who talks to a rat and a radio, a son and daughter, a talking unicorn, many naked children,
and lots of sheep, chickens and insects. There's not much of a narrative, the rare dialogue is cryptic, and instead we get many bizarre or symbolic scenes of
invisible attackers, Lily drinking milk from a huge glass, panties that keep falling down, breast-feeding the old mother, crying flowers, attacking an eagle
with a sword, a series of loud alarm-clocks, etc. It's one thing to decipher or guess at the symbols, and quite another to derive any meaning and Louis Malle's
intentions. It's too bizarre to be a fairy-tale or story, and just a bit too intent and consistent to be a dream. I think it's simply elements from Malle's dreams
forced into an attempted fantasy narrative in an experiment which even he doesn't understand.
A truly one-of-a-kind cult movie. It's a really bad one on many levels, but strangely watchable with camp value. Think young Russ Meyer drops acid and makes a movie
on a pocket-change budget with some friends and neighbours. It's about a 'crew' of insane and violent girls (the narrator explains what a crew means), that go on a
violence and revenge spree to teach misbehaving men a lesson. The narrator, a law-enforcement dude, explains to us their behaviour and actions like something out of
a 60s educational 'scare' movie. The girls are introduced by their kinks, one of them deeply into Christian philosophy and bloody self-flagellation, they wander here
and there, attacking random people in the street and homes. There're smatterings of gore and nudity, but at the level of an Andy Milligan flick. Someone's dining room
serves as a 'bar' where guys have an endless improvised conversation, a band plays music while the camera goes psychedelic, a guy orders a bodyguard over the phone and
says that he doesn't mind if the bodyguard wears shorts, there's a ninja academy and 'ninja roulette', the last 20 minutes goes all out into confusing psychedelia as
if the director was taking more and more drugs, and it ends with some nasty drill torture and a feminist moral. Don't look at me; I just describe 'em the way I see 'em.
Blood Orgy of the Leather Girls
Strange stop-motion fairy-tale for adults with similar obsessive-compulsive attention to detail as with Svankmajer. Aristocratic mice pay the Oak Dwellers
(some kind of mammal with beaks) to make them a female doll but they refuse to hand it over when done, developing some kind of relationship with it,
then stitching an egg into its belly and crucifying it on a tree. The mice steal it, develop their own obsession with it, and the oak dwellers go on a quest
to retrieve it, encountering labyrinths, dangerous fruit in a garden, a wizard frog who gives them hallucinogens, a bartering spider-woman, etc. Recurring
themes include red string, tea (sometimes bloody), birds and wings. Very enigmatic and full of elusive symbolism, with hints of new-age circular mysticism,
maybe some comments about social classes or feminism, but ultimately adding up to nothing except a strange, magical but unanchored experience, like a Jodorowsky movie.
Blood Tea and Red String
Mystical-Islamic, symbolic horror movie with surreal and rich visuals. The location, costumes, acting, and makeup are all stunning, making this a must see once,
it's just a pity the movie is impenetrably enigmatic and unapproachable in its symbolism. A flautist and an astronomer are both struck by something otherworldly,
leaving their lives behind to meditate and stay in a remote exotic location in Turkey full of caves and strange pools, and ultimately to face their pasts and a
Master Musician. There are many strange visions that include a skull eclipsing the moon, stoning of a woman with flowers, a Djinn haunting a man in his sleep
in the form of a mosquito, and more. There's a strong primal performance by a deformed actor who lives in the caves, a demonic naked and burnt being that can shoot
fire out of his eyes, a flute duel, the giving birth of a big moth larva, and other unforgettable images. But in the end it's all just images and atmosphere.
Born of Fire
Exquisitely bizarre Syrian surrealism with a national and social message and subtle subversiveness. The movie takes place mostly in a dwelling made of clay that
houses an extended family. Although it sometimes brings to mind Parajanov with its earthy, surreal mannerisms and otherworldly portrayal of traditions, the movie
has its own unique language. The acting is very idiosyncratic, with constant fear and simple-mindedness over-acted with twitching lips, heavy gasps, and emotions
unhinged. The patriarch of the family is dying, a pigeon appears to take his soul, and he must pass on his name to one of three newborns but doesn't. The children
grow up nameless, each attempting to find meaning in their respective approaches of submissiveness, love or abusive power. Religion, ritual and obscure family
tradition fill their lives, and every time somebody questions with a 'what?' the only answer they receive is 'what what?'. In the meantime, the fathers go to war
with Israel and come back covered in mud, with ideas on progress, unity, broad-mindedness and feminism. A challenging, intriguing watch that forces active understanding
through abstruse mannerisms.
Box of Life, The (AKA Sacrifices)
Part surreal existentialist satire, part Bad Taste-like splatstick, and part sick Tromaesque toilet humor. This unique Norwegian film
shows man born from the Earth in a huge vagina, programmed by monks, and sent in business suits with blank papers to kiss statues and finally
end up crawling through the earth's anus. Outlaws become flesh-eating zombie-like creatures and are hunted with brutality by the military.
This leads to many entertaining over-the-top splatter scenes with bodies being sliced or blown up in various ways. If this isn't enough
we get to see a Nazi-like woman who stabs her victims while raping them, and a man getting his anus kicked in so hard he has to plug it
with a bottle of beer. An entertaining movie with great cult potential but one that can't seem to make up it's mind what it wants to be.
Bread and Circus
Early experimental short from the team of Jeunet-Caro about a bunker during some kind of war with a countdown to some unknown catastrophe and the people
inside it. Some electrocute cockroaches, some collect boogers, others go crazy and torture or kill scapegoats, keeping dead people wrapped in strange rooms.
Features the typical eclectic and complex set design and it predates Brazil. Visually and atmospherically interesting, but nothing more than that.
Bunker of the Last Gunshots, The
Ferreri's most bizarre outing, exploring and taking apart gender roles as usual, this time with various different approaches, some of them quite abstract or odd:
Lafayette (Depardieu) is raped by a group of feminist theatre actresses, he often communicates by blowing a whistle, he adopts an abandoned baby-monkey found next to
a huge statue of a dead King Kong, and he works in a wax museum where a Cleopatra heats his loins and a strange aggressively male boss attaches himself to the Roman
wax figures. He also hangs out with a troupe of old people, all of which are either depressed, alone, or nostalgic and all of which seem quaint, irrelevant and
obsolete next to the modern youngsters. The finale features a couple of shocks and some bizarre violence. It seems that women are now scared, confused, aggressors,
modern men are caregivers, and strong men and old people are obsolete.
Bye Bye Monkey
Anthony Newley, an all-around entertainer, made this movie about himself in which he shows a movie he made about himself while talking about his life and a
movie that is currently showing about his life. At first, this seems to be as insufferably self-indulgent as it sounds, but the approach is an attempt
at surrealism a la Fellini's 8 1/2 with brutal honesty and self-deprecating humor and criticism, making this tolerable. Newley acts as Heironymus Merkin,
an all-around performer constantly tempted by a wise-cracking, lame-joke-telling Satan who supplies him with endless sexy women, in between which he
sings and dances. He sometimes appears symbolically as a clown, a faceless puppet, or a ridiculous cartoon character, his women all have sex-oriented
names straight out of a bad James Bond spoof, his story is acted out for his mother and children on a beach filled with memorabilia, stage props and
film canisters, and there's an amusingly dirty fairy tale about a princess and her donkey, and there are actors acting as directors, producers, writers
and critics who provide an ongoing criticism of his movie. The film improves as it progresses, but underneath all the surrealism and songs, this is just
a boring story about a sex-addict, entertainer who mindlessly jumps from one bed into another.
Can Heironymus Merkin Ever Forget Mercy Humppe and Find True Happiness?
Czech surreal political and social satire that uses the backdrop of Jonathan Swift's travels of Gulliver in the countries of Balnibari and Laputa, but with an
atmosphere that is part Kafka, part Lewis Carroll. The movie contains references to all these works, but also takes many bites out of Czech society, history and
politics. The first twenty minutes or so contain a masterpiece of surrealism as a man travels into a strange land by way of dream-logic, his car running away
from him, meeting a dead rabbit dressed in trousers and pocket-watch, wandering through a bizarre house where he meets himself as a child and falls down sideways
through doors, etc. Most of the movie then wanders into something from Kafka's The Castle, only with absurd humor, as he finds himself battling with strange
beaurocracy, breaking odd rules like a day of silence to conserve air, and trying to track down important people that may help him, with continuous distractions
and complications. Citizens get executed for absurd, unexplainable reasons, they look forward to visits from the mysterious floating land of Laputa, build
thinking machines, and he finds that people at the higher rungs of the hierarchy are never what they seem to be. One flaw with this one is its fragmented approach,
and the fact that it lost some of its universal appeal present in Kafka/Swift. I would probably appreciate this more if I were Czech.
Case for a Rookie Hangman
This Czech family movie has something for both adults and children, and yet it may also be too simplistic for adults, and too full of adult themes and symbolism for children.
In a small town, a man overlooks the various characters that are introduced to us, and he tells a strange tale to the children of his adventures with a shipwreck and
magical cat with glasses. Before you know it, a performing troupe arrive in town with the magical cat, and after the delightfuly bizarre magic act with the help of
camouflaged people making various objects float and fly, the cat's glasses are removed. Suddenly, every person is categorized by their misdeeds and is seen in a
psychedelic color as befits their personality. Chaos ensues, the audience go into a dancing frenzy, the adults fear and hate the cat, while the children adore it.
What will happen to the town now? Full of strange slapstick, symbolism, childish charm, and surreal antics.
Cassandra Cat, The (AKA When the Cat Comes)
A very unusually bizarre and surreal 30-minute anime. The background plot is a cat who tries to restore his fatally ill sister's soul after he wrestles for it with
a Buddha-like cat, after which he goes on a metaphysical, surreal and grotesque quest full of visually bizarre adventures to bring her back to life. The imagery
is mever-ending and includes a huge transparent balloon-cloud creature in a whale-circus that causes a flood, carving up a live pig for food and giving some of his
cooked meat back to him, a water-elephant that comes out of the sand which they ride and swim in, a pervert fetish-robot that tries to make soup out of them, time
standing still as God grapples with metaphysical levers and tries to eat planet Earth, and much more, and this is only the describable stuff. This is somewhere
in between random acidic imagery, a surreal-mystical exploration of life and death, and Dali mixed with Bill Plympton. A must-see at least once for fans of the
A 60 minute abstract, meditational, atmospheric and surreal animation (translation: heavy drugs needed) by Piotr Kamler who usually makes shorts. The background description
is of an eternal, mystical, unreachable city of immortals who have mastered time and seek to break their monotony by reaching out to a human (depicted scaling a wall).
Unfortunately, the animation is all about an endless cryptic process of preparation and communication, depicted using silent ancients playing with sticks and flying
spherical objects that keep morphing into other objects or pass through a factory-like process of magical manufacture also involving an endless series of opening doors.
The human falls and is saved with flying magic, encounters the bouncing sphere, cuddling then dancing with it, until the cryptic ending involving an unexpected
disintegration. The atmosphere and bizarre electronic soundtrack may keep your mind hypnotized for a while, but the film is unrewarding.
A screening and releasing company of avant-garde, shocking, experimental or transgressive shorts by various directors.
I'm tempted to call this a more modern incarnation of Zedd's Cinema of Trangression, but that movement had more humor and a conscious lack of artistic pretention,
whereas this markets itself more as arthouse transgression. The shorts vary from bizarre, impenetrable, nightmarish pieces, to filth and pornography with pretentions
of art simply by experimenting with cinematography, editing and sound. You never know what will appear next, from nonsensical Kenneth Anger-esque eclectic occultism
or Satanism, to sophomoric shock involving violence, mutilation, scat, or perverse porn, to purely visual experiments involving light, sound and cinematography and
random footage. The DVD collections released so far are mostly similar in their eclecticism and their titles (L'Èrotisme, Incarnation, À Rebours) won't help you,
since they don't reflect any detectable themes. For those that enjoy experimenting with snippets of avant-garde, transgressive cinema, this will be welcome, and some
of the more strange shorts are mildly intriguing, but I found the content too often disappointingly empty, pointlessly perverse, or sophomorically confrontational
and shocking. Standout intriguing short: Burn by Patrick Jolley.
Unrewarding French dream-logic horror that is basically one long dream-sequence. A woman on the run with her criminal friends has to hide at a derelict warehouse
full of mannequin body parts. Fragments of childhood nightmares blend with reality, teasing with clues as to her psyche, but never coming together. A scary father-figure
with a stain on his hand, a scary man in the warehouse, doors that lock by themselves, but who has the key? Nightmarish chase sequences that never seem to end, random violence
and some gore, a self-mutilated hand, mannequins, a child with a magic warding spell, and so on. Sometimes effective in a surreal way, but it never goes anywhere, it has
no setup, plot or end, and eventually just becomes quite tedious.
Controversial blaxploitation from Bakshi that dives head-first into grotesque stereotypes and a parade of trashy characters. The movie is a pioneering mix of live-action
and animation, mixing a story of a black prison-break with the longer animated tale of the Brother Rabbit, Bear and Preacher Fox. They get in trouble with a racist sheriff
and the sherrif's daughter at a whorehouse, encounter a violent black resistance movement and are sent to kill a redneck cop and a grotesequely fat Godfather who is followed
by an odd entourage of transvestites, a gay son, a headless black man, midget clowns, and bugs. A live stripper strips for an animated sheriff, there's a surreal speech
by the fat, naked head of the resistence, a woman gets killed as she turns into a butterfly, there's an ongoing satirical clash between a small black man and a huge,
white Ms America and it only gets more bizarre towards the end. Fragmented, satirical, trashy and raunchy.
Mix black comedy, horror, a murder mystery, some nasty rape and necrophilia, a touch of incest, a musical, very bizarre agents that sing the American Anthem while prancing
in leotards on TV, and some kung-fu action and what do you get? I don't know, but this movie seems to be directed by a man with many whims. The story goes something like this:
A mother and two daughters are hounded by police and journalists, accusing her son of beheading some schoolgirls. One daughter brings in some nasty psychics with an evil
agenda of their own, convincing their customers to submit to rape, supernatural forces and other nasties. But who really is the murderer? Will breaking out into song
or a flurry of kung-fu save them from the angry mob? And what's with the ending? A bad movie somewhat redeemed by its insanity.
A short, extremely disturbing masterpiece about a marriage that has deteriorated to depression, perversions, long uncomfortable silences, and an unhealthy
relationship between the husband and son. When the wife unsuccessfully tries to get her husband's attention by dressing up, she loses it and goes
to more extreme, gory and nasty self-inflicting measures. Very disturbing and depressing mostly due to the sympathetic character and familiar horrors
of a bad marriage. Featured as the first of three shorts on Family Portraits.
Also featured on an anthology of short tales under the same name, of which the first four are mildly entertaining silliness: A violent
dog that smokes crack, a wife that keeps nagging her husband even after he kills her, a man with an unhealthy obsession for meat and a talking bowl of oatmeal,
and a silly punk teenage angst movie.
Cult movie about an absolutely terrible stand-up comic who grows a strange appendage out of his back, and his hyperactive friend with a taste for hugely fat women and accordions.
They try to make it big in show-business while working in garbage-collection. This one is truly one of a kind with a uniquely bizarre cast of characters,
the actors are almost all covered in slime, grime, filth and garbage, and the scenes keep suprising you. There's an orgy with huge women and dog food, a touch of necrophilia,
and their stage routine keeps getting weirder. Runs out of cult charm towards the end and it's a bad movie overall, but it keeps you watching.
Dark Backward, The
Early Pinku that allegedly started the whole genre and was later remade by the same director with hardcore porn inserts. I suppose it was inevitable that
given the fascination the Japanese have with erotic abusive relationships, that they would somehow find a way to exploit the relationship between a dentist
and a woman. As the dentist manhandles her mouth, she gives in to erotic fantasies then goes under the nitrous oxide. A young man in lust with the woman and
who is being treated nearby also joins in as the three get lost in a surreal romp. S&M, XXX, a naked chase through a hotel, the dentist becomes a vampire,
she beheads him, a ghost train, hardcore porn with a puppet, she finds herself naked inside a car wash, and so on. Also followed by a sequel in 1987 alternatively
named 'Captured for Sex', but which is basically the same movie with tons of sex, then a freewheeling surreal chase through trains, beaches and dungeons with vampire
dentists, lesbian witch nurses, and hallucinative doorways.
A demon falls in lust with a girl, but when she dies from his attentions, he grieves and his blood falls on a bed, turning it into a hungry creature that
digests anything placed on it. The bed can make flowers grow out of a skull, lock doors, drag bodies around, make munching sounds and pour pepto-bismol
out of a bottle. The bed has a pool of digestive juices with blood that can swallow anything without soiling the sheets and it can bring an artist back
as a ghost, paint his fingernails black and imprison him behind a painting. The bed is simply incredible. The only thing more amazing than the fact that
this LSD-inspired surreal idea was conceived, was that it was actually filmed. Very entertaining in a bizarre way and must be seen to be believed.
Death Bed: The Bed That Eats
If you're looking for the cinematic equivalent of a wild LSD trip, look no further. A humanoid female is kept tied up in a decrepit basement
and several unknown groups of people seem to be interested in this creature. When the creature blows dust on some intruders, it sends them off to another world
and gives them deep understanding of... something or another to do with rising above the limitations of flesh. These various parties fight it out amongst themselves,
some turning out to be more than human. That's as much of the plot as one can gather from this bizarre experience however. The real movie is industrial hallucinogetic
horror and gore spliced with random images of people and various creatures doing... random things. Oh nevermind, I give up summarizing this one.
Cult underground film that is a kind of gritty, paranoid, industrial-music-fan's fantasy with the involvement of William S. Burroughs. Big-brother government
and corporations are monitoring the people, controlling information and generating muzak to play in hamburger joints that control people's emotions. When a
youth decodes these signals in his home studio, he literally goes underground where he encounters a cult led by Genesis P. Orridge that treat information
as their religion, make a lot of rhythmic noise on industrial and metal artefacts, and plot a revolution with sound tapes as weapons to disrupt society.
In the meantime, his girlfriend has a bizarre obsession with frogs and a government agent with a strange attitude towards people tries to develop a
relationship with a prostitute. A throbbing, rhythmic, blinking, beeping, whirring, gritty experience with some random disturbing imagery on screens.
In what feels like an enthusiastic, student-made, surreal movie project, a college student dreams of being a pirate in an adult world in between bouts of
college confusion, stress and humiliations. His pirate adventures include strange home-made props as scenery, he travels and clashes with an adult-populated
island, has strange discussions and philosophical arguments about individualism with his mates, and longs for a sorority girl who constantly hovers in his dreams.
Mildly entertaining, sporting nonsensical dialogue, dream-logic, bad acting and bargain-basement surrealism.
Didn't You Hear
In the spirit of Troma and Toxic Avenger, this goofy wannabe-cult film tells the tale of a married, loving, cannibalistic serial killer couple and the evil Nefarious
who wants to turn the whole world into zombie slaves, starting with 3 naked female scientists. After his wife gets kidnapped, Red goes on a road trip in search of
Nefarious, meeting Swedish boobs, trailer trash, angelic pizza guys, and Jamaican gurus, while gorily tearing apart zombies. In the meantime, Nefarious inflates
the unimpressed wife's boobs and gets zombie chicks to hammer his overly enlarged penis while he plays a tune on his prickly butt.
Die You Zombie Bastards!
Greek movie that creates a strange, dream-like world where a man dreams of a confusing shootout in an opera and a woman who loves him, a singer's voice is stolen,
a psychic detective solves a furniture theft using his powers, an oracle tells the future through a tea-cup, and a red-headed whore finds a magic wand that grants her
wishes. The movie's fatal flaw is that it doesn't develop or build up anything, not even a mystery, and wallows in meandering atmospheric strangeness instead, wandering
between its many empty characters. Interesting, but lacking substance and only occasionally effective as a dream..
Dog's Dream, A
A surreal, amusing exploration of sex, love, innocence, knowledge, happiness and capitalism through the sexual awakenings and experiments of Dorothea. She comes
downstairs one day as the parents are narrating their own words and actions, and informs them and us that an alien visited her and left her a strange red meteorite.
The parents immediately are concerned about her sexual habits and thus starts her misadventures with unhappy, perverted or lost people. She tries a sex documentary
with friends, working as a model and prostitute (where she gets abused), befriends a depressed Dominatrix, follows advice from Jesus (who comes to visit her out of
the blue) to sleep with children and fools (a flasher) until she reaches some kind of conclusion in the rural, naked life of the country. In the meantime, her
father works producing bags of canned laughter to make people happy. Didactic and meditative in some parts, an amusing sex romp in others, and unfocused in the rest.
Bonkers Greek trashy satire that is basically a series of vignettes in a freewheeling, gonzo, guerilla style that sometimes feels improvised. There's a vampire
and his team of ghouls that ravage the cemetery for body parts so that they can build the next big music band. But this angers the zombies who promptly go on a
protest march against exploitation of zombie singers. Dracula's daughter(?), who enjoys having sex with dolls, runs off with the fat frankenstein-esque singer who runs
on batteries, and seems to have no inhibitions. They encounter a group of amazonian feminists that watch male bodybuilders and plot against men's rights, they meet
a necrophiliac, are chased by zombies, run into aggressive supermarket salesmen and try-it-before-you-buy-it sex toys, and lots more, until the final concert
of nazi-zombies where they sing full-length, trashy, what-the-hell-was-that songs in front of an audience.
Dracula of Exarcheia
The sets are low-budget German expressionism with garish colors, making the movie look like a cheap cartoon, the actors are mostly deadpan (with notable exceptions)
and perform with their body movements, the insane dialog includes phrases like "My feelings are like filthy prayers. I want to scream in your face", the camp is over-the-top,
there is black-comedy with nudity and nastiness, and the whole effect is surreal. It can't get more cult than this and yet it hasn't gained a following.
The story is secondary but involves a Dr. Caligari who is in charge of an insane asylum and whose questionable methods include human experimentation, playing with
a masochistic cannibal and a nymphomaniac, and the swapping of minds through hypothalamus injections. By a director who otherwise makes bizarre porn like Cafe Flesh
and Night Dreams.
Tobe Hooper's follow-up to Texas Chainsaw Massacre is the closest in plot and mood but
somehow loses the grit and realism amidst too much style and bizarreness that is almost surreal.
A local seedy hotel is owned by a madman who tends to mumble on and on about nonsense, and who owns an insatiable
crocodile to whom he feeds all his guests. This movie visits this location on a very busy night where sometimes
the clients are crazier than the hotel owner. Lots of madness, gore and twistedness ensues.
Eaten Alive (AKA Death Trap)
Bizarre and silly Japanese horror about a girl who starts seeings weird eggs in her eyes. Annoying repetitive imagery of the egg keeps appearing, upsetting her life,
interrupting her work (that consists of clicking on screenfuls of 1s and 0s), and causing all kinds of reactions from her highly eccentric boss, friends and coworkers.
When the egg hatches, a weird monster emerges and she is chased by silly group of police and looney bin doctors, things get even more crazy, silly, surreal and bloody.
Perhaps symbolic of menstrual cycles, but the movie prefers to play it as silly, mildly entertaining horror.
A low-budget B&W that starts as an absurd comedy involving two people stuck in an elevator for days. The guy is a 26 year old virgin, obsessed
with anal sex and venus fly traps that give fellatio, and the girl is an ex-slut born again Christian. They chat, date, share their personal lives,
try to shave and shower, and deal with the sexual tension, all in the elevator. As the days become weeks and then months, she starts mutating, starting
from the genitals which look like something out of Tetsuo. All this leads to an ending which is outrageous on many levels. Must see at least once.
A strange one from the 70s. Eliza is looking for her love and baby with the help of a mysterious old astrologer who lives in a house full of strange characters.
While she is waiting for the predicted One to appear, she lodges in this house and has a series of misadventures while dressing up in increasingly more bizarre
clothes and makeup: She develops a complex relationship with an angry half-native who wants to blow up a bridge infringing on his reservation and home, she
meets a sea captain who has a fetish for dressing her up as a china doll, and have her whip a statue of a centaur he is riding on with her wig while being
filmed, and she joins a strange new-age cult that keeps live specimens of the zodiac signs and participates in bizarre orgiastic rituals while taking
mushrooms. Memories and symbols keep popping up including old baby shoes, her brother, some violence, a guide in an eye-patch, a bearded clown, and all
of this comes together at the end in an all-out surrealistic nightmare. Interesting and unique, but it didn't come together for me and remains an enigma.
An unholy child of Godard's cinematic techniques and Aronofsky's Pi. The story involves a man who gets a job handling obituaries, finds out he was a gear
in the mechanism of an old woman's accidental death, then causality itself goes to hell as past and future get mixed up and he finds himself manipulated
by some mysterious people who are writing him into a script of death. Some surrealism follows, like when he follows a girl down the rabbit hole into a
kitchen cupboard. A quote in the film declares art as exploring death at work but I wonder if he wasn't also going for the quote about only needing a girl
and a gun to make a movie. What makes this movie special is the editing and metaphysics: Scenes are exremely disjointed, cut up into pieces, spliced together,
interweaving past and future, often ending abruptly into long blackouts, all messing with the viewer's mind and his grasp of the sequence of events and
continuity, but also giving the impression that the protagonist is caught in a movie with his actions scripted and his life at the hands of a writer who
has the power to play with his past, his fate, his flow of time, and his actions. The metaphysics are fascinating and raise questions of causality,
choice, fate and accident, but the disjointed editing is very overused and sometimes gets annoying. Unique and interesting but feels more like an experiment
rather than anything complete.
A bizarre fantasy movie by Yuri Ilyenko, the cinematographer for Parajanov. Ilyenko was part of the Ukranian poetic moviement and his movies usually involved
fragmented scenes taken out of a linear story and presented with visual poetry and symbolism. This one is by far his most bizarre, employing freeform magic,
surrealism and slapstick. Elements from various folklore stories are used in this extremely fragmented movie, but the main story involves a man in love with
a woman whose father gave her away in marriage to a rich friend. The love-stricken man finds himself tempted by a demonic figure who promises him gold
if he will sacrifice a young boy. Greed and madness overtake him. The many scenes include hallucinations of gold and violence in a cave, people that float
in slanted or parallel posiitions to the floor, bizarre games with animals like putting candles on crayfish and throwing pigs down chimneys, an odd scene of
cloned villagers with identical trees and huts dancing for a European kid monarch, religious symbolism, some random slapstick, and many other strange elements.
Eve of Ivan Kupalo, The
This sequel in name only is vastly different and features a very bizarre blend of gory slashings by disturbed female characters,
a creepy child-ghost that may or may not be behind all the strange behaviour, nightmarish surreal sequences, and sleazy perversions.
The plot is incomprehensible but seems to involve lots of psychotic guilt over an abortion or two, an obese projectionist with no friends and
dark secrets, and a celebrity who seems to be insanely jealous of the projectionist. Very artistically striking and beautifully shot violent scenes,
atmospheric music, some disturbing and dense nightmares, but incoherent.
Evil Dead Trap II
A fitting companion piece to May, with another fascinatingly black and campy look at a disturbed teenager and the twisted troubles she gets herself into. She has a fascination
with all things gory and bloody, fancies herself a medical expert, and even approaches her first sexual experience as a medical experiment involving blood (don't ask).
AnnaLynne McCord spends the whole movie in acne, mouth sores and bushy eyebrows, freaking out everyone around her. But the trouble with this one is that, the way
she is acted, her character obviously knows exactly what she is doing and gleefully and sadistically does it anyway, then pretends nobody understands her and blames
her behaviour on biology. In other words, despite its uniqueness, this is just another movie about a disturbed, sadistic psychotic, and could have been much better
with the same script but a different, perhaps more confused characterization. The movie is peppered with numerous dream sequences involving disturbed fantasies,
necrophilia, a grotesque abortion, and other various gory, depraved and bizarre shenanigans. It also features John Waters as a priest with the job of healing
her soul. Enough said.
Compilation of 6 shorts from various periods, all featuring experiments with sight and sound rather than plot. The first four are mostly forgettable,
featuring strobe effects, kaledoiscopic images, warped film stock, double images, etc. as well as some typical 60s psychedelic and colorful imagery, all
more of an assault on the eyes and the head rather than anything terrorizing. Virgin Suicide features a Satanic montage of images that would go well with
a Kenneth Anger short. The last two stand-out however: Tuning the Sleeping Machine is one of the best examples I've seen of nightmare-cinema, capturing the chaotic
jumble of colors, lights and images inside an unfiltered brain, creating an intensely hypnotic and dark experience. Dawn of an Evil Millennium is an '18 minute
trailer for an 18-hour epic' involving demons, sorcerers, aliens, action, car-chases and whatnot, with a unique approach of combining silly slapstick and
sound effects with chaotic demonic splatter, action, fantasy and psychedelic sound and atmosphere.
Experiments in Terror
The ultimate poser movie about posing, overacting, public relations, fake happiness and control. This quirky Japanese movie tells the tale of a water tycoon
that convinced the world his water makes you young and perky, and his two sons, a spoiled immature man and the younger troublesome impetuous son that doesn't
seem to fit in. They talk and interact with ridiculous flourishes, synthetic dialogue and poses, keep a weird wild creature in the basement who hates the older
son, they play for hours with train sets and toy animals, making sure they pose in just the right way, the public relations girl keeps a pet budgie on her
shoulder, and sometimes they go to a psychedelic disco to dance with large women and fathers. The movie is quicky light stylish fun awash with 60s colors,
clothes and hairdos, but the message about being yourself is childish and empty.
I'm really starting to wonder why only women get surreal coming-of-age movies. That aside, this is a movie by Piotr Szulkin who previously made an interesting and unusual
trilogy of dystopian sci-fi movies. Think of this as a kind of erotic Wojciech Has movie, where the surreal effortlessly blends with the real to explore the workings
of the sexually frustrated female mind. The female in question is a married woman whose husband just ran off for a month. Her mother dies, forcing her to revisit her home,
and she finds herself revisiting her childhood as expressed through frustrations with her marriage. Fantasies go wild, exploring flings with strangers and women,
then experimenting as a prostitute for a day for an absurdly insane client, all linked to events in her childhood involving moral and disciplinary lessons,
first kisses and fondles, haunted by surreal visions of an ominous masculine figure in uniform hovering over her bed while society, family and friends break into
absurd parades, dialogue and dances. This underdeveloped and confused lens of the past combines with her current desperate outbreaks and rebellions to explore
her psyche as tries to release her long pent up psychological blocks via sex, even if it may be a romp with an undertaker that merges with surreal visions of death and childhood
that enables her to release herself from her mother. Interestingly done, with a welcome light touch.
What the...? OK, let's try this description: Imagine a forgotten fantasy screenplay by Tarkovsky, with ponderous, slow-moving, meaningful magic, which was then picked
up the Monty Python troupe on a very silly day who then decided to film it for fun but would add something silly to every scene. See, there are these two ghosts
roaming the countryside on a quest to re-enter the world of the living, except they are two guys in sheets with holes for their eyes. They ride a horse, but then
the horse turns into a pantomime horse with a spinning head, and they then meet an oracle who helps them find the right path, except the oracle seems too much of
an annoying hippy and we all know what must be done to hippies right? And so on, with slow-moving beautiful scenery, and two guys in sheets meeting one weird person
animal, or object after another in their search for new life, even if it includes peering into a tree and watching a Catalan video artpiece involving vomit and
experiments with mice.
The only attempt at an adaptation of this most difficult of novels by James Joyce. Although there were attempts at extracting a narrative and fleshy characters
from the book, the writing is based on playful language and dream-logic, inventing its own words that are remotely English and perhaps Irish, allowing them to be recognized
in a mad Lewis Carroll way, but twisting them around to play dense puns, games, and free associations with obscure or playful allusions, all carefully constructed
to create a rhythm and patterns that will appeal to a stream of consciousness. The movie creates literal visuals to go with the flowing imagery of the book that
rapidly moves and shifts between scenes as in a dream. Finnegan is challenged by having to attend his own wake, and characters interchange, representing various
aspects of his life and ideals, as well as his own self. The movie is not about the visuals or story however, and the scenery merely provides more fuel for the
language blender and sculptor that is James Joyce. The language is so difficult and dense, it is presented in subtitles. At times playfully interesting,
especially to the most literary and academic, but rapidly grows tiresome and is probably best taken in smaller doses.
A real murder in a small town in Kansas is given a melodramatic, surreal and over-the-top gothic treatment probably modeled after David Lynch's Blue Velvet.
A very abusive big brother terrorizes his mother and younger brother who wants to do 'sissy' things like play piano. Emotions boil, and the local police-woman
starts investigating. In a parallel story reminiscent of Browning's Freaks, a carnival is in town featuring real freaks, a disfigured woman and her very sick
and sadistic boss, both acted by the same actors in the roles of the mother and son, giving the grotesque sideshow a surreal, psychological, symbolic and
Oedipal edge. The abusive son got her pregnant and enraged the boss, and the young son wants to run away with her and play music, and all the while, a
strange mystical woman lives in the plains and appears with cryptic messages. A mixed bag, with some striking and intense moments, but others don't work
as well due to the slightly overdone melodramatic treatment and mediocre acting.
I could swear this was a Guy Maddin movie, except this somehow surpasses even Maddin in its inscrutable oddness. I'll do my best to describe this one: Imagine
a complicated shooting gallery with miscellaneous bric-a-brac hydraulically moving and floating as shooting targets. Its visual themes include a mish-mash of pharmacy,
living quarters, and bee-keeping. Now imagine that inside this shooting gallery, while outsiders keep shooting at the moving objects, a man actually lives his
life and somehow all the hallucinative moving objects become part of his daily routine. He stares wistfully across the way at his love, The Wooden Embalmer, a broken down
carnival ride that tends to cause gruesome accidents to its riders. Now imagine a whole movie based on this concept, made as a silent movie with intertitles, carnival
sounds, organs and hydraulics, the mechnical man constantly harrassed or haunted by increasingly strange moving objects, including a floating beehive, his genital props
stored in a closet, and an aggressive wig. Individual lengthy scenes may consist simply of animated objects, such as a 'stomach-ache' mechanical man belching out objects
at a moving box on rollers covered in leaves. It's that odd and indescribable. The lack of narrative and its endless fascination with odd moving objects can get tedious,
but it's definitely one-of-a-kind and very atmospheric.
Forget Rocky Horror Picture Show. This incredibly offbeat cult musical is much more bizarre and creative, and even quite amusing
at times. Try to imagine very quirky comic-book characters mixed with John Waters trashy acting, costumes that look like someone
collected every item in cheap leftover wardrobes and put them together randomly, sets made of cardboard and sketches, some stop motion animation,
very unpredictable behaviour and plot development, and campy dialog. The story isn't the star of the movie but it involves a door to a sixth dimension
via a large intestine, where a midget king rules while a tuxedo wearing frog waits and a human chandelier swings. Other characters include a
machine-gun toting schoolteacher, Satan, chicken boy, and a trio of prostitutes who get humped by passers-by. This one makes you wonder whether
someone slipped you a drug in your drink.
Experimental, absurd and unique film that invents a foreign country and language called Bulbovia, and then features a group of Bulbovians
doing strange Bulbovian things in the forest while speaking Bulbovian. What looks like a team of soldier-scientists are to occupy new
territory while conducting bizarre scientific experiments and readings, and reaching absurd objectives. One is in a wheelchair, and his partner
is shocked at the social irresponsibility when he decides to leave his wheelchair, his abandoned wife sells the children to join them in the
forest but soon falls for a strange meek local who lives in a barn and logs his daily hygiene habits. Other locals include some annoyed cows, and
two people in bizarre costumes playing games with an inflatable ball. What's strange is that we can recognize how this alien culture is
eroded by local customs and the tensions rise, leading to fights with chickens as boxing gloves, and force-feeding of milk. Did I also mention
that the whole movie features four people?
Obscure but intriguing French surrealism. In a barren landscape, there is a 'water factory' where everything is run with absurdly incomprehensible rules and games.
The workers are chosen by how far they can rotate a toy airplane, the work involves strange sisyphean contraptions for carrying water, and the currency is miserly portions
of water handed out in pots and pans, and cut-up newspaper coupons, prepared by the owners themselves. But no sooner do they get paid and carefully put together the pieces,
the workers have to spend it on various odds and ends, including a lottery machine that chews up the paper and spits it out, while the bosses play in a luxurious swimming pool
playing silly games. So far, an absurd and surreal attack on capitalism and the rat race. But then it gets weird. There's a gardener that plants flowers and plants in secret
places, and in coal-trolleys, wasting massive amounts of water. There's a strange woman, and a very strange love blossoms, typified by a scene where he declares his love
in a sea of foam and with trolleys full of flowers, during which she has to guess a season. He then goes berserk for no discernable reason, there's a mini-revolution by
the workers, and, well... the film loses all coherence. But it's still an intriguing, entertaining and interesting watch.
A one-of-a-kind drug-zombie movie, as long as you aren't expecting a zombie movie that is. The main protagonists, as well as the movie itself, are non-aging
hippies, after 30 years of drugs and philosophizing, that are so braindead, they became zombies, suddenly erupting in random gory violence and feasting
on the squares. But this is not about flesh-eating, or even about camp. This movie is about the various freaks of society and various generations. Hippies,
alien conspiracy freaks, the sarcastic-know-it-all-slacker generation, a comic-book freak that thinks the hippies are vampires, goth-kids and metal-heads,
e-popping party animals, each spouting their nonsensical philosophies and thoughts, sometimes hearing voices, the movie's coherency deteriorating along with
your mind, until all of the freaks start to merge despite living in their own hazy islands, some converting and becoming zombies too. Probably the most bizarre
zombie movie ever made with a merciless drug-hazy atmosphere. If this wasn't made while on heavy drugs, then nothing was.
Grateful Undead, The
Surreal, arthouse, atmospheric animation for adults that leaves you with mystical mysteries in your head. This is a desert world, possibly post-apocalyptic,
and materialistic objects haunt the land. The people of the desert walk amongst sand, ruins, and massive objects of worlds past such as clocks and glasses,
in awe of various legends, hunting ostriches for their feathers, hiding from unseen passing beings, walking on stilts on the treacherous sands, and telling
of the legends behind hovering lights. A girl joins them with strange behaviour that seems to know no fear, and there is a boy who has strange dreams and some
kind of link with the gods of the past. She accompanies an old woman on a quest through mountains of objects to a city populated by strange cult worshippers
of product catalogs...
Gwen, the Book of Sand
A disturbing study of lust and loneliness by exploring such characters as a depressed woman who coldly repulses
her lovers, a writer in search of raw emotion who tries to find it in rape, a wimpy obscene phone caller,
and a pedophiliac father. Their lives are explored graphically and sympathetically, with painful scenes such as
when the pedophiliac attempts to explain his affliction to his son through tears. Well done, but too unrelentingly repulsive and disturbing.
The director seems to be more interested in uncovering filth in a realistic and sympathetic way rather than in offering insights.
Who needs a movie just to show what filth and depression look like?
Bizarre and surreal social satire from Denmark that pushes chaotic absurdity so far at times, it becomes reminiscent of Dada. An uptight, confused
man lives with his wife and maid next to a big tree. He suspects people live up in the tree when he keeps finding various items and trash under the tree.
The government appointed street cleaner doesn't do much, except occasionally take trashy people off the street and into the garbage. He suspects the maid
of stealing food and sexual perversions, and the police precinct is literally a farm with insane cops imprisoning lamps and horses. A guru preaches about
taking drugs and literally flying, parades of naked hippies perform bizarre ceremonies at night then fall out of the trees while trying to fly, etc.
Other odd bizarre scenes include a man in a flying machine about to dive into a pool crammed full of people instead of water, a tree full of butts,
a dangerous moving iron, hairy cleavage, and more. Very entertaining strangeness.
Hash Tree, The
Director David Jarab previously made a less bizarre but more absurd film Fatherland, that pokes fun at upper-class
traditions in Bunuelian fashion using a strange hunt of human-like creatures. In this impenetrably bizarre movie, he pulls out all the stops of surrealism. The story
itself, unfortunately, makes no sense on its own, and can only serve as metaphor. But since we have no clue what the key to the metaphor is, the movie fails to reward
us. The setting is WWI in Eastern Europe, and the themes, presumably, involve body parts as a metaphor for different aspects of a whole serving different purposes,
and what happens when each part is separated, sought after on its own, and given independent life. Within this theme, we get a nonsensical tale involving a Colonel
and his occult obsessions, whose head, hands and heart are removed after his ritualistic death, each body part serving different people and living a life of its own.
There are also mysterious gems, an apathetic wife that welcomes her ex-husband's friends into her bed as well as his severed finger to keep her company, an obsession
over chickens and beheading them, and so on. The movie gets points for an intriguing atmosphere and cinematography, and someday, someone may figure out what it
all means, but in the meantime, it gets stored on a dusty shelf.
Head - Hands - Heart
Another bizarre cinematic allegory by Herzog. A small village in Bavaria that lives on their export of ruby glass has lost the only
man who knows how to make this glass. A local mystic continuously prophesizes about events both big (the world wars to come) and small
(free beer), and poetically describes cataclysms and existential crises. Two men are fated to fight and one to die under another,
and they catatonically fulfill this prophecy. Other locals also seem insane or catatonic, a man is tested for signs of life using a
barking dog poked by a gardening fork, a strange woman with short hair strips and dances, and there is a twisted relationship between
a laughing old man and a young girl. Most of the symbolism is too obscure and impenetrable but the movie as a whole is intriguingly
pensive, poetic and pastoral with beautiful scenery.
Heart of Glass
Not a slasher film. This cult classic goes into the mind of a remorseless serial killer who
calmly and carefully kills dozens of people at random for entertainment, to vent his twisted drives or
merely to pass the time. Along the way he 'befriends' an abused stripper, attracted and intrigued by his murder of his mother,
and her incestuous brother who is drawn in to the murdering sprees while filming them with a video camera. No camp,
no excess gore, no dishonest heroic portrayals, and no message, just twisted and cold film-making.
Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer
Obscure Catalan film made during Franco's regime by Antoni Martí i Gich. Unfortunately, lack of subtitles make it impossible to review properly, so this will only be
based on impressions and guesswork: The film is divided into 10 segments, the first of which tells a dramatic tale of doomed love between an ordinary couple that
soon find themselves corrupted in a mad society. The rest of the episodes seem to make fun of the various people in power, from the oligarchy, to the church, to
the fascist regime, filmed as vignettes low-budget guerilla-style, dressing up various people in cheap over-the-top costumes as they partake in surreal debauchery,
decadence, worship of power, pomp and ceremonies, with srange scenes of angels shot down by a half-naked transexual, hordes of men in suits clamoring for an autograph,
a musical set in a hospital with a flippant crew operating on a man with a hand in his chest, and lots more, many of them set to music.
Hic Digitur Dei
Partially deserved hype accompanies this experimental 7-hour movie about Hitler. The approach is artsy, philosophical, operatic in its passionate, grand portrayal of
the period and the coming of Hitler, and surreal in its stagy, bizarre sets and oddly costumed narrators and guides that serve as a strange abstract visual backdrop
to the poetic narration and historical footage, quotations and audio. The result is a deep and sweeping understanding of Hitler and what he represented to Germany
and the world. A vision that doesn't glamorize him, or attempt another dry documentary with facts, or another historical dramatic recreation, but something new.
It is careful with its condemnation, always keeping it personal and close to us the audience, and it emphasizes the fact that Hitler would have been nobody without
the masses who needed him, so that understanding will come through personal introspection and indirectly through a poetic and thoughtful narration. His personal
life, quotes, attitudes, viewpoints, helpers and friends are also explored through many writings of his associates read by performers on stage. The big flaw is
the length, much of it spent on needless flights of arthouse fancy, mildly interesting theatrical performances and puppets, and pointless tangents on minutiae,
or rants about the artists of the time. A much more powerful 3 hour movie could be extracted from this.
Hitler: A Film from Germany (AKA Our Hitler)
An artsy study filmed in a style similar to reality-TV/Dogme about self humiliation, objectification, mutilation and abuse for glamor, commercialism and fame.
It also deals with communication and relationship issues between people who are disconnected from themselves, desperate and empty. A man with a traumatic past
makes porn movies in his house, aided by his male porn-star friend, a desperate female who will do anything for fame, and his lonely, intensely depressed son
who stays in his room while his father engages in depravity. Personalities clash, connect and interact while the porn-making descends into violence, food
fights, out-of-control orgies and vomit. A non-linear, experimental film that makes some interesting, scattered findings but wraps it in a disgusting and
Hole in my Heart, A
Surprisingly experimental and free-wheeling movie from Israel in 1964 that is part Godard, part Fellini stream of consciousness, part silly comedy, part provocative satire.
A man lands in the port of Jaffa amidst much confusion and strange people, embarks onto the land to build a life, and soon finds himself selling lemonade in the desert,
competing with another confused Israeli, and finding treasures in their own imaginations instead. They dream up a woman, start making movies and building settlements,
drawing parellels between fantasy and building a real life throughout the movie. This is all filmed with hyper, jazzy, free-wheeling energy and an improvisational approach
as various movie genres and icons appear, mix chaotically, then are reduced to creative slapstick. Fantasies come to life, real people are made into actors and interviewed about
their views on acting and Israel, constructions turn into musical numbers, violence turns into slapstick, and slapstick turns into serious acting lessons, all poking light fun
at the Zionist collective dream. It's quite hard to describe this one really.
Hole in the Moon
Bergman's second very abstract and somewhat surreal movie is challenging but feels incomplete and flawed no matter how hard you think about it.
A neurotic artist and his wife move to a seemingly deserted island, but the local Baron and his strange friends pop up and upset their lives,
using jokes, strange entertainment and knowledge of the artist's past to play games with the increasingly insane man.
Events written in a journal, ideas sketched on canvas, people that appear, and stories told in the middle of the night may or may not be real,
and his wife, so desperate to connect with her deteriorating husband may get more than she wished for. Bergman seems to touch on themes
of subjective reality, schizophrenia, art, deep connections between man and wife, horror elements like a bird man and a woman who pulls off her face,
and social drama, but that's all he seems to do with them: touch lightly.
Hour of the Wolf
Rob Zombie's homage to Texas Chainsaw Massacre and a slew of other horror movies. Take a healthy dose of TCM,
increase the freak count from 4 to about 50, add much more camp and over-the-top acting by everyone involved,
spice the movie with lots of MTV style editing, jumps to background scenes using various film-stocks a la Natural Born Killers,
and top it with some Tarantino-influenced action scenes and you basically have this cult release. Looks like Rob tried
to squeeze in too much horror entertainment in one go and forgot to make it horrifying.
House of 1000 Corpses
Neil Young and friends on a goofy acid trip that's so messy it feels improvised. There's some kind of a story involving the new grumbling owner of a diner
who tries to make all kinds of changes to make money out of the business while assorted weird characters interact, long after each other and dance.
Hopper is Cracker who feeds his pet raccoon, Young is a dorky mechanic who plays music on his tools, there's a bizarre creature with a doll's head that
talks incoherently, a rich Sheik who goes after the milkman, glowing nuclear plant employees, and suddenly the whole goofy thing dissolves into
concert and weird jam footage of Neil Young, and a travelogue mixed with psychedelia. Definitely a "What the hell did I just see?" movie.
Intriguing Dutch visual piece with no dialogue, with most of the movie consisting of strange magical tricks, slapstick, visual comedy, gags, pantomime
and surrealism as part of the story. Two strange brothers with a penchant for pantomime performance, constantly fiddling with magic props, collecting
dead flies, and falling into pools of water are separated by their family. One is afflicted with sudden strange outbursts that disturb the locals and is
therefore sent to be treated in an insane asylum. The family continues falling apart as the other brother follows his obsessive desire for a magician's
assistant, his fears and a touching loneliness becoming increasingly confusing and surreal. Full of alien visual gags that are played with for their own sake,
like when a moving branch gets in his way in the forest while cannonballs drop. Brings to mind a much more bizarre Tati movie.
Dalí's only movie directed by himself, and a very Dalí'esque homage to the poet Raymond Roussel in the form of a hallucinogenic mockumentary. Dalí describes the
background of a special hallucinogenic huge mushroom that grows in Mongolia and the attempts at retrieving it by an expedition set-up by himself. This is done via
various colorful and LSD-inspired images that is converted into a fantastical journey by a narrative, which then turn out to be something quite unexpected.
Along the way, we get many surprising superimposed and juxtaposed images in the best tradition of Dalí, some meditations on hidden messages in classical paintings,
a work of abstract art that turns out to be Hitler's face, and other various backdoors into Dalí's mind and memories.
Impressions of Upper Mongolia
Notorious for its twisted subject matter, this dark and cynical movie explores human monstrosities but fails to rise above them.
An ex-Nazi with a continuing fetish for torturing young boys finally throws himself off the roof only to find himself dependent on others
and kept alive by an iron lung. A mysterious teenager claiming to be a nurse shows up to take care of him, at first seeming to want revenge but
soon reveals his true intentions: His traumatized, disturbed mind wants to become a powerful monster like the Nazi. So he plays sick and violent games
with his family and brings young boys to the house to slaughter until the final depraved ending. Very well filmed and acted but the writing
wallows in sickness instead of giving us something to think about.
In A Glass Cage
Imagine a Polish 'O Lucky Man' as directed by Ken Russell. A young, naive, headstrong but naive man tries to escape from under his father's conservatism and plans
for his future, and find his own way in Western culture. He is soon lost amidst decadent, pretentious, self-obsessed, nonsense-spouting, deviant artists, fascist military
rulers, under the spell of a cruel and fickle actress, played with by deviant aristocracy, and so on. Everything and everyone is over-the-top and excessive, from the
female sexual predators, to the cartoonish fascist megalomaniac who thinks, for some mystical reason, that he is a Chinese ruler. Absurd wars are fought for no good
reason and power is handed over to the other side at a whim, people are tortured or killed in graphic ways or take part in a wide variety of fetishes and perversions
like something out of Salo, except here it's all absurd and whimsical. Most people are afraid of the impending Chinese invasion wave and each social group spouts their
philosophies and politics but their viewpoints are made absurd by sheer excess. The movie makes its satirical points pretty well, but you have to decide whether to
endure coprophagia, BDSM, a pedophile hunchback, and decapitation during sex to get there.
Satoshi Miki generally makes quirky comedies where anything goes, but this one is off-the-wall and nutty even by his standards. This one involves more of his bizarre and
highly eccentric characters, this time in search of Deathfix, an insect-drug that makes you die temporarily. This plot-device is just an excuse to collect a bunch of weird
people and to very loosely string together a gag a minute, whether it's wacky, silly, idiotic or bad taste. There's a half-man magician, a job that involves tickling old
men, vomit that lights on fire then turns into an omelette, Yakuza that enjoy sadistic knee-wrestling, people invading other people's flashbacks, a nutty drug-addict
straight out of Fear and Loathing, an S&M junk sorting yard, a magical severed monkey arm, a censoring dot that flies in the air when a naked man gets hit by a car,
tough suicide cuts that serve as a grater, and much much more. Mildly entertaining in a very silly way, but not exactly witty to say the least, and he really should
learn from Blier on how to make absurdities with more depth.
Insects Unlisted in the Encyclopedia, The
An experimental film so provocatively surreal, that at times it's a throwback to Dada. In a Godardesque freewheeling, disjointed structure, society is
portrayed as dissociative, superficially civilized and artistic, all covering up violence, animalistic behaviour, power games, etc. and the acceptance of
certain rude behaviours but not others. A woman thinks the world is being taken over by aliens, classical art pieces have their props replaced with
commercial products, a man licks the pavements, skating on ice is juxtaposed with slicing a thigh with skates, hair-washing is juxtaposed with urination,
activities such as sex and intimacy are reduced to a frantic montage of images, strange fetishes, or backed by mentally-invasive sounds, a marriage row
leads a sequence of violence ending with wars, people become cardboard cutouts, live food is sliced, and much more... all interspersed with Godardesque
musings and monologues on people, feminism, psychology, relationships, etc. A dense, somewhat interesting, provocative experiment for fans of Godard.
A disturbing French artsy study on the topic of the self-body dichotomy portrayed by a woman who, in a desperate attempt
to discover the meaning and connection to her body, self-mutilates herself. An accidental gash on her leg which she doesn't feel provokes
a neurotic and obsessive breakdown and search for twistedly sensuous discovery. Some of the questions asked are: Who is in control?
Why does my body misbehave? What's the meaning of etiquette and body language? How am I connected to my body? What if the body is just meat?
Maybe individual body parts have meaning? etc. So this lost woman cuts, bites, stabs, pokes, slashes, eats and tears herself, then tries to keep
ripped flesh around as mementos. A blend of Cronenberg's Crash and La Pianiste, this one is guaranteed to make you squirm or even walk out.
In My Skin
Japanese pornographic exploration of sexual obsession that somehow blurs the line between pornography and art.
A master of a household falls for a possessive, prostitute house girl and things slowly change from
youthful carefree sex to dangerous possessive and obsessive games (strangulation, rape) to the final fatal and shocking ending.
In the Realm of the Senses
Insane entertainment involving a thief and his girlfriend, and their two accomplices (one with a urinating disorder) whom they double-cross.
The thief goes to prison where the warden is queer, likes to play golf on prisoners backs and play with pigeons, and the girl goes to
a gas station convent (huh?) as a nun. A meteor strikes and a piece falls in her soup, making her turn into a creature with a 10-foot talking tongue
that likes to messily tear through people's heads and crack jokes, and her poodles are turned into flaming drag queens who redecorate her place and serve her every whim.
She soon finds a new use or two for the tongue. What does it all add up to? Who knows, but it's certainly distracting!
Strange happenings in a Swedish village causes people and weird animals to appear and disappear, people go insane, see things, or have mysterious
knowledge of the events that all seem to revolve around a dam and some fleshy goo. This starts off as a boring drama with empty characters and weak
acting, it slowly builds the horror filmed with bad lighting and choppy editing for that gritty Riget atmosphere, for a short time it becomes weird
other-wordly half-Lynch half-Kairo horror, then it steers into cheesy sci-fi denouement, and suddenly falls apart in a chaotic free-for-all involving
sci-fi priests in robes, mutating body-snatchers, and super-powers installed via instant gory surgery. There is a potential creepy movie in here but
a mess was created instead.
The notorious true tale of Sada Abe, an ex-prostitute who had a sizzling affair with a married man, then choked him to death and kept his penis as a keepsake allegedly
at his request because he was so obsessed with her, was already told several times in movies, the most famous being 'In the Realm of the Senses'. This latest one
chooses a meta-approach of exploring the story through its near-mythical status, the morbid obsession of society over the story, as well as the archetypical man who falls
for this woman and loses control every time. It does this by repeating the events as experienced by a modern-day provocative photographer who meets a seductive, exhibitionist
woman and feels that he has been with her before. This triggers hallucinations and ghostly apparitions of the past, both parallel stories intertwined through an arthouse filter.
Overlooking the events, is a strange old man who accompanies him through the various scenes of kinks, lusts, and erotically-tinged grotesqueries (ero-guro), that get more and more
bizarre as the movie progresses. The couple are tried in a people's court of absurd white-faced juries and silly judges, carried into the room while they are having sex
on a pedestal. Kinky games are played, S&M is toyed with, an impish fetish-doll-girl giggles and runs in the background in contrast to the more sophisticated and warped
sex that is going on. And things progress somehow to bizarre sex with a severed penis, a surreal birth, and a grotesque transexual performance of strange genitalia and blood.
This one is somewhere in between a kinky pinku, and a surreal arthouse piece.
Johnen: Love of Sada
B&W bizarre homage to German expressionism. The 'story' involves a scheming ruler, and his son and daughter who plot against him while a 'connoisseur'
is sent to find a replacement for his son, but this setup falls away quickly in seemingly random plot developments, as if the writer is on drugs and making
things up as he goes. The visuals are strikingly expressionistic with weird angles and bizarre props such as fish growing out of the ground that serve
as a singing Greek chorus. The plot moves from human archetypes, to murder and detectives, to mad scientist, to prison break, to theological symbolism, etc.
People occasionally break out in song or philosophize nonsensically. Altogether a nonsensical but visually and oddly entertaining flick.
Last Revenge, The
Odd arthouse symbolic movie about class struggle by way of Rear Window starring Mastroianni. Leo is a jaded, tired, unfeeling prince, last in his line, who retires
to his big house in England with an odd assortment of noble supporters. He spies on birds from his window out of boredom, then starts to spy on his poor neighbours
and neighbourhood that has deteriorated into a ghetto with pimps, rapists, and violence. He slowly becomes more involved in their lives and starts to side with their
cause, causing his aristocrat friends to think him mad. The characters are so symbolic that they have become cartoonish, the writing is simplistic, bleeding-heart
political-correctness, and the style and approach of the movie is bizarre, with surreal scenes of aristocrats gorging themselves on food or taking part in nude
water therapy, their chaotic thoughts mumbling aloud in the soundtrack as the prince realizes his entourage is very alien and mad.
Leo the Last
A man trying to make a living making provocative movies, collects a team of acting rejects, desperados, whores, transvestites, an AIDS victim, and other weirdos
to join him as a travelling theatre of entertaining pornography. A mysterious man sees in him potential for much more and seduces him into adding snuff to his
repertoire. So he deteriorates from making satirical zombie sex movies and a surreal movie about a dead pig's head, to performing in front of country folk
acts that include a transvestite who tells a comic-tragedy story about his love for a goat before performing with a horse, and a literal rape of the earth that
refuses to produce wheat. The willing snuff victims are suicidal, mad or desperate to make money for their family, and the locals first laugh, then drive them away,
then sick their abusive law enforcement on them, then gather to mass-rape the troupe which suddenly becomes a giggle-fest when they realize they are passing on
AIDS. In short, this trashy movie explores a deteriorating society of angry tradionalists on one end and amoral criminal capitalists on the other, with the desperate
people in between that give up their morals and dignity to make a buck. But this message is just slapped onto what is basically a slightly more thoughtful and
dramatic John Waters gratuitous shockfest.
Life and Death of a Porno Gang, The
Low-budget, cult, artsy flick about invisible aliens invading an androgynous, bisexual fashion model's
apartment looking for heroin but quickly going for human pheromones during orgasm instead.
Her lovers disappear during orgasm and a German scientist follows these activities obsessively.
Effects that are so bad they're good, and a minimalist electronic score make this into a cult,
weird and darkly funny movie.
One-of-a-kind bizarre French sci-fi. It's like some scenes from a variety of thriller, crime and sci-fi movies were stripped of their back-stories and plots,
jumbled together, and then transported to this weird town of Litan that looks like something out of The Prisoner. There are several ceremonies and games being
performed by many people with strange masks, people suddenly break out into violence, drama, expressions of love, crime, and accidents, or they turn into motionless
statues, or get dissolved in the various waterways by wormy laser-like squiggles in the water. Other people are running around covered in blood, a police chief
never believes anything that is being reported, masked gangs pop out of nowhere, all of these people chasing the two protagonists throughout the movie into caves,
rivers, coffins, various houses and streets, while a scientist performs strange experiments with a comatose boy. Similar to Robbe-Grillet, the feeling and
technicalities of various thrillers and dramas are delivered, but nothing ever makes sense. Intriguing at first, but soon becomes tediously repetitive without
a payoff or development.
Lost Highway psycho-sexual mind-warp, French style, albeit not as weird. A 'model couple''s relationship is shaken a bit when the boss comes for a visit and his wife
creates a scene, then hits on the husband in the office. The husband rejects the offer, but the sexual temptation, and the tension created between new loving couple and
an older, cynical and damaged one, causes a fugue in the movie where you never know what is real. Somebody may or may not be having an affair, may or may not be
interested in the other's spouse, or even may or may not be planning betrayal, abandonment, violence or murder. A lemming appears in the sink plumbing which poses
a mystery of its own, but some mysteries and questions are more easily solvable than others...
The insane are pouring out of the asylums by order of the government while a huge parasitic worm is roaming the sewers of New York mutating people
into monsters. The protagonist is a man with a reading disorder who compulsively reads then destroys words, he falls for his neurotically
affectionate neighbour with a fetish for chewing gum and who works with her hygiene-obsessed mother cleaning up crime-scenes. Add to this a
sex surrogate in training, a horny doctor with a God-complex, a woman who thinks she's Kali, wife of Shiva, mixing sex and death while hearing voices,
and you have one insane movie. The star of the movie is the kinetic cinematography, wacky effects and energetic direction, all resulting in a mindwarp
of an experience similar in effect to Tetsuo. Entertaining and unique cult movie.
Strangely cartoonish satire on Brazilian culture and society. Macunaima is a black man birthed as a grown man from his man-in-drag mother. His jungle/country
friends and family barely tolerate him and his childish ways, so he treks to the big city with some friends. On the way he bathes in a magical fountain that
makes him white, gets romantically entangled with a violent guerrilla woman, clashes with city-folk and people out to trick, pressure or control him, and wages
war with a rich Caligula-like tycoon who keeps naked women in a glass cage and entertains himself with a fatal swimming pool full of body-parts. Other adventures
include a man selling a duck that defecates money, a cannibal-witch of the lake, and an old man who feeds him flesh from his thigh. Deals with racism, a black
inferiority complex, lazy, repressive, corrupt or violent society, and many other things that probably only Brazilians are likely to get. Cartoonishly silly
and absurd surrealism.
With movies like these and the ones of Fredric Hobbs, one simply can't tell the difference between a director's earnest attempts at atmosphere and surrealism,
and mind-warpingly bad film-making and editing. Is the weirdness intended, or just the result of an editor on acid who got his hands on some bad horror? Various members of a
family, whose intentions are never clarified, go to work in a very bizarre carnival populated with an assortment of ghouls, vampires, cannibals, transvestites and dwarfs.
Visitors to the run-down carnival disappear in the middle of rides to serve as food and playthings, or are decapitated on the roller-coaster. There is a lot of wandering
and chasing through the carnival detritus, decrepit grounds and warehouse props, the girl constantly meeting two boyfriends, the vampire-in-training Dr. Blood,
a tarot-card transvestite, and a prophet dwarf, while the ghouls moan and groan in an underground theatre watching old horror films, leading to surreal nights of horror.
Malatesta's Carnival of Blood
Completely off-the-wall cult sleaze item from Australia about a hired detective-cum-assassin who solves his cases by sniffing panties. He seems super-human,
killing all who gets in his way by pulling out various intestines or organs with gory flair, but his Achilles Heel is that can't stop masturbating every time
a seductive, stripping woman appears. When a special nun gets kidnapped by a German elitist looking for a virgin bride and his army of balaclava-wearing slaves,
the nun and the gunman must work together using perversions to get out of their predicament. Features over-the-top nunsploitation, a goat-loving assistant,
a lot of sermonizing and abuse from the bizarre German actor, campy & gory fight scenes, a moody atmosphere, and acid semen.
Masturbating Gunman, The (AKA Masked Avenger Versus Ultra-Villain in the Lair of the Naked Bikini)
A fatally flawed masterpiece that starts as a delicately constructed and acted character study of a
highly neurotic and lonely girl with a lazy eye, a nonchalance for all things gory and twisted, a fetish for perfect body parts
and a glass-enclosed doll for a best friend. Her transition to a psychotic, confident slasher collecting body parts and then back
again is unconvincing, but other than that, this is gripping, gory and disturbing.
French-Canadian bizarre movie that blends together the dark and odd stop-motion animation of Brothers Quay, the industrialist, violent surrealism of Tsukamoto,
and the mystical existentialist atmosphere of Begotten. The setting is a world where skeletal, clay and mechanical beings are in control of humans that run around
following orders covered in strange apparatus. One man seems to be outside the system and he finds an embryo inside a strange bird which is fated to be the start
and end of everything, creating panic amongst the mechanics. Like Begotten, this movie is about the visuals, dark mood, and underlying metaphysics and symbolism
and doesn't develop beyond that. Real actors are mixed with clay stop-motion and animated drawings, there are various strange semi-mechanical creatures and forests,
minimal existential dialogue, and scenes of Quay-like nightmarish imagination, constant scenes of cogs and wheels, and juxtaposed graphic autopsies of a man and a
bird. Almost great.
A movie made by a make-up and set design artist and it shows. The star of this movie is the bizarre sets, gadgets, props and costumes.
In an alternative universe, everything revolves around pipes, tunnels, tubes, and tentacles. The kitchen is full of bizarre appliances,
tentacle food that is chopped and cooked by a portable pipe oven contraption, bruises are removed by a sucking tube, a creature with an eyeball
on a stalk serves as a pet, and so on. The simple plot involves a family who is visited by the father's aggressive boss who promptly tries to seduce
the wife while drooling over the teenage daughter. The atmosphere and dialogue is silly, cheesy, 50s-sitcom, cheery simplicity but the entertainment
is in watching all the inventive eye-candy and quirks. Cult material.
Meet the Hollowheads
Docudrama about the Japanese atrocities in China during WWII in Camp 731 where they developed
biological weapons and experimented on people. The varied and shocking experiments are graphically displayed on screen
including stripping flesh off a woman after a severe case of frostbite, decompression chambers where intestines
burst out of a body and organ harvesting off a young boy who was lured into the camp with smiles. Young soldiers
undergoing training get to draw the line and moralize at times, but the dubbing, lack of fleshed-out characters and
failure to portray the victims as real people make this gruesome movie strangely uninvolving.
Men Behind the Sun
A full-length Russian surreal adaption of the surreal short story by Kafka. The movie sticks to the core of the story for the most part, but also adds some dreams,
physical details and lots of atmosphere, and makes some strange adjustments like turning the guest into a trio of Hasidim. Like the 1987 theatrical and comical
adaptation with Tim Roth, this one correctly has the actor physically simulate a bug without any special effects, enhancing the idea of an ordinary, meek,
meticulous salesman who suddenly realizes he is insignificant, to the horror of his family. Probably the best adapation of this story.
Intriguing and well-made British independent horror. A taxi driver obsessively tracks sightings of a strange woman from another dimension. These soon develop into
scarier things, even affecting his friends who start to unravel with disturbing obsessions. There is psycho-sexual horror and repressed traumas, fantasy-horror
about inter-dimensional dangerous guardians like something out of a Clive Barker novel, reality-bending horror reminiscent of Jacob's Ladder, psychosomatic mutations
like something out of Cronenberg's Rabid, and a very strange alter-ego erotic human with a unique fleshy body that made me think of themes from Possession. But
despite all these comparisons, this movie is one of those rare breeds: a unique creation. I didn't find the logic of the dimensional beings well thought out,
and the psychological aspects are simplistic, and I felt these flaws were enough to disappoint in an otherwise intriguing psycho-horror movie.
Spanish offbeat comedy that constantly crosses the border between Jeunet-Caro oddball magic and a stupidly crude wild cartoon. P. Tinto comes from
a long line of P. Tintos, is confused by how many Gods there are in Christianity, is set to inherit the wafer-factory from his father, and wants a
large family of his own. His blind girlfriend who likes frogs and P. Tinto set out to learn about making babies and discover all kinds of tricks except some
basics. They set-up house, and decades later are rewarded with hungry, selfish, time-traveling, crash-landed midget aliens as children whom they adopt. Their
'real' child soon joins them as a brooding, angry giant from an insane asylum. Non-stop inventive visuals, gags and jokes, but as mentioned, they range from
hilarious, surprising and gentle to downright stupid, mean or bawdy. The comedy can be inventively entertaining one minute, and too idiotic, crude or obvious
the next. Definitely entertaining, but a very mixed bag. This needed more sophistication to be included with Jeunet-Caro classics.
Miracle of P. Tinto, The
Surreal Slovakian movie from the new-wave Cold War era that is quite inscrutable, artsy and challenging, but seems to be about art as a clash of imaginative,
passionate inspiration vs. more practical and cold concerns. Anabella is a woman who becomes an instant source of obsession amongst the local men and artists.
They each expect her to fulfill their fantasies, to approve and inspire their art, and so on, while she just wants her official documents to be put in order.
She is maddeningly seductive, flirty, yet also indifferent to their passionate or lustful moves on her. The surrealism flows with the movie with smooth technique
and surprisingly fleeting strangeness, making the whole experience a constantly hallucinative experience. A lion appears in her room but she just plays with him,
there is a tree-phone, a war hovers in the background as if it belongs to another world, there a chandelier in an underground bunker, a feathered hand, a crow,
a magical mirror... A man commercializes his art to make 'death masks' for a price, threatens to put nose hair into a statue, and wants to use his talent to help
Anabella. A woman falls in the sewer in absurd symbolism, and an old woman wants to drown her cat out of kindness, leading to a morally provocative meditation.
Altogether, a challengingly surreal and poetic movie but but not-quite-satisfying and cohesive in its themes.
Tarkovsky explores his own psyche and memories in another meditative and slow movie. Memories of his childhood and his mother mix with personal discussions
with his wife (both acted by the same person), interspersed with poetry readings and historical images of Russia. There is no narrative, only random scenes
connected only in Tarkovsky's mind, including images of his mother at work in a printing shop, his mother sitting on a fence flirting with a passerby,
military training of children, pastoral scenes, beautiful elemental scenes of wind, fire and water, etc. The memories frequently slide into slightly
surreal and aimless daydreams, with bizarre touches altered by memory and mind such as the hypnotic imagery of his mother washing her hair as the house
comes crumbling down in a downpour, or a levitating sleeping woman. Sometimes as self-indulgent as a Fellini movie, a bit of Bergmanesque introspection,
and the symbolism and poetry border on the pretentious, but there's always a magical Tarkovsky meditative atmosphere.
By the makers of Mondo Cane comes a very fitting fictional project that takes the theme of Voltaire's Candide about a young, happy, optimistic man who roams
the world and tries to reconcile the world's various madnesses with his outlook. Like the mondo movies, this is a series of outrageous vignettes,
only this time not limited to reality and is full of bizarre imagery, absurdities, exaggerated social customs and provocative satire. Some of the
scenes include soldiers who bite through barbed wire and have their armor nailed into their bodies, some Tinto Brass-esque sexual romps, a woman with
three breasts, people who strap angel wings onto their young men as they jump off a cliff, 17th century cardboard soldiers wiped out by modern military,
a dwarf rapist, a dance sequence set to synchronized inquisition tortures that convert women into cardboard cutouts, and much more. Mid-way, Candido is
transported to modern New York, and to some naked, fighting, female, Israeli soldiers, and it starts feeling more like a Mondo. Often brings to mind a
funny Holy Mountain or Fellini and perhaps Ken Russell. Rich, wacky, raunchy and entertaining.
Amidst the slew of exploitative cannibal movies in the 70s came this attempt at quality. Cannibal movies
as a rule offer gory, real animal deaths, nudity, nasty human gore, and a plot involving amoral white people
who turn into violent animals in the jungle only to rapidly find out that cannibals can easily outdo them in the nasty department.
This one is no exception but it's relatively tamer, the direction and acting is adequate (no dubbing!)
and the scenery is gorgeous. That doesn't elevate it above the exploitation genre however and it zooms in on
animals getting torn and eaten, bloody deaths and castration, sex with a pig, and Ursula Andress's naked body.
Mountain of the Cannibal God, The
Brian De Palma's first movie is a very odd, confusing but mostly unrewarding experiment. There's a story about a film-maker who is making an exploitative movie
and photo-biographies of girls, a girl who falls in love with him, and both of their friends and acquaintances, many of whom at different times seem to be murdering
somebody else on a whim, only to have the movie change the story or pull the rug out from under your feet in different ways. Scenes become scenes in an inner movie,
screen tests become real as the girls react to being exploited by both the film-maker in the movie and by De Palma, there are confusing switcheroos between a real
and a fake ice pick used as a murder weapon, and a bizarre slapstick silent clown-character who keeps pouncing on people to mock-murder them, or is it really fake?
Structurally experimental and purposely confusing with nods to Godard, often feeling like a joke movie, but that's all this has to offer.
Murder à la Mod
A near stream-of-consciousness, hodgepodge of impressionist scenes on some emerging elements from the turn of the 20th century such as electricity,
the telegraph, and feminism. The main thread is shown in snippets and shows separated identical twins, one leading a life of a flirty prostitute thief,
the other a demure, mostly submissive woman who gets caught up in a revolution with fliers and bombs. They meet the same man who is confused
by the change of character, this symbolic duality touched on, as well as some archaic chauvinistic lectures and feminist rants, and showy scenes of
impractical uses for emerging technologies, a talking cosmos, the inner thoughts of a woman and a chimpanzee, and the adventures of a wired dog.
Some moments are artistically interesting, but overall, this is whimsical and empty.
My Twentieth Century
A unique arthouse movie that is part slow, atmospheric fantasy, part surreal fable, part pretentious art straining to find meaning, part delicate and bizarre comedy.
Northfork is a dying town scheduled for evacuation before the impending man-made flood caused by a dam. It is now only populated by some hardcore citizens too attached
to their land, including a religious man who built himself a Noah's Ark and collected two wives, as well as a priest who is taking care of a very sick young boy.
You are never quite sure how much is in the boy's mind, the cinematography and writing drawing parallels and puns between its various themes and plotlines, which
include death, angels, the slow, delicate death of a dream, faith, the evacuation of a town by a troupe of black-clad hired men compared to the evacuation of a young boy's
soul by a group of lost and quirky angels. Other details include angel wings that the men give away to people they 'save', Hannah as an androgynous parent-angel,
a dog-creature on stilts, missing walls, and a bizarre serious game of guessing today's leftover food at a diner straight out of a Lynch movie. Unfortunately, it
all strains for meaning but never finds any, and all we are left with is an enigmatic, atmospheric, painfully slow but magical piece of work with its heart and mind
just out of reach.
A male doctor and a woman find themselves in a strange castle after a car accident where reality and time have no meaning and a strange man presides.
This is as far as the story goes and we are then treated to random scenes of sex, colors, camera-shaking, living paintings, multiple characters with
the same face, alternate personas, a horribly fake toy spider that tries to eat a woman, pseudo-philosophy nonsense, day and night lose their meaning,
and yes, we have nudity and Satan. Trippy horror-sleaze that's so bad it's entertaining.
Nude for Satan
Not really understandable without subtitles and it isn't fair to review it without them, but here goes anyways: This is a Brazilian surreal movie about the land-wars
in the 1930s. There's a terribly disfigured and scarred hero with a plan who gets involved in the battles, there is sudden violence, confrontations and bloody knife fights,
a strange group of people in the forest that either act dead or perform strange rituals with a psychedelic soundtrack, there's what seems to be a forest nymph, both rich
people with opulent masses of food, and poor people in squalid houses who get caught in the fight, and random white-faced people or soldiers. The camera work is very
dynamic and carefully framed. For more on the meaning and plot, you will need subtitles or knowledge of Portuguese.
Of Gods and the Undead
A sequel to the Teruo Ishii Tokugawa torture series. An endless barrage of disturbing tales of imaginative torture, sadism and cruelty
in Japan in the 17th century. The first half tells the tale of a samurai who falls in love with a local Christian girl until his cruel
shogun finds out. Intercut with gentle love and sex scenes are a wide variety of brutal torture and rape scenes including foot smashing,
burning the eyes of a little girl, cooking of live humans, and splitting a woman into three pieces by oxen. The second half inappropriately
mixes comedy with its tale of forced prostition and slave labor with plenty more cruel scenes of forced abortion, amputation with blunt
knives, etc, etc. The high production values, good story-telling and great acting mixed with this endless brutality will make your jaw drop.
Oxen Split Torturing (AKA Shogun's Sadism)
An anime about dreams by Satoshi Kon. A company has invented a dream machine as a psychological tool that allows people to view, record and enter
other people's dreams. A thief steals the machine and uses it for evil. Not an original concept, and the writing is typically undisciplined as with
most anime, neither explaining nor delineating the machine's capabilities and its rules, thus allowing the animator to just play with dreams in whatever
way he sees fit. People enter and exit dreams on a whim, dreams merge, morph, are dominated by one character and then another without logic or reason,
the effects of a dream on a person are never clear, there is a woman who becomes a kind of dream superhero, and there is even collective dreaming. The
bizarre visuals and dream-logic are the stars of this one, with constantly inventive warping of reality in a world where anything can happen, but don't
expect a satisfying or coherent movie.
A dark but fun surreal horror film by Juraj Herz, and his most challenging movie in this genre. A man stuck in traffic during horrible weather where
everything seems to be getting worse, runs out of his car into the nearest shopping mall and follows a mysterious little girl into a labyrinth of social
hell. He meets a variety of eccentric, pretentious, materialistic people, and their behaviour becomes increasingly strange, deceitful and disturbing.
One of them is an old man who keeps a young woman, who likes to walk around naked, as a pet, and he meets an old dead friend. He also bumps into death
in the form of a sexy prostitute who kills her clients with the wildest bathroom sex you are likely to see. She has an alternate identity as a flower
seller, and tries to seduce our wary protagonist. He soon gets caught up in the web of lies, strange games and apathetic murder, he trades his ID for
a master-key to all the doors in this purgatory, and reality starts getting more and more confusing as his previous life and actions are seen as
a movie and he is strangely unable to leave the mall, leading to a twist ending.
A deliciously wicked, hilarious sleaze-fest of a horror movie about a teenager with a very extreme female version of vagina dentata.
A psychological fear causes her insatiable vagina to devour men who have sex with her so that only their clothes and condom remain.
Matters aren't made easier by the fact that she is very attractive and almost every single man she meets wants to molest or deviously trick her into
sexual intercourse. She soon learns how to live a jaded life with her evil genitals however. Add to the mix a virginal moron
with a crush on her, and female siamese twins, one slutty and the other a virgin, and you have one entertainingly twisted release.
Satoshi Kon's anime on pop-idol celebrity, by way of the woman-loses-her-grip-on-reality genre, gradually and increasingly plays with your mind and psychological-mystery
cliches. A pop-idol decides to quit and switch to acting, but her pop-idol persona seems to take on a life of its own. A web site has intimate knowledge about her and features
posts that seem to come from her, she hallucinates her public persona, and when murders are committed, the mystery becomes more urgent. The anime just keeps switching from one
reality to another for maximum confusion: Is it her acting role? Or a role within a role? Her repressed memories? Supernatural causes? A stalker? A crazed fan? Her close friends?
Just when it seems to resolve the mystery, it sweeps the rug out from under your feet again, but it doesn't even try to explain how all of these solutions could emerge from
anything except her madness, so it loses its grip on the audience.
Obscure Russian surreal piece by Yuri Kiyashko and art direction by Sokurov. A man finds himself walking in a desert landscape with bugles in the sand, carrying a pig
and following other well-dressed people on a desperate trek to... somewhere. Other nightmarish and symbolic images popup in surreal fashion as he tries to make sense
of where he is and how things work, including a little girl with a deadly tricycle, a ball of cord in a bird cage, bizarre hallucinative images in the skies, strange men
with machinery and an eccentric seductive woman. People dress him up and prepare him for a melodramatic threatrical production, but who is it for? Metaphorical,
atmospheric and somewhat intriguing.
Very off-the-wall comedy about Mormonism and an alien invasion that is somewhat endearing in its low-budget earnest silliness, like Utah's version of Liquid Sky.
One never knows what is about to happen next with this quirky film: A sexually repressed young woman uncovers secrets about a hidden book written by her neighbour's
great grandfather about the link between Mormons and an alien plot. Mormon founder Brigham Young's 28th wife seems to have been a feminist alien from a planet Colob
(you know, the planet where God lives), and the plot also includes bees, some Masonic hand signals, and a plaque. Trouble is, she keeps getting distracted by her
neighbour who dances in his shorts, and her brother is getting alien signals after being locked up and treated with electricity for panty-sniffing and pedophiliac
urges. There are many satirical Mormon references, Karen Black has a musical number as a singing alien, there's a Rocky Horror type dance in a costume club, erotic
dreams about angels on flying motorcycles, and more.
Plan 10 from Outer Space
Some movies live in their own world with their own logic, and this is definitely one of them. James is a failing mime in a world where being a mime is a religion and a way of life
run by a grand master. He looks for other careers, such as being a bad guy, seeking the help of his popular bad-guy room-mate Frank who recites howlingly bad poetry to an adoring
crowd. He also seeks the guidance of a nun who joined the convent for its fringe benefits. Ruth is Frank's insane convict sister with scary eyebrows who has the hots for James.
There's also a masked Corduroy Boy who is considered to be the Messiah, and a retarded Golden White Boy on skates who leads a surprising secret life. Will James find his place
in this world? Definitely an entertaining oddity with colorful characters and dialogue, and a must-see once.
One of Pasolini's most abstract and difficult movies that mixes his earthy, violent style with artsy, intellectual obscurity. A son of a German industrialist
represents the confusion and non-conformism of individualism, and neither agrees nor disagrees with his parents and a girl with ideologies. He has flings with pigs
(a symbol for something or another) while trying to avoid being devoured by conformism and relationships. A violent, intercut story of a cannibal in medieval times
seems to interwine symbolically with the intellectual exploration of individualism and is contrasted with modern, dehumanized ideas of a Nazi, etc. Mediocre
Rare, surreal, often criticised Christ-allegory by Pier Carpi. A poor man from the provinces aspires to become a detective in the big city, He is challenged by a rich man
to track down proof for the existence of God. His life starts mirroring the life of Christ, preaching to or rebuking church-goers or other groups of people, embracing the
downtrodden (orphans or prostitutes), walking around in torn rags, hounded by the law and people in power, searching for the truth, collecting followers until his final
suffering, all transformed to fit into this alternative pseudo-modern world with very heavy-handed symbolism and recreations of Christian imagery like the Last Supper, his
Virgin Mary-like mother, etc. The production design is an imaginative and curious mix of medieval, artsy, surreal and futuristic, sometimes reminiscent of Fellini when it
gets a tad delirious.
Delirious Brazilian Surrealism and an allegory for everything and the kitchen sink. Two revolutionary socialists on their way to some utopian destination try to find their way
with a radio and a map, but lose their way in a church. They encounter a woman who first appears in a surreal dream as a Mary-like apparition amidst a chaotic civilization taking
an airplane ride while lying in nature. She changes frequently to different archetypes, from a sex symbol, to the mother of their children, to a guide, to a feminist voodoo
priestess, etc. They try to escape the world of fascists that managed to install torture and death devices even inside the church, a corrupt, a violent church drinking the
blood of Mary, the depraved powers-that-be, and caricatures of brainless, spoiled bourgeoise racists. One of them tries to take over the church and lead the people by becoming
a Christ-like leader, clashing with everyone, including his symbolically diseased friend that wants to continue in the ways of revolution. But they all turn increasingly insane,
building to an insane final half hour of Salo-esque dismemberment, dystopia, and chaos.
A crazy Russian arthouse road-trip movie with heavy use of magical realism and symbolism. If that summary is hard to digest, wait until you hear the description:
A father, his little boy, a friend and an old train engineer hijack a train and a mountain of coal by manipulation and child labor, and go on a trip to the southern
Russian steppes to try and make something of the coal. They encounter a variety of strange, absurd and downright bizarre adventures, many of them symbolic, while
the father tells horrific tales to the son about his mother and the various deaths she encountered. The boy imagines himself saving her in delightful sequences
of surreal childish imagination, and their various discussions and encounters are paralleled with bizarre, symbolic performances by circus folk, like the sexual teasing of
a lion, fish-juggling and a dog-sex act. Like all road-movies, they are haunted by their pasts, failures, relationship issues and so on, and all of their encounters are there
to develop the characters and random ruminations, even if they include cannibalistic school children, strange bartering rules for coal, a man who finds happiness in
limb-chopping, a sexpot redhead, a giant thief and some circus performers that perform bizarre acts before victimizing their audience. Richly absurd.
Four artsy and grotesque movies based on Edogawa Rampo's macabre and bizarre mystery stories. First is a nightmarish but pointless short about a man on an
alien landscape envisioning a violent fight between himself and a female as their genders merge. Second is the most conventional, telling a murder mystery
involving lots of mirrors, dead women with melted faces, and a strange, obsessive mirror-maker with a love for S&M sex. The third by Hisayasu Sato is the most
depraved, involving a war veteran with no arms or legs, who can't talk, is deformed, and who is tended to by his insane, dominatrix, sadistic wife who may
or may not have done all this to him. He becomes her Caterpillar, a sex slave for her sadistic impulses, a work of art according to a strange insane
art collector living with her who soon performs his own twisted fantasies on them both. The fourth is a surreal, confusing trip into the insane mind of an obsessive
man with an extreme fear of germs and a nasty rash on his neck from scratching himself all the time. He is infatuated with a celebrity whom he works for as a chauffeur,
but is driven insane by wanting to touch her and his repulsions. He soon finds a solution but things get complicated when she starts to rot...
A female exploration of the sexual coming of age of a 15 year old girl. Explored are the girl's disgust and fascination with her sexuality
and her strange fantasies, dreams and experimental sexual games. Interactions with parents and local men serve as vignettes for the
roller-coaster of confusing lusts. A hunk ignores her so she dreams of him putting worms on her crotch, she flirts with men
but quickly gets disappointed or shocked by perverts, and she plays with her body and underwear in very twisted yet innocent ways.
Real Young Girl, A
Exploitation horror on LSD and possibly the most confusing movie ever made. The plot involves a woman burned as a witch
with a hole in her chest, a cult trying to bring her back to life with hearts of virgins, a vampire, a staring, giggling hunchback,
a castle party with eccentric guests, and many other incoherent pieces put together with choppy editing, lots of nudity, histrionic acting,
trippy colors, costumes and low-budget set designs, and a plot that jumps from one strangely out-of-place scene to another
without a care for continuity issues such as night and day and consistent clothing. Terrible, but has to be seen to be believed.
Reincarnation of Isabel, The
A studiedly quirky and strange world of an idiot-savant who lives and works at a Prop House, a big warehouse full of props. His only contact with the world
outside is in the cinema where he watches cheesy romance movies, and occasionally he catches glimpses of a 'movie' through the neighbour's windows. When
a pretty production designer with bizarre requests for props comes to the warehouse, he becomes infatuated with her and is willing to do anything to fulfill
her requests, and slowly his reality starts collapsing. Features striking visuals involving props and masks, Svankmajer-like animations as pieces of props
come to life, some black humor, and a strange old couple that likes to dance, and beat each other up with a prosthetic or baseball bat. Slightly undeveloped
writing and it seems to be holding back most of the time, but the good acting, idea and atmosphere makes this a must-see at least once.
Experimental and grim Australian movie about a semi-functional autistic girl with a hellish life made worse by nightmares. Except that everyone in this movie is
over-the-top damaged, annoying, insane, or practically psychotic, especially the men, who all seem to be cartoonishly crude and aggressive perverts. There is incest,
a randomly abusive and insane father, a man-hating, manipulative, and emotionally abusive mother, an animal of a boyfriend/husband, and a slew of malignant strangers.
And that is the main flaw of this movie: Constant nastiness for its own sake. But the cinematography and atmosphere may still make this worth a watch, with gritty, patchy
nightmares involving zombies, a gory, surreal abortion, and other random violence meshing with her damaged memories and confused thoughts, with her life shown
using confused paralellism and emotional highlights warped by her damaged mind.
Another metaphysical Tarkovsky-esque apocalyptic parable by Lopushansky, this one mostly dreary, heavy and murky. The world is ending or has ended, but everyone has time
for one last burst of humanity, or act of madness as it may seem. The protagonist suddenly gets the idea that he has to save some children from the flood as his last act of humanity,
but everyone ignores him, or thinks he is just performing, praising him for his passionate oratory. The military and leadership has been reduced to absurd improvised rules,
the people are massing around the church or in the streets, some inexplicably turning into a medieval mob or army, until it turns out to be another performance, and Gorbachev
appears as a janitor. I didn't get much out of this movie and the symbolism seems heavy-handed, but the atmosphere and existential angst is palpable.
A sloppy script that can't decide what it wants to be. A reporter for a tabloid/newspaper of the bizarre takes time off photographing three-legged drag queens
to investigate strange occurences and disappearances in a village. The mysteries keep getting more convoluted as he starts to uncover secrets amidst the strange
and unwelcoming habitants. The movie starts as a ghost horror movie with twilight-zone pretensions, shifts to Lynchian odd characters, dark sleazy mysteries
and bizarre dream-sequences with a Down's syndrome man and his all-knowing stuffed toy, then it decides to be a mad scientist movie with sprinklings of
Yuzna-esque gore, then a love story and an existential art movie, with almost none of these elements being developed satisfactorily.
Saint Martyrs of the Damned
A challenging and much more surreal creation by Michel Gondry. Whereas Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind used touches of surrealism and a non-linear screenplay to
slowly uncover a story and insights about memory, this movie dives into the surreal for its own sake and as a study of a schizophrenic. The trouble is, the overly cute and
quirky set designs and the feel of the movie is of a romantic comedy, making the increasingly distasteful protagonist a difficult case to swallow and unbalancing
the movie. Stephane can't tell reality from his dream-world anymore, the movie constantly switching between his dreary new job and attempts at getting close with the girl
next door, a city that is a swimming pool populated by animated stop-motion objects that look like primary-school handcrafted projects, and the inside of his mind which
is built from egg-cartons and which re-evaluates everything he sees through defense mechanisms and flights of fantasy. Very interesting, and often magical with touches
of comedy, but feels half-baked and lacking focus.
Science of Sleep, The
Provocative and surreal Mexican 45 minute movie. Animals are slaughtered graphically or lassoed, only for the animals to turn into humans, while apathetic lovers
make out in the background. An endless string of fast-food sausages slides through the city over all industrial and city life, budding child priests fake the crucifixion
then bash older priests off their climbing frame, a dead man is carried on bags of flour, some poetic existential whining serves as narration, etc. I'm not sure
what it all means but it delivers somewhat interesting provocations nevertheless.
Secret Formula, The
Dennis Potter wrote and directed this slightly underrated flop. Whereas his Singing Detective series used some mental fugues and fantasies as part of interweaving
narratives, this movie is pure stream of consciousness madness that doesn't provide any answers until the end. A man on a train is lost in a mental fugue and doesn't
seem to know who he is, he thinks of his troubled relationship with his wife, whom he may have killed, or who may be a prostitute, or who may be having an affair,
or who may be going mad herself. These variations flow from one to another with elements and characters from one layer appearing in different forms in another.
There is more of Potter's dark deep psychological drama and misanthropy, exploring a dark character with sexual problems on the verge of madness. An interesting experiment.
Soavi, a talented horror director slowly finding his way, rips off Rosemary's Baby and creates a creepy world where a world-wide
Satanic sect is building momentum, sacrificing children and waiting for the birth of ... something or another. Along the way,
evil bugs are inserted in people's nostrils where they lay their young to feed on the brain, one woman's face is literally ripped off
in a ritual and used for resurrection, a stork mounts a lady and eats worms out of her neck, rabbits turn out to be quite adept at switching
TV channels with a remote and other inexplicable events occur. Cult material, if not for the stupid ending.
Demented French backwoods-horror black comedy. A group of annoyingly idiotic, over-sexed, partying teenagers accept an invitation from a sexy girl
to come visit her country home and get more than they bargained for with the local inbred lunatics, one of which has some kind of pact with Satan
and is after more than just their company. Very well-done, chaotic but trashy Euro-entertainment, with superb performances (especially a demented one by Cassel).
Must-see at least once but fatally flawed by the fact that two thirds of the movie deals with the antics of the horny teenagers.
A collection of five shorts from an unusual and eclectic UK film-maker. 'Paranoid' is an early, rough stop-motion piece that builds on dread, involving a grotesque
humanoid figure in a room who is afraid of clocks and worms. 'The Man in the Lower-Left Hand Corner of the Photograph' is the best and most striking piece in the set:
A grotesque and diseased-looking stop-motion piece on loneliness with an old man, his photograph and a pet worm, who spies on his suicidal neighbour with unexpectedly
grotesque results. 'The Cat with Hands' is a four minute unusual and creepy horror piece about a cat that steals body parts. 'The Separation' (also on Small Gauge Trauma)
uses that mainstay of creepy horror: Conjoined twins, separated, and now lonely and yearning for each other, their experiments warped into something disturbing. The final
short film 'Monsters', is a live-action piece on sibling violence taken too far, paralleled with gory nightmares about a madman on the loose from the local insane
asylum triggered by a decapitated goose head. All in all, a must-see for fans of dark, grotesque horror, although not all are compelling and it could use a couple
Short Films of Robert Morgan
This is what you would get if you mix the demented and perverse sex from Thundercrack with film-noir and some John Waters trash.
The plot concerns an insane girl and a demented hermaphrodite whom she calls her mother, and together they kill maids and play
perverse sexual games and roleplays until a detective comes looking for a missing girl and falls into their hands. But the plot
is just another ingredient for the insanity as we never figure out who is really who and what their motivations are. Normally
I would just categorize this as pointlessly bizarre and twisted, seeing as it involves insane people having vomit sex, food sex, a golden
shower while being electrocuted, hermaphrodite sex, a touch of confusing gore, and rape with a knife. But the performances here
are so gripping, convincing and amusing in an insane way you could swear the actresses were recruited from a real mental ward. For the twisted only.
A raunchy Wodehouse-esque British comedy mixed with Monty Python and some drugs. This unique oddity was based on a radio show which revolved around
colorful use of language, wordplay, wit and very British absurdities. There isn't much of a narrative that one can follow, the chaotic comedy revolving
around many eccentric characters who say things like: 'If filthy fingers were trumps, what a splendid hand you'd have', rant to their maid that
'I don't know what I want but I want it now!', have monologues that include 'The trouble with Italian airplanes is that their wings are too hairy'
and makes jokes like: 'How dare you belch before my wife!' 'I'm sorry, I didn't know it was her turn'. The wit often includes subtle bad taste
('Generally speaking when I eat something I don't want to see it again'), and the characters occupy themselves with random activities like
riding a unicycle wearing a tutu and blackface, cutting up Reader's Digests with a stuffed animal's antlers, playing billiards on a horse,
and practice shooting at fake parachutists. The movie also involves a ghost that speaks to a dead mother and takes a stuffed dog out for a walk
to urinate, a man who entertains by pretending to be a chicken and eating maggots, and a climax with seance, swords and body parts. Incoherent,
Sir Henry at Rawlinson End
This would be the mutant result if you crossed Texas Chainsaw Massacre with Troma. A family is stranded in the backwoods and are soon chopped up
or kidnapped by a genetically mutated family from hell. There's a slashing monster with metal jaws, a midget that throws plates, a silly man
with a huge brain, a headless muscle-man, a deceptively nice grandmother (of course), and a group of Hell's Angels type senior citzens.
It's all played for silly and weird laughs, the over-the-top gore is too brief to get top billing, and included are some very strange scenes
like when a man's brain is torn open and letter-blocks crawl out of his head to form the word "Love". And where else can you see an 80 year old man
have a gory fight with a plate-throwing midget?
Anthony Hopkins wrote, directed and starred in this experimental movie. It is a deceptively quiet, light-humored, and chaotic experiment. If you participate
in the movie, there is much to extract from the experience. The movie is basically a slipstream of memories of an actor and writer that uses only pure dream-logic
to tie the pieces together. Thus, characters from a movie he may or may not be writing interchange with people from his real life, memories and scenes drift,
jump-cut, images popup in free association, people from different times and movie-realities drift between scenes that take part in a movie, a movie within a
movie, or in his memories and mind. Subtle hints are dropped but never explored, the mind theorizing on how to tie all of this jumble together but never logically
thinking it through, just like in a dream: Perhaps someone is channeling past lives and memories, perhaps its insanity, a dream, death, etc. Life and death seem absurd,
violence pops up for no good reason, is it all a movie? Killers rant about losing the script, continuity people are killed off by the script and life loses coherency,
an actor literally overacts himself to death, Hopkins seems to be the writer, but he is too passive to be the controlling factor and events in the movie he is writing
spiral out of even his control in a Kaufman-esque mind-pretzel. Is life scripted? Or is it as absurd as the aggressive producer who lives in his world and wrecks
his own movies? Like I said, there is much to actively experience here, but unfortunately it all feels rather whimsical, and more like an old man on a light, experimental
mood that felt like exploring memories while poking fun at all of this endlessly serious movie-making stuff. This movie is the equivalent of a mental fugue attached
to the funny bone, but not to a heart and soul. It's an interesting watch, but for a warmer, deeper instance of this sort of thing, I recommend Providence.
A dark, slow, surreal, and depressing look at humanity and where it's heading. This Swedish movie offers an ultimately bleak collection
of characters and events that depict an extremely alienated, lonely and soulless state of modern society; People that are dead before
they are dead. It is filmed with a blend of visually rich, Gilliamesque art direction and Bunuel surreal mockery and black humor,
and uses a constantly stationary camera to portray the stuck state people are in. Scenes include endless and pointless traffic jams,
a young girl being pushed over a cliff to symbolize the sacrifice of youth, a magician making a mistake and actually sawing into a man,
and other unforgettable visuals like the sea of people overloaded with suitcases at a huge terminal. Visually rich, but pointless.
Songs from the Second Floor
Colorful punk-rocker sci-fi oddity featuring aliens sent to Earth to kill a set number of beatniks and country folk, but updating that to hippies.
Pizza-delivery aliens are stuck on Earth for breaking the rules and get a blood bond with a psychotic repulsive girl who goes on a killing spree
while stripping, making out with other girls and lifting motorcycles. A naked angel with a snake appears every once in a while, as does Guitar Wolf
from Wild Zero complete with laser beam eyes, a zombie grandmother and some incoherent bizarre sequences that make no sense.
Sore Losers, The
Exactly what it sounds like. An ongoing festival produced by travelling producers featuring sick and twisted short animations and who also release video compilations.
The animations are mostly humorous and very short, from seconds to minutes, and focus on gross-outs, gore, depravities, offensive content, plain weird, toilet humor,
sick jokes, twisted fantasies, politically incorrect rants, etc. There are some reoccurring characters and artists such as Joe No Neck and his life's little misadventures
with no neck, Brian's Brain - a kid missing the top of his head, and Lloyd who constantly mutilates himself in gory ways with his clumsiness. The shorts range
from stupid, dull and pointlessly gross, to funny and entertaining, but the fun of these things is in the short gross-outs and the reactions by crowds. The
stand-out artist included often in this festival is of course Bill Plympton.
A cult, low-budget, sci-fi, cyberpunk movie about big brother vs. individualism. There's the powers that be that are all-seeing with the help of technology, led by a strange
decaying leader hooked up to machines, who seems to be slowly turning into one. They discover an individual who is not in the system, and who has strange powers to evade them.
He changes his personality, voice and outward appearance at a flick of a switch and disappears. He preaches pseudo-philosophy that seems more mystical than logical,
and connects with people in strange ways. The movie unravels towards the middle as he develops a relationship with an oddly pushy waitress. He shows people strange surreal
visions that overwhelm various senses, while his own paranoid and bizarre nightmares seem to be taking over his personality. In the meantime, big brother develops more
dependency on complex machinery, including the ability to transfer a personality via a computer. Who will win the battle for humanity and reality? The movie does a lot
with its budget and one can only guess what it could have done with more. This is strictly for people that enjoy weird low-budget movies like Liquid Sky with an
approach, language and personality of their own.
A zombie sex movie that may become a cult item. Matool is a zombie killer who prefers to kill the undead with nine-inch nails.
He's also a horny bastard who tries to get into the pants of girls he rescues. When he runs across a couple who live an 'alternative lifestyle'
despite the post-apocalyptic world around them, things get complicated. This lifestyle includes having sex with anyone that crosses their path,
including a laughably mutated sister in their orgies, and keeping a naked sexy zombie around in case of hormonal emergencies. When more people join them
and tensions rise, things get out of control. An inventive, offbeat, kinky, funny cult movie with the expected gore but for some reason leaves
you unsatisfied due to some flat elements and acting.
Stink of Flesh, The
Japanese schoolgirls are prostituting themselves for money and gifts in a kind of epidemic. One group of psychotic sleazebags working at a porn shop decide to
teach them a lesson by having sex with them, abusing them and not paying. Another couple decide to entice men who go for these schoolgirls and torture them for
being such perverts. When these groups clash, the blood flies. The clash of twisted ideals and sick characters is entertainingly violent and warped, the rest is
extreme sleaze and filth.
Stop the Bitch Campaign
Disgusting sleaze once again, but so bizarre and over-the-top insane that it's entertaining. The abused schoolgirl from part one is back working as a pimp with
a team of schoolgirl whores, all on the look out for her assailant. The psychotic comes back for more abusive fun to teach schoolgirls a lesson, only this time
he's practically super-human and has an obsession with vegetables and his grandpa. Features vegetable rape, over-the-top camp with sleaze, various perversions
including a diaper fetish and one man who likes to be abused while yelling 'Michael' repeatedly, harrassment by a stuffed toy down a man's pants, and random
crazy scenes such as a basement that turns into a disco while the lunatic dances with his dead grandpa. Many vegetables were harmed in the making of this film.
Stop the Bitch Campaign 2
Delightful little Korean animation with a purposely crude and ugly drawing style that creates its own warped and surreal atmosphere. It starts like a quirky children's
fantasy about a timid man who works as an ear cleaner for an ear cleaner company, failing with his customers, and always in search of his sister who once used to clean his ears.
The CEO conspires to make him shrink in order to make him a more efficient ear cleaner by actually climbing into ears. This works, but he discovers that he can go further
into people's heads and witness or help their subconscious fears and secrets, all visualized in pure surreal fashion using strange creatures and psychedelic sets.
Story of Mr. Sorry, The
By far the most experimental and bizarre of Gonzalo Suárez's movies. This take on Faust has a narrator telling us the tale as if it's a bedtime story, backed
by a greek chorus consisting of squeaky voices, against a backdrop of lights as if on an alien spaceship. Faust is after a deep secret, investigating life itself
in books and scientific experiments. Then it rapidly veers into nonsensical sci-fi and mystical strangeness that mixes several classic stories together: The
secret involves a child's drawings, and "beings from an unspecified place in the universe", appearing in oceans wearing gas masks or in a plastic bubble, are
behind everything with complex plots and machinations. There's Margarita, a seductive, very sensuous distraction, who is possessed by the spirit of Helen of
Troy, Faust's ex-wife with whom he had a child who wanted to fly. Mephistopheles is another powerful creation of the beings, sent on a mission to confuse and deal
with Faust, who then gets distracted by Margarita. When characters are introduced, we usually get a delirious scene of strange dancing and rituals accompanied by
avant-garde sounds. For example, Faust's son is shown as a baby bouncing rhythmically in his crib along with a howling dog, then he grows up and performs acrobatic
stunts in a bizarre montage. The experimental cinematography and sound makes an already strange movie even stranger, making ordinary objects bizarre, zooming in
on things like a dissolving tablet in a glass, a giraffes tongue, or squirmy tadpoles in unknown liquids. One-of-a-kind bizarreness.
Strange Case of Doctor Faust, The
In terms of comparisons, think of this as a much more surreal Repulsion, reminiscent of Eraserhead with Svankmajer's gritty textures and objects. A girl moves into a
truly miserable slum-hole of a decrepit, tiny, filthy one-room apartment that looks like a store with windows covered in graffiti and dirt. It still has mountains
of bric-a-brac left-over from the previous tenant, and it may actually contain the previous tenant himself somewhere in its walls. To make matters worse, the girl's
mind is falling apart in claustrophobic and disturbing nightmares, and her doppelganger is born out of her fridge to take over her life and take care of her corpse
while she's out cold. There's a lot of attempts at cleaning, things falling apart to surreal, nightmarish proportions, including bulbs that explode inside flames,
shaking walls and dangerous mixes of electric sockets and leaking water. This is more intriguing Jolley/Reynolds surrealism after their initial shorts, but it feels
like a stretched out short and doesn't develop or satisfy like, say, Eraserhead. They should have released this as a 30 minute short along with Burn. Recommended only
as a rental for people that think they can handle a more impenetrable Eraserhead by way of Repulsion.
What on earth...? I've seen insane movies before but this is just so... alien. Matsumoto's second outing after Big Man Japan starts with two storylines that
eventually are joined, but you will never guess in a million years exactly how. One story is a pedestrian, dull movie about a loser Mexican wrestler on his
way to a fight, his son and a cursing nun. The other features a childish man in pijamas who finds himself in a huge bizarre white room decorated with cherubian penises
which, when pressed, cause a wide variety of objects to appear. He goes through three stages: learning, implementation and future, the first of which takes up most
of the movie as he tries to figure out how to get out of the room and learns how to play the game, then moves on to real and often serious worldwide repercussions
on pressing the penis-buttons, then on to a metaphysical plane. The educational bits are silly, drawn-out, but often hilarious, and the overall interpretation
of the movie as a metaphor for life is up to you. Interesting, utterly unique and great fun, a must see, but too schizophrenic and unsatisfying.
45 minute Estonian surreal animation. This is a bizarre world where postmen have to go through a rigorous and long training programme which includes many physical
challenges and transcendental meditation, until one is chosen to carry a message to the moon. Creature-objects fill the scenery, from a flying pipe-creature,
to an eyeball pet, some kind of sea-creature-pet that keeps announcing stuff, a dog that turns into a naked woman, a matador playing with an animated razor-blade,
and so on. The letter consists of barcodes and must be transferred via telegraph in the most painful way imaginable through a strange world where Hitchcock is scaring
teenagers with his moon-like head. Magically surreal and fascinating, full of symbolism, Freudianisms and the plain bizarre, as long as you don't insist on deriving
concrete meaning from your imagery.
Taevalaul (Sky Song)
Takeshi Kitano's films always had a touch of whimsy. In between violent Yakuza scenes and drama, Kitano would insert artistics images, paintings, dancing, sound,
or make the characters detour into fun and games for almost no reason. In Takeshis', this whimsy is given free reign and is the star of the movie which
seems to be exploring Kitano's world with self-references, merging his cinematic roles and real life in numerous ways. Kitano acts as both a Yakuza-film star
and a regular loser in the street, going to auditions, hounded by fans and strange characters, Yakuzas, bizarre dreams, and elements from his life being used
in his acting roles and vice versa, until you have no idea what is real. The climax of the movie features one absurd gun battle after another, as if saying
that this is what the audience expects of his public persona which he both despises and has fun with at the same time, throwing disparaging remarks
at himself and converting gunshot flashes into star formations. Repetitive, obscure, whimsical, but interesting for Kitano fans.
An obscure movie with great potential for cult following. For starters, the material is based loosely on a short story by William S. Burroughs, and written
and directed by Tom Huckabee, who allegedly bought the film without audio and who then reconstructed the dialogue and filled in his own story. That would explain
at least some of the sync problems and the detached experience. The protagonist is Bill Paxton in an early role, who has several graphic sexual encounters with
brief pronography. The 'story' involves a man who has been experimented on and brainwashed by a group of feminists to kill the leader of a Welsh village
which happens to be a government sponsored community that offers sexual services based on its long history of prostitution. These feminists perform experiments
to do with mind-control, changing of sexual orientation and gender-switching surgery. Billy is convinced that the major is a tiger sent by God to kill him and
is given a mental kill trigger. But then Billy arrives at the village and the rest of the movie is just a series of random atmospheric, psychotropic encounters
backed by an odd soundtrack, audio-recordings of brainwashing and psychological interviews and sexual fantasies, and endless news and radio reports about various
near-apocalyptic events around the world, including a nuclear war, the invasion of the USA, a Christian Democractic State, executions, mutant rats, plagues,
and general anarchy. There are bizarre scenes involving a vulture eating at a man, a strange lip-cutting game with a gender-ambiguous boy, dreamy sexual encounters
and so on. It doesn't really go anywhere, but the experience itself is best handled while under the influence.
Taking Tiger Mountain
Estonian meditative art-film that uses allegory and surrealism to explore the idea of goodness in this life. A man feels alienated when he performs basic
good deeds in a world run by greed, selfishness, violence and ulterior motives. His world becomes increasingly bizarre and unreal, blended with dreams and
literary allusions. He finds dismembered hands in a dark forest, tries to convince a disquietingly perverse and aggressive policeman of what he saw. He is
made to fire people due to a 0.7% profit loss, his wife seems almost alien in her cruelty and infidelity, he dreams of floating female apparitions, has a
conversation with a strangely foreboding and omniscient priest against a backdrop of a fallen crucifix, and when some thugs kidnap his girl and seem
to run things by incomprehensibly reprehensible rules, he starts to lose his moral clarity.
Temptation of St. Tony, The
Another very uneven horror anthology, this one containing six shorts and a wrapper involving Udo Kier as the host in a bizarre mime performance on stage while a horrified
girl looks on. By far the most bizarre of the lot is the last: 'Sweets', where social interactions are expressed via colors and food fetishes. A guy is being dumped
with all the cliches in the book while he eats disgusting leftovers, and she, a cold ice-cream, remembering all the increasingly fetishized and warped food sessions
they shared, leading to a party where the socially weak get their just desserts in a gory climax. 'Vision Stains' is another sick one by Karim Hussain, involving
memories passed on via injected eyeball fluid, leading to extreme eyeball trauma, except it's all illogical and pointlessly gruesome. 'Wet Dreams' by Savini is a
reality-bending gory one about a man who has Freudian dreams involving his penis-chopping wife, who keeps waking up to multiple levels of reality, each more gruesome
and emasculating than the next. 'The Accident' is a good one, but seems like it doesn't belong here, about a woman explaining death to her little girl who witnessed
a fatal car crash. 'I Love You' is the worst one about a pathetic man and a bitchy woman in a fatal love triangle, and 'Mother of Toads' is an ordinary Lovecraftian
horror short involving toad monsters and sex. In short, mostly mediocre or weak, with some highlights.
Theatre Bizarre, The
Artistic nihilism and absurd, surreal comedy on the rat-race and banal lives with useless habits and jobs. Dialog is thrown out in favor of grunts,
gibberish and other animalistic sounds. Themroc gets fired from his job painting half of fences black, so he goes home, throws out all
his possessions and turns his house into a cave, smashing the outside walls and climbing in through a rope. He has incest with his sister, declares war on
confused policemen, and gets his neghbours to join him in this much more satisfactory, bestial life.
A simple story of a man going with his family on an annoying vacation serves as a backdrop for surreal absurdities and nonsense, presumably to explore
the life of a Hungarian in the 80s. After some family tension and sexual problems, the wife develops a strange hair on her face and things fall apart
while he visits relatives and grapples with the various eccentricities of city life. Some examples of scenes and visuals: Neglected dead men in a
cinema, a meeting with his uncle who doesn't recognize him who starts barking beaurocracy which turns into a Western shootout, doors open into bizarre
fantasy scenery, a hotel clerk drills them to fill in a feedback form as soon as they enter the room, brand names pop on screen like capitalist balloons,
a tiny dancing woman in a matchbox, and many more odd tangents, musical pieces and freewheeling scenes. Mostly chaotic, confusingly entertaining at times,
but you probably have to be Hungarian to get anything out of this.
A full-length from Ian Kerkhof, a South-African/Dutch film-maker who usually makes transgressive shorts. An aggressive Dutch man on the run from the Yakuza
is at a wild and desperate end of his rope when he meets a neurotically submissive, real-life porn-star in a bar. They get together through desperate lust
and needs, their psychology explored through flashbacks, horribly pretentious monologues, perversion and censored hardcore sex. The cinematography is all over
the place, using filters, superimpositions, wild movements and colors, but in a raw, gritty way like a Richard Kern movie. A blend of art and hardcore porn that
both studies and revels in perversions and neurotic relationships, and which doesn't really work, but is, nevertheless, somewhat interesting.
I could almost swear this was Guy Maddin making a movie under a pseudonym. This odd indie movie derives pleasure from twisting around the postcard-perfect,
romanticized images and propaganda of the USA during WWII into almost Lynchian deviant, racist and odd behaviour. To that end, it recreates the look of a 1940s noir
complete with amusing news reels, then has its characters deadpan their cursing, obsessions, threesomes with married couples, bigamy, rape, and lots of repressed
(and therefore surreal) gay urges. In fact, it could be argued that most of the subtexts and behaviour in this movie emerges from repressed homosexuality, giving
Enola Gay a new meaning. The story involves two intelligence officers trying to create useful misinformation by building a fake life, letters and back-story around
a dead body, then dropping the body near the Japanese as a kind of information bomb. In the meantime, they partake in their sexual escapades with many women, always
in lifeless and awkward moods, as if in a frustrated search for something else, until the naked dead man appears to come back to life to shake up their psyches.
Even the endless nonsensical encrypted messages and random letters that seem to be everywhere take on a new meaning in a surreal fashion.
Artsy Japanese piece with gritty, grimy textures and strange industrial objects, drawing comparisons to Tsukamoto, but the approach is more atmospheric.
A nurse, and a man with a bizarre contraption attached to his back, wake up in a closed room full of pipes. Parallels are drawn to snails, the man carrying
metaphorical issues on his back as he drifts into hallucinations, while the woman desperately tries to escape through the walls, leading to an artsy, wet
and snail-slimey sex scene. Visually rich and moody art piece.
Tsuburo no Gara
Crazy Japanese Pinku about an uncle who is afraid to sleep and his life turns graudally more outlandish and absurd, descending into a sexual hell. His sleeplessness
is combined with wild sexual lust, and the women are only too happy to acquiesce to his demands for some reason, even his nephew's girlfriend. But his life turns to
an absurd hell, plagued by giant poisonous spiders, a sperm-battle with a snake, squids and tentacles, and an orgy with blood-covered succubus. His nephew and girlfriend
try to save him by negotiating rock/paper/scissors style with the devil and fishing for giant squid. Don't ask me what it all means.
A gentle, tasteful but very surreal and dreamy exploration of the confusing and overwhelming sensual awakening of a young girl who gets her first period.
Sensual curiosity is projected onto friends, relatives and even parents, identities change often, fantasies reach fairy-tale proportions
and confusing fears rear their heads which involve marriage, old age, sex, parental arguments, love, and oedipal conflicts, all
beautifully filmed using confusing allegories of vampires, monsters, witch-burning, mysterious characters, and magical earings.
A magical experience for a while, but then wears out its welcome with too many confusing or meaningless cinematic wanderings.
Valerie and Her Week of Wonders
A head-trip of a movie that deserves to have a cult status on par with Jodorowsky's movies. An older man, a worker of the earth, finds himself trapped in a
cave-in, this starting a sequence of mystical transformations and rituals as he passes through various stages and onto death. The majority of the movie consists
of a hodge-podge of hallucinatory sequences, esoteric rituals and religious mysticism mixing together a variety of sources. He battles through a storm of ashes,
encounters a pulsating egg which births a creature, interacts with a bizarre android guide acted by a skeletal Japanese butoh dancer, performs rituals, one involving
the contribution of blood from his penis, watches a skeleton dance, prays to Mary, is led through water and roots of trees, etc. these scenes interspersed
with memory snippets of his life on earth. On the one hand, I am probably not knowledgeable enough in esoterica to understand what all this means. On the other hand,
I can't help but feel that this is just some personal drug-induced hallucinations and a meaningless salad of mysticism. There is no denying the utterly unique
experience of this movie however.
Bizarre art-piece by Butoh performer Masaki Iwana. Butoh is a strange Japanese dance-cum-performance that is difficult to describe, but it involves very slow movements
in difficult or grotesque positions, some taboo and shocking elements, an encapsulating philosophy, and references to WWII and its after-effects in Japan, wherefrom
it originated. In this movie, a young boy follows a leaflet from an airplane into some decrepit grounds containing a castle populated by a troupe of strange people
afflicted by an uncurable disease and some mutations. They are guarded, and anxiously await gassing by a 'chief' who visits them once a year to make sure they
pass some absurd criteria before approving the gassing. The castle's inhabitants include a failed kamikaze pilot, a calligrapher with glued fingers who uses his
mouth instead, a suicidal prostitute, a strange woman with psychic powers, and a corpse. They perform Butoh, images of the war are glimpsed, there is graphic fellatio
and the insertion of a fist, and they discuss their longings for death. This is the kind of bizarre movie that is neither good nor bad, simply because you don't know
how to digest it.
I don't usually review obscure shorts but these two combine to create a 50 minute experience. Created by Ronny Carlsson from filmbizarro.com and released on DVD
along with some earlier shorts under the name of 'Experimental Films From The Lense of a Shitty Camcorder'. These two shorts dive into the mind of a young man
who has seen one too many sick movies and has created a todo list of sick things to try while wearing a pig mask, like puking on girls and torturing them. He kidnaps
a girl, performs various nasty tortures August-Underground style, which alone wouldn't be interesting, but then My Monster dives deeper into his mind using surrealism,
exploring his warped feelings for the girl he tortured, his disturbed mind overrun by the TV, leading to a scene where he jams the TV socket into his arm. All of this
is filmed using avant-garde, gritty, and experimental cinematography with numerous color filters, grainy footage, hand-held cameras, strange random imagery, etc. all creating
a celluloid and grainy TV world of sick, Videodrome-esque mind-reality permanently damaged by movies.
Video Geisteskrank/My Monster
Lopushansky is no stranger to sci-fi, using it often like Tarkovsky as metaphor, backdrop or metaphysical introspection, but in this case he just goes
for a surreal, fantasy world. Like Stalker, this is mostly a strange, religious, existential meditation. In this world, a man is on a quest to visit
a mythical underwater museum in between the tides. To get there he must pass through a town that is basically a big garbage dump, which the materialists
there see as the produce of humankind. While this handful of snobbish atheists party, the rest of the masses, which consists of the mentally challenged,
the ugly, and the midgets, pray at their monastery to 'let them out of here'. The masses are prone to religious hysteria and irrational fears, while the
rational handful try to train them as servants for their materialistic needs and social rules. The religious symbolism involving redemption, Jesus, etc
is heavy-handed and the allegory is a touch too simplistic, but the imagery is strong and the atmosphere is unique.
Visitor of a Museum
Cult classic about a Christian policeman that comes to an island inhabited by Pagans in search of a missing girl,
and finds a lot more than he expected. This one is erotic, chilling and offers an unsettling look into Pagan
lifestyles complete with long musical episodes where the folk dance and sing joyously while committing
primitive or brutal acts. Unforgettable.
Reclusive, eccentric, twin sisters have been collecting trash for decades, their house literally covered in bric-a-brac both inside and out. When they find
a big pile of red wool, their lives are invaded by a strange girl who obsessively re-knits her red dress over and over, while yelling in multiple
other-worldly voices. Various inanimate articles around the house declare war on the girl and a mess ensues. Doll-houses and wool bring up childhood memories
of mother and first love as the movie and flashbacks weave together. Lots of wool is knitted, knitting is seen a method of getting pregnant, dolls act out
the flashbacks, there's a river of wool, random musical pieces and chaotic animations, and more wool. Gentle, unusual, weird and interesting but whimsical.
If I were to name-drop for this one, I suppose the closest thing I can think of is Repulsion as directed by Lynch collaborating with Ryan Nicholson. This is a surreal,
mind-warping, emotionally intense and nasty movie that succeeds in creating a mental portrait of a deeply disturbed woman with a nasty psychological wound, but is also
gratuitously nasty as well as bizarre. You will never know how much is real in this movie, and exactly how much of it is in her mind. A past trauma of rape-incest coupled
with a pregnancy at 14, which may or may not have been stillborn, plagues this woman, causing anything from images of her castrating her father in gory detail, to
desperate S&M roleplaying with a dominant male, to emotional psychotic breakdowns, to the haunting of her goth daughter who may or may not be real and needs
her help with a rape-wound of her own. Amidst this neurotic mess, other surreal images insert themselves involving a warped birth of full-grown twins, licking
of menstrual blood, and an obsessive collection of excrement that gets psychologically tied in with her trauma. Not a complete waste of time as with other movies
of this type, but you have to know what you are getting into.
Bizarre alien horror movie about an abductee who returns three years later in alien form in order to abduct his son. He goes through several
transformations, one of them by impregnating a woman through her mouth and gorily emerging a short while later as a full grown male. He transforms his son by sucking
on his shoulder, who then joins him in bizarre activities like melting phones, creating a killer midget clown and stuffing the babysitter into a cocoon so that she can lay eggs.
No, this movie does not make any sense.
Bonkers Japanese comedy that feels like one of those energetic Japanese comedy duos that feed off each other's silly and wacky non-sequiturs. The whole movie
is basically one wildly, impulsive, inventive gag after another which are much more silly than witty. Yaji and the drug-addict Kita are a gay couple on a road
trip from medieval Edo complete with period costumes with flamboyantly gay colors. Hallucinations, dream-sequences and gags include: Bodies on a river turning
into a Tetris game, elastic testicles, deadly stand-up comedy trials, a 'face-tumor' which grows as a clone of your partner's head on your arm, a samurai procession
turning into a parade of half-naked samba dancers and toy tanks, numerous technological anachronisms in a medieval setting, sudden bursts of gay dance and music,
a drag-queen sex-change surgeon, an old lady that serves as a radio, a King Arthur that squeezes yam out of his fists, a bartender's wife who grows mushrooms on
her body, a giant, farting human source of the river Styx, and much more. Fun, but too random to be truly entertaining.
Yaji and Kita: The Midnight Pilgrims
Odd, fragmented Canadian indie movie exploring the mind of Faustus, a weak-willed bureaucrat in the Education Ministry slowly going insane. He has violent fantasies
about his annoying co-workers, an imaginary friend/devil/angel who constantly hovers around him with advice, various fantasies about getting power, becoming president
and a popular hero, and many trips down memory lane remembering mother's advice and dad's strange behaviour. His coworkers are planning a staged play in costumes,
his boss worships an almighty Grid that runs everyone's lives, the cheesy-poem-spouting Premier keeps disappearing, prompting a TV show to give rewards to finders
of the Premiere, and a chicken-actor has a nervous breakdown and runs around killing girls. A confusing movie that meanders between these various real, odd and
imaginary worlds, but doesn't really do anything with them until the ending which sort-of ties the threads together.
Adventure of Faustus Bidgood, The
Of course, any adaptation of Lewis Carroll's works is bound to be surreal and bizarre. But this one unintentionally adds its own layer due to a lack of vision.
Of course, there is no sense in reviewing the plot because there is nonsense in the plot. Alice finds she can go through the mirror into a world where she must find
her way through a chessboard landscape full of strange characters with their own nonsense logic, in order to ultimately become a queen. The biggest problem with this
adaptation is that they senselessly cast a 25 year old, bored-looking Kate Beckinsale in the role of what is supposed to be a confused, pedantic, surprised and demanding
child. But there is no sense of wonder, no sense of a confused child in the world of adults, and no sense that she cares about what is happening except to recite her lines
and crinkle her brow occasionally. The various name actors in the various roles are a mixed bag, with White Queen and Ian Holm as the White Knight bringing their
characters to life, but most of the rest seem awkward or setup in inappropriate costumes, failing to bring their roles to life. And what sense is there in the Wasps
nonsensical lines if he doesn't have a face like a Wasp? There is a difference between no sense and nonsense you know... besides the letter n that is.
Alice Through the Looking Glass
By the maker of Cannibal, which was basically just nasty gay snuff porn about two very broken men doing horrible things to themselves and each other, comes an even more extreme
movie about broken people doing nasty things. Two friends, one dying, three women, an old man and a disabled girl, all gather at an old house to partake in memories, conversation,
pretentious poetry, visions, emotions, philosophical gobbledygook, etc, but mostly just to kill and torture dolls, animals and each other, and partake in one disgusting or brutally
abusive scene after another, until the final murderous orgy. The many acts, depicted in fully zoomed, ultra-realistic and graphic detail, include squashing frogs, a very messy
carving up of a pig intercut with a rape, the killing or torturing of about ten other species of animals, all probably real, acts involving coprophilia, urine, vomit, torture of a
disabled girl via her colostomy, disemboweling, genital mutilation, etc etc. Think of the movie as Salo, as directed by Werner Schroeter with all his pretentious poetic nonsense,
and with the co-operation of Lucifer Valentine. There is no plot or comprehensible meaning to speak of, there is no rationale, philosophy or understandable characters, just very
broken people doing disgusting things in an 'artistic' movie. I would have liked to say that the movie merely depicts very disturbed people, cruelty and vileness, but the movie
actually revels in it and seems to think of this as art and emotional pathos. So it doesn't get much more objectionable than this. This is the movie I would imagine a psychopathic
serial killer would make before he broke out and started killing.
Angels' Melancholy, The
Hungarian theatrical art film that is based on a literary book about the Tragedy of Man. After Adam and Eve fall from Eden due to their conceits and Lucifer's
seduction, they continue with their sins and are guided through the world's history during monumental events when humanity takes a few steps forward. In ancient
Athens, Byzantium, Prague (as Kepler), Paris during the revolution and London during industrialization, Adam is constantly faced with a new ideal which gives
him new confidence in his conceit, only to have it fail in his face as humanity twists it around, using it for violence and more depravity. All the while he
yearns for Eve and finds her in each historical setting as well as Lucifer who appears in different guises to show him the failure of mankind. This is all filmed
in a confusing hodgepodge of dense historical references, poetic, pretentious soliloquies, and surrealistic snippets, and for some reason, the actors are all
children who perform like a bizarre avant-garde theatrical group complete with nudity and posing theatrics. A messy art film that gets lost in its overly
One of the nastier Pinkus and by far the nastiest movie by Hasebe. An annoying woman and her weak boyfriend who decorates cakes get a taste for blood
when they accidentally kill a deranged woman. When they find out what an aphrodisiac killing is, they go on a killing spree. Things get out of control
and the man develops an obsession for carving up women's genitals. Not visually graphic but relentlessly nasty, like an extreme Cat III entry.
Assault! Jack the Ripper
A seemingly random series of strange and absurd vignettes joined together by some kind of anarchistic, big, deaf-mute man. A midget bullfighter
fights a rhinoceros, man attacks golfer and removes his shoes, a rich man uses the man as a chew-toy for his dogs, animals are eaten and stuffed
at a taxidermist while being decorated with syringes, a fat woman is kidnapped and dragged up a mountain, two men shoot each other with darts as some kind of game,
a Dali painting is reproduced in real-life and some new-age philosophy on death is discussed. I couldn't decipher any meaning or goal out of this unfunny mess.
Maybe it was just an exercise in wordplay and strange humor.
Messy, bizarre film involving a lion taming assistant who gets raped by a snake-like monster that ripped its way out of a leopard
who then talks to his mother while in the womb and forces her to kill people and drink their blood so that he can be born
and return to the sea and replace mankind (don't ask). At times a silly satire on pregnancy and female harrassment by idiotic men,
and at other times just a very gory, bloody and incoherent horror movie.
A terrible home-made comedic romp on the backwoods horror genre that knows how bad it is but makes us suffer anyways. It's a celebration of trash: After a trashy sex scene,
an androgenous fat person of unknown gender carries a baby for 30 years while living in the woods. A full-grown man emerges from a posterior birth with a superior intellect,
but is unfortunately dropped on his head thus making him retarded. That's one of two laughs to be had from this movie. When a group of campers kill his mom, he receives
messages from a genitalia-challenged Mangina creature to cross-dress and go on a kiling rampage. The rest of the movie consists of endlessly padded out limp scenes of teenage hormones,
chasing in the forest, tedious attempts at comedy and acting retarded, and weak gore. There's a splattery breast-eating scene, one cute girl does the director a favor and
exposes her breasts so he extends the scene as much as he can by playing it on repeat several times, and then this camcorder movie with terrible sound came out short,
so he extended it with several pointless post-credit titles and played the whole movie in reverse.
Bad horror movie by Zuccon that tries to be mysterious and sophisticated by adding psychological layers of reality, only confusing us in the process and adding
up to nothing. A strange serial-killer couple kidnap various people before killing them in the hopes of finding something in their bodies. Then they
kidnap an unusual man who seems to have a psychic connection with them. Flashbacks regarding a murder in the family, a strange relationship with a
mother, and constant shifting of reality (i.e. bad editing) complicate matters as they occupy themselves with sex and try to achieve their goal.
What this goal is, is never explained, their attitude towards their victims is extremely inconsistent, one second they are strangely compassionate,
then they are eating eyeballs, and the multiple twist endings are both cliched and nonsensical. A confusing mess.
This is what you get if a group of pornographers tried to make a film about misandry a la Thelma & Lousie.
A low-budget, gritty look at a violent neighbourhood and a couple of extremely angry drug-addicted whores,
one of whom gets raped, sending them off on an anarchical crime and sex spree. This X-rated movie alternates between pornographic
sex and pointless bloody violence, following the very unsympathetic women on their path to doom.
Baise Moi (Rape Me)
Another in the long line of Ilsa-style Nazixploitation clones with a lesbian German officer in charge of torturing, experimenting
and humiliating women. Mixed with this one is a dull action and drama movie of guerilla activities and warfare. The occasional nasty bits
come out of nowhere, including ridiculously sleazy scenes of a bestial dwarf raping women and ripping off their pubic hair.
Beast in Heat, The (AKA Horrifying Experiments of the S.S. Last Days)
Only the Japanese can mix art and exploitative violent sex this way. An early shocker supposedly dealing with the topic of
nature versus nurture as an insane rapist begets a son through his victim who is a wife of a professor. This anti-social son grows up wanting
to be like his father and more, despising the weak idiotic masses, kidnapping popular girls and methodically humiliating them until their psychology breaks
down and becomes something else. For every weak statement the movie makes however, there are 10 exploitative scenes of rape, torture and wicked humiliation.
Beautiful Girl Hunter
This concerns only the last episode of the 15 hour TV series by Fassbinder. Whereas the series was based on a book and develops an existential character study
of a weak-willed, violent, naive man, the epilogue is Fassbinder's surreal interpretation of this story as a mad Ken Russell biopic. Characters, events
and dialogue are reshuffled as in a dream, traumatic highlights of the man's life re-appear in different ways, there are strange characters in shiny
costumes, anachronisms, random nudity, characters re-interpreted as gay, the Nazi subtexts are exposed, Franz has several nightmares in an insane asylum
involving violence, strange doctors, torture and revelations about his friends and girlfriends, and all kinds of artistic, symbolic scenes are included
such as Jesus crucified against a backdrop of a nuclear bombc. A mess, and a complete clash with what came before.
Berlin Alexanderplatz Epilogue
A bad rip-off of Rosemary's baby complete with a married couple, a traitorous husband, Satanic neighbours,
rituals and Satanic brides, only this one is soft-core porn and happens to include rape, sex with a goat and sodomy with a sword.
Arthouse sleaze supposedly making statements about consumerism and violence vs. sex, but this is just a strange, disgusting mess of a movie.
A woman with rape fantasies is taken to a photographer's home who treats his models as merchandise and has dominant, perverse relastionships with them.
The rest of the movie consists of weird sex and fantasies, submissive women degraded and used, and models being locked up, fed junk food and made
to urinate and defecate into coke cans and cigarette boxes
This Australian gore movie gets a prize for the most bizarre deaths ever. The movie is all over the place and so messy that
plot lines are left hanging, characters are left in the middle of a predicament, and neither the dialog nor the deaths make much sense.
A chemical company making super-health vitamins and treatments is illegally experimenting on the locals. But their chemicals rapidly
get a life of their own, causing people to hallucinate about deformed lovers who massage ribs out of chests, drink detergent, crack up and break out with
wormy tentacles, explode, melt, deliver a living killer placenta, get hardons that explode, develop grotesquely swollen tongues, drown in their own snot, etc.
And I thought nobody made movies like this anymore since John Waters mellowed out. Frank is a real-life old and nasty bum who doesn't only recite his lines
like a robot, but needs subtitles to understand what he's saying. He was taught by his mom to warn people before he kills them so he tells various people
that annoy him how he will bite their penis off, decapitate them and defecate down their neck, do nasty things to their skull and rip off their face, and then
actually does it literally and graphically. But Frank is a lonely man in search of tits, so his friends at work who bought him a blow-up sheep put an ad in
the paper and get women to come visit him with disastrous results. Extreme trash with a very low-budget that offers a few slimy chuckles.
Bride of Frank, The
A strange, pointless fantasy that imagines Bunuel, Dali and the poet Lorca together on a nonsensical, part Dan Brown, part Indiana Jones adventure.
Bunuel imagines the whole thing as a flashback for no good reason other than that Solomon's Table has something to do with time travel, we get
pointless numerous references to the works of all three, some fanboyish glowing over Bunuel's movies, and then the nonsensical hunt for the Table that
finds the trio going through some surreal tests that don't seem to be testing anything (one of them sleeps with a naked girl then wakes up threatened
with circumcision only to cut to another scene with no outcome), and then they travel through the bowels of the earth seeing all kinds of strange images
from Dali's head, but nothing ever happens, as if someone built the sets then lost the script. But the worst aspect is that the protagonists have no
spine, character or humor, and with such colorful celebrities, one would expect a surplus of these. A tedious mess.
Bunuel and King Solomon's Table
A 12 million dollar pornography and gore film about the depraved Roman emperor. Explicit hardcore porn, imaginative
gory violence, a rich production and Shakespearean actors like Gielgud. 2 1/2 hours of every kind of excess trying
to hide under the excuse that it is historically accurate. Unbelievable.
A man with a fetish for being eaten and for eating human flesh searches the internet for a man with compatible tastes. After several failed attempts,
he finds the man of his dreams, works up an appetite, battles with his willpower, has lots of sex, and proceeds to carve him up and eat him in
great detail. The gore effects are so disturbingly realistic, you'd swear they were using a real human body. The direction is interesting, the atmosphere
is palpable and well done, the dubbing job is bad albeit the dialog is sparse, but it's still just pointless gay snuff porn. That it's based on real
events doesn't change anything.
Basically a remake of Grande Bouffe, except instead of four men systematically eating themselves to death, we get two high-class neurotic couples going mad for some
obscure supernatural reason at a massive villa with neverending food, and indulging themselves in every whim and pleasure. They gradually become more and more
insane and uninhibited except for the artist who becomes depressed. Wild eating habits become orgies of pleasures and mountains or baths full of food, then cannibalism
and coprophilia straight out of a Salo flick, and this blends with random sexual pleasures, depravities and violence, while the artist broods, makes speeches,
and hallucinates. If the movie is an allegory about a life of hedonism without art, then it is an uninsightful one. Otherwise, it's just pointless filth.
Champagne Club, The
A pretentious study on individualism vs conformist groups by the usually interesting Kiyoshi Kurosawa.
A cop tries to save both a lunatic criminal who demands to "restore the rules of the world", and his hostage,
but ends up losing both. This sends him on a quest for discovery on the issues of individualism and intolerance, the philosophical exploration
depicted using a metaphor of one special tree poisoning the forest and the various factions that try to fight for one or the other.
Obscure, a plodding lack of pacing, and inscrutable.
Lame bad taste coroner and autopsy humor, a touch of nudity and slapstick, toilet humor, and the occasional gore effects that consist of
very obvious hard rubber dolls and body parts. The non-witty banter involves things like necrophilia, selling bodies as dog food, penis transplants,
silly autopsy jokes, etc. Despite the title, this doesn't deliver neither sex nor splatter.
Also known officially as Cruel History of Prisoners. Similar to Teruo Ishii's Tokugawa torture series but without the style or interesting stories. This is simply a
collection of period scenes and stories where women are tied, whipped, raped and tortured to death. Men come home to find their wives or daughters
doing something they shouldn't, and that's enough of a 'story' to portray yet another stream of sadistic tortures, which is obviously the focus of this movie.
One woman is beaten to death, another has her genitalia tortured with some kind of acid then sliced off, there's a female bisexual masochist into extreme biting,
a quick scene of torturing and raping ninjas, and yet another nasty punishment by sharp dildo. So, basically, an artistic snuff movie. Followed by the less extreme
and more story-oriented Horrific Torture of Japanese Women which assigns the brutality and misogny to the
dominating Japanese military and its culture.
Cruel History of the Female Inquisition (AKA History of Women's Torture)
This one's practically impossible to review. For starters, there's no detectable plot, and the plots and descriptions released with the movie don't seem to
match the movie which is basically a chaotic LSD trip. This is a sci-fi movie made by trans-genders featuring a small budget that seems to have been spent
on gaudy, outrageous costumes and a wide range of colorful cinematography effects and filters. The feel of this psychedelia is cheap but uniquely bizarre
and chaotic, making Liquid Sky look like a mainstream movie. There's a heavy focus on genitalia and simulated pornographic sex, as if the film-makers
were too obsessed with their own personal issues to make a real movie. There's splatter, colorful body fluids, random geeky sci-fi narration, silly
comedic voice-overs, and demented action like a gay HK fantasy action flick on acid. And there are the endless bizarre scenes which have nothing
to do with each other including: A person urinates on some cheap plastic alien plants which suddenly grow and attack his/her body, artists paint on breasts
and are gorily interrupted by a person with exposed genitalia and ridiculously huge shoes, a fight with plastic chainsaws, flower darts and a sparkler,
a man with a flame for a head, a spider-vagina creature that comes out of a book, a gory penis-drill, and much more. Ultimately bizarre but annoyingly senseless.
Drugs, filth, sleaze and violence wrapped in a bad trip of a movie that explores the mind of a drug-addict whore that is having a bad day, except she can't seem
to figure out what really happened to her. A bad encounter with a client seems to have ended in violence and possibly a murder, but every time she revisits it,
the events seem to change. In the meantime she tries to stay at some fat guy's place who throws strange parties for drug addicts, and who, together with his Dominatrix wife,
abuses or rapes his guests in various nasty ways. It isn't creative like a Lynch movie, you don't really care about any of the losers and freaks in the movie or what
is going to happen to them, and the trippy camera work and editing tricks just become tiresome fast.
What on earth was that? This utterly perplexing French z-grade horror movie never even begins to make sense. There's a freakish man wearing a nazi-uniform and an old-man mask
killing people, a black cat that causes hallucinations, a very frisky and aggressive black horse, some old guy that spends the entire movie, night & day, trying to shoot
this crazy horse without any results, a mummy that can raise the dead, some weird old woman that likes to bury people alive, a couple that stay at a castle during a rainy night,
some girl that seems to come and go here and there for no reason whatsoever, a ship swallowed by a cliff which is then belched out again, confusing fight scenes, and so on.
This is a movie where you give up on it making any sense right from the start, except there isn't much to entertain here besides the constant confusion and surprise.
Oh, and there are a couple of lingering cheap splatter scenes that would make Nathan Schiff proud.
A surreal trip into the mind of a sick man who got cut by the doctor at birth, lost his parents, became addicted to self-mutilation by razor,
has whores urinate on him, and develops an unhealthy attraction to little girls, one of which he nails to a wall. This sick and disturbing but very well filmed
short offers no insights or plot, only a nightmarish, non-linear experience. Also features a gripping dark soundtrack.
Divided Into Zero
A stylistic movie in the vein of Natural Born Killers about teen angst and a group
of teens on a violent crime and sex spree. The crucial difference though is that this movie
respects and even idolizes these repulsive creatures who murder, lie, cheat, and indulge heavily
in their sexual depravity, intensely foul mouths and self-absorbed, psychotic characters. This is also
a homosexual movie posing as heterosexual and features non-stop gore, violence, sex and very colorful language.
To top it all off, the climax features even more repulsive charactes in the form of homophobic nazis that chop off
a guy's genitals and this was supposed to be a comedy yet lacks even one laugh.
Doom Generation, The
An artist slowly loses his mind as he fights with his girls, is stressed by his agent, and an annoying punk band plays
their obnoxious noise next to his apartment day and night, until he starts rampaging in streets drilling holes into
random people. Gritty and repulsively dark.
Wildly experimental cinema featuring some silent throwback expressionism cut together with headache-inducing random montages, repeating footage
of a woman being chased naked in the snow by a man in a mask, rape, tarot and crystal balls, and some extreme scenes of male sodomy, abuse and
fisting. The silent sub-movie presents a group of people performing some sleazy exploitation melodrama, some S&M, then a sexually ambiguous
person sings an opera, then they turn vampiric and insane while abusing each other. The grating soundtrack is as annoying as it can get: Noise
that sounds like a warped radio tuner, classical music mixed with gunshots, beeps and tones like a cat on a synthesizer, pounding industrial
beats and electronica, electronic vibrations, etc. It all only adds up to something that requires an aspirin. Of course there's always going
to be some idiot that will call this artistic. Color filters, transgressive imagery and montages do not an art movie make.
Edwin Brienen's Hysteria
An artsy, dull, allegorical study by Herzog on antiestablishmentarianism and the free human spirit portrayed by some undefined
establishment and its rebelling members/students/patients. The whole cast consists of dwarves, perhaps to point out a system
that is too big, impractical and inappropriate for an enjoyable and free life. The manager of the place tries to keep things
under control as the troop goes on a rampage, destructing property and nature, throwing live chickens through windows, bullying
blind dwarves, laughing and having a wild time in general while the chickens resort to cannibalism. A typical scene is when a
dwarf stares and laughs at a camel for 5 whole minutes until he starts coughing and the camel defecates.
Even Dwarves Started Small
An angry hateful movie by an angry writer who seems to think his misanthropic bile is interesting. The protagonist is a middle-class ex-drummer with a varied
sex life who is willingly drafted by three trashy punk musicians to join their band. One is a violent woman-beater, another is deaf and lives with a junkie
wife and child, and the third is homosexual, his arm is numb from masturbation, his mother is bald and is having an affair with the violent one, and his
father is psychotic and bed-ridden. Add to the mix another band singer with a huge penis and a penchant for raping people of both sexes. The ex-drummer
enters this world with arrogant anti-social motivations of manipulation and twisted amusement, philosophizing occasionally while revving up the violence,
obscenities and hate. Non-stop indulgence in pointless trash, hate and violence that is out to offend every race, gender and sensibility, backed by creative,
talented and bizarre cinematography including people who walk on ceilings, a movie moving backwards and a woman who's vagina becomes a room.
A few movies edited together that never really meet: A cheesily dubbed sci-fi flick about a world run by robots (cops, psychiatrists, priests, etc) who are after
a robot serial killer, a psychotic robot that goes around killing women and carving them up into gory quivering flesh while seeing confusingly edited hallucinations
of mutated creatures, devils and talking books and stuffed animals, literally dozens of porn actresses showing off their huge fake boobs while screaming, and lots of
huge bugs getting squashed. The kills consist of the aforementioned screaming boobs edited together with scenes of bloody weapons. An extremely repetitive, silly mess.
Bizarre Philippine movie that presumably is a commentary on the deterioration of modern society. The family unit that literally "eats soil together stays together" but
everywhere, things are rotten. The teenage daughter imagines she's pregnant and ponders over which family member did it to her or why she can't eat soil,
the teenage son is abusing and killing Chinese, a TV show talks only about sleaze and criminals and becomes so useless, the presenter starts babbling nonsense,
there's a cult orgy, random surreal gore, violent cockfights, whores, drugs, a midget that pretends to be the baby of the family, a naked girl that acts as if
she's being raped, a claymation sequence involving ketchupy rape and violence by soldiers, and other random oddities. Uninsightful sleaze.
Family That Eats Soil, The
Didn't they already trash-up Red Riding Hood in Freeway? In any case, this Cuban version raises the trash and sleaze quota, and places its story in a Cuban backwoods
countryside, but, although there is a girl with a red hood, a woodsman, and grandmother, that's as far as the original story goes in this version. One of the first scenes
involves a very ugly man dressed up as a grandmother with multi-colored teeth, convincing her son to sodomize his wife at the dinner table in order to teach her a lesson
while the retarded son of the union between the grandmother and her son watches on. And it doesn't get any better after that, with puppy-bestiality, an uncle that practices
Satanism, violent sex and more. Pointless shock-trash for its own sake.
Ferozz: The Wild Red Riding Hood
The background of this video is that a warped writer named Vernon Chatman send some screenplays to sites offering custom-made porn, containing the most absurd, inane,
retarded, bizarre, warped and strange fetish scenes he can think of, all containing nudity but no real sex. And they actually delivered, in four short movies with a level
of quality that makes porn-production-quality sound good. There is simply no describing how... speechless this one will make you. And it's not just one retarded idea,
it's a neverending stream of insanity and prank fetishes that could only have come from a heavily medicated mind. A woman washes herself in water from a jar labelled
"tears of neglected children" then reads from the Koran. Another woman holds a knife to her throat while claiming she is turning British. And so on. Imagine 70 minutes
of the following type of scenes, each only lasting a few seconds before switching to the next absurdity and non-sequitur: A man, his wife and daughter (in panties)
are sitting on the floor. The man says "I was born and raised by lesbians. Wanna meet my daddy?". After which he pulls out a large dropper out of his pants. The
daughter takes it, says: "Hi grandpa. Get yourself some gramps." Rubbing herself with the dropper and then: "I'm going to kill your dinner with karate...hiyaa!".
And this is a moderately insane example amongst over a hundred. Enough said.
An incomprehensible, highly eccentric and unrewarding absurdist Autralian film. A man is promoted to work for the all-mysterious and revered firm, which turns out
to be populated by madmen. His boss talks about vegetables in incomprehensible ways and acts like a cat, he is given the day off on his first day, then given
assignments which consists of interacting with two odd men dressed in black, and yellow hats, that keep popping up chasing him in airplanes or tractors to play
bizarre games and make him deliver meaningless messages and fulfill pointless missions. More odd things happen, like walking on the beach and seeing a vision of
a hippy in a cave who promptly disappears. In the meantime, his wife is having an affair. Most people talk in non-sequiturs, three girls from another section
are sent to give him an exorcism when he goes temporarily mad, there is a completely surreal board meeting involving a hodge-podge of costumes, nonsensical
speeches, after which they act like cats and make a pumpkin explode, and so on. Tedious eccentricity.
Firm Man, The
Earlier work by the transexual-lesbian maker of Dandy Dust. A lesbian sci-fi movie involving a female pyromaniac revolutionary wearing Groucho Marx
eyebrows and pyramid horns, a comic book artist whose printshop was burned down by her lover, and a weird woman in a red latex suit who likes eating
snails and blowtorching mini alligators. This trio interact and take revenge on each other randomly and boringly for most of the movie with pretentious,
poetic, nonsensical dialog, or non-sequiturs. The scenery consists of cheap toys and miniatures, a car is made futuristic by covering it with a sheet,
there are some parties and art shows, sex with furniture, a bizarre sex performance, and a climactic fight scene where people are turned into a cardboard
cutout in latex. Nothing makes sense and there seems to be some kind of fetish for liquids. Boringly murky, chaotic and self-indulgent.
Indescribable 6-part Japanese anime. I have a theory about this one: Someone wrote a home-made computer algorithm for generating an anime script based on
random snippets from other anime shows, and he animated whatever came out of the printer. Japanese shows are notorious for being confusing and nonsensical,
but this one takes the cake. There's random dialogue between an adolescent, his sister and family, an alien on a moped, and an agent without eyebrows.
There's a fire, some random violent action, a drama over a baseball bat, sexual innuendo, cutesy cartoonish drama, and lots of random stuff that teenagers
get obsessed over except it's just jumbled together, and then there are the robots that keep growing out of huge bumps in his head after the alien hits him
with a bass guitar and a moped. And that's the only description you'll get for this one. This show redefines the word brainless. You brain will be screaming
'what's going on?' over and over until it'll overload and shut down. An unpleasant experience.
Monty is a narcissistic bodybuilder that is a bundle of impulses, bigoted views, idiocies and self-worship, and he would represent a raw Id except for the fact
that he is too disciplined a muscle-man. His brother Bertin is the 'brainy' one, but he only looks brainy standing next to Monty. Bertin keeps a pet man in a cage
who masturbates and eats bananas, there are repressed homosexual urges, weird Freudian dreams and fantasies involving their mother and incestuous grandmother,
silly macho bashing, a home-made gym with a man-sized hamster cage, lots of silly phallic symbolism, a weird nun that talks poetic nonsense and who seems fascinated
by Monty, fart humor, sex with a blow-up doll and stuffed bear, dialogue that is both prententious and sophomoric, and a mish-mash of Lilith mythology. What does
it all add up to? Nothing. To think that people persevered to get this bizarre movie made and released for 14 years is depressing.
Flexing With Monty
Another Dennis Hopper rough head-scratcher from the 70s and a fitting accompanying piece to The Last Movie. A group of pathetic, has-been Anglo-Saxon white people are
living their days in a Spanish village. A junkie poet (Hopper) keeps hallucinating his mother and abuses a local girl with some eggs in classic eye-poppingly intense
Hopper style, an ex-Hollywood-starlet keeps boasting on and on about her heydey, a war veteran is lost in his old glory days while his alcoholic wife suffers, and an
aging queen isn't getting any. A group of beautiful people appear to torment this human detritus with nothing except their own desires, all of their hallucinations
getting worse, until they each meet an ironically cruel end. While this is happening, the locals suffer or die accidents and no one pays attention, and there's a
strange girl who is always involved with some kind of animal death or suffering. An attack on anglo-saxon corruption and vice? Perhaps. But it's too stoned to make
Flowers of Vice, The (AKA Bloodbath)
Cult, rare, bizarre feminist movie that looks like a low-budget Jodorowsky with PVC and urban landscapes instead of organic costumes and sets, and overflowing with feminist agenda.
The goal of the movie is none other than to portray the rise of civilization as symbolic absurdities and surrealisms, with a critical feminist eye. The costumes seem to be
fashioned by a gay designer on LSD and on a streak of whimsical creativity, but they evidently ran out of a budget for locations and sets, filming against a decidedly
modern urban landscape, undermining the historical and abstract aspects of the show. It is light on dialogue, and half of it emphasizes theatrical, physical performances.
Orlando appears in many guises and costumes in the films many sequences, including: suckling off of mother nature's breast who is growing out of the ground like a tree,
building early civilization by pounding an anvil in a shopping mall surrounded by dwarves, leading a harmonious society in the forest, subjugated and tortured
by the rise of Christianity with masses of wild men running around in PVC flagellating themselves while holding a phallic idol, there's a two-headed female prophet,
a naked Venus is made fun of by boorish men, Orlando cross-dresses as a man and falls for siamese twins, one of which drives her to murder, and finally, she takes part
in a pageant of playboy bunnies judged on by old men, until she gives up and goes back to mother nature. This entertainingly bizarre experience grows tiresome
due to the constant theatrics, the lack of a complete visual experience, and the rabid, tired feminist head-clobbering.
One of the worst movies ever made about a retarded character that thinks things like huge animal penises, spraying elephant semen on his dad, and swinging newborn
babies by their umbilical cord are funny. The movie spares nothing in its ultimately juvenile and annoying 'humor' on things like crippled girls that like their
legs caned, child molestation, gore, etc.
Freddy Got Fingered
Without Oliver Stone's hand, this sequel is pure trash and exploitation entertainment without style. This time around, the story is loosely based around Hansel
and Gretel with characters such as a female, murderess necrophiliac (Hansel) who receives visions from a transvestite cannibalistic nun (the witch), and a
whole slew of female prisoners with various disorders and crimes, all young nubile females of course. Brings to mind a slicker John Waters flick.
Freeway 2: Confessions of a Trickbaby
20 minute Japanese nasty that has more nasty scenes than half a dozen other movies of its ilk. 6 friends gather for a party and take some heavy drugs.
Before you know it, euphoric happiness mixes with nihilistic joy of gruesome stories involving violence and gore, and they start playing with each
other in the same way as well. Giggling, they corkscrew their friend's head, drive a pencil through an eye, and stab themselves several dozen times,
while imagining a gory execution or the roasting of a newborn baby while one guy draws birds on the wall with a mutated hand-brush. Filmed with
classical music and artsy use of color and black & white, but pointlessly shocking.
Garden Without Birds, A
While Nazisploitation movies are bad enough for using concentration camps as cheap titillation, this one commits the additional crime of pretending to be
a real movie. Yet again, beautiful women are used, raped, tortured and killed in a camp with sadistic Nazis and a dominatrix. Worse than any of the torture
or rampant nudity however is the Nazi propaganda, the attempt at drama amidst all the exploitation, and the really sick 'love' affairs between the soldiers
and the female victims.
Gestapo's Last Orgy
Deranged Pinku satire that mixes lots of sex and nudity with a silly plot about Bush's secret finger as sought after by spies. I can promise you that after my
description, you will still not understand any better. Let me start at the beginning: A prostitute who roleplays teachers finds herself in the wrong place and
is shot by a spy who is after Bush's finger. Still don't get it? See, the finger controls a super-weapon that can destroy the world. It can also give a Japanese
girl orgasms by remote control. Problem is, the bullet in her head didn't kill her, instead it makes her psychic and able to learn and understand everything in books
within seconds. It also makes her feel sweet and spicy foods long after she ate, and makes her break out in another attack of horniness just in time for the Pinku sex
quota. So she uses her newfound powers to educate young men by rewarding their understanding with nudity and sex, except spies with guns keep interrupting. Obviously
a statement about US as a super-power but not a very insightful one. All I am left with is the knowledge that I just saw a movie that uses the words 'Noam Chomsky'
as an aphrodisiac. Woe is me.
Glamorous Life of Sachiko Hanai, The
Bizarre and dark chaotic movie with a seemingly misanthropic message. It starts like a Mad Max post-apocalyptic movie by way of Jodorowsky as a man with
a curse is being executed ritualistically, but he cannot die. Then it goes on to angels and prophets with a comical edge, incest, a battle with a joker-like
man with green hair, a scene of an incestual marriage in 1900 ending in violence, then even more madness involving Santa Clause at a wake full of of weird
people that turns more and more chaotic, nonsensical, violent and gory with every minute. The message? The future will be as screwed up as the past. Bah.
Goodbye, 20th Century
A sequel to Crazy Lips. Actually it's more of a revisitation of the insanity and some of the characters, this time involving an even more nonsensical plot.
A mother is accused of murdering her daughter but when she tells her tale, things don't seem to make sense. Her husband says they have no daughter,
there's a psychic that can trace phone calls, a blonde who sings the US anthem, a house with no bathroom, some Lynchian dream sequences, aliens, breeding experiments,
very quirky FBI agents, and some other random events. Oh and the main actress breaks out into song again. I've had enough of this after the first outing.
Gore From Outer Space
More like 'Misogyny in Venice'. This is part giallo, part soft-porn featuring a parade of acts of violence and humiliations to women, some of the women
actually liking it. The mystery case involves the usual murders and beautiful women, as well as a man who forces his girl into perverse humiliating sexcapades.
A couple of gruesome murders include rape with a knife and sawing off a woman's thigh.
Gore in Venice
Some heavy drugs were most probably taken and worshipped for this movie. Once a lost film, made by French painter Martial Raysse, this one could be a more hippie-esque
accompanying piece to Begotten. Some ordinary people sitting in their kitchen are criticizing some banalities while watching TV, when all of a sudden a cat-mask wearing
weirdo cycles by. The movie suddenly swerves into an improvised, pretentious, fantasy trip, all of it filmed in negative colors and gritty film stock. We meet 'Innocence' (a naked
little girl), 'Mr Nature', a mad leader of a cult who speaks of the Grand Departure where his flock will depart from this corrupt Earth and be liberated, a bunch of people wearing
animal masks, a girl named Mona Lisa who is getting married in a strange ritual, and so on. 'Heaven' is a country house, the Cat Man is associated with death, and indeed he
does seem to be involved with some questionable odd people with strange ideas and guns, not to mention that he randomly rapes a girl in the woods, and the cult finally embarks
on a 'raft of life' for the hallucinogenic 20-minute climax involving a cacophony of sounds and imagery while the people on the floating raft do odd things and play with
the Earth which is by now a toy ball. Tedious, and strictly for people looking for the cinematographic equivalent of a trip.
Grand Departure, The
Four men decide to try to commit suicide by overeating. It starts out with style as the various men find new ways to indulge their hedonism to excess,
but it then becomes debauchery with whores, lots of sex, extreme endless flatulence, exploding toilets, and of course enough food to make you sick
just by watching it. A schoolteacher joins them to add to the allegory I suppose. Allegedly a parable on the fall of modern society,
but there is no satire, no tragedy or insight, and no message. Just shocking brainless art posing as an allegory.
Grande Bouffe, La (Blow-Out)
The first in a long series of Japanese movies that deal with the topics of snuff
and gore with attempted shocking realism. One of the releases actually fooled Charlie Sheen to report the release as a real filmed death.
This first is quite dull however, mainly due to the boring and unrealistic acting by the female victim. A group of men
kidnap a girl and torture her in various ways for days, using beatings, loud noise, pliers, maggots, knives, etc. The effects range from
lame to sickening but the unconvincing way this is handled and the lack of plot make this worthless.
Guinea Pig: The Devil's Experiment
A cut-and-paste job of Coffin Joe movies consisting of the most odd and horrific scenes from previous Coffin Joe movies, and some deleted scenes usually
involving more nudity, strangeness or evil, all wrapped together inside a weak movie about a man who is deliriously obsessed with Coffin Joe, thus providing
the excuse to splice together all of these scenes as dream sequences. An interesting touch that predates New Nightmare is to bring in Jose Mojica Marins
himself to try to cure the man but, as you can imagine, this isn't a real movie.
Hallucinations of a Deranged Mind
Experimental film from Skolimowski consisting of an avant-garde introduction, and footage from a censored movie he made during his surreal Barrier period. The intro is
a kind of surreal film-diary depicting images of Skolimowski's film career, war-torn Beirut, some bizarre sci-fi scenes of carnage, a ping-pong game with blackness
and other miscellaneous symbolic imagery. The film itself consists of a group of anti-communist students participating in strange rituals, death re-enacments and games in a
boxcar full of dusty plaster and candles, taking speed, discussing various topics with increasingly impenetrable dialog, and being interrogated by an unseen party
about a poster of Stalin with four eyes. Strange, haphazard and mostly impenetrable self-indulgence; for fans of experimental films only.
Normally, twisted porn movies wouldn't be listed here but this one happens to be insane. A nymphomaniac is locked up
in a special treatment center where a cult has orgies and uses neurotic patients for their severely demented ideas of
eroticism. These ideas include chopping off a penis or the girl's head while having sex. Other bizarre, gory and over-the-top sequences are included.
In the dictionary, under 'scatter-brained' it should refer to this movie. The spoof concept is a good one, about a soldier in the German army during WWII who disappears in the middle
of the Stalingrad war and re-appears 40 years later in Germany, encountering a fierce culture-clash. The implementation however... Let's just say it's as if Jack Smith
filmed some random footage, and someone else spliced and dubbed over this footage with improvised and a completely whimsical narrative. Sometimes the dialogue has absolutely
nothing with what we are seeing, other times it seems like someone forgot the plot, and 90% of the time it feels random, until someone remembers that they had better go
back to the theme of the movie, before wandering off again after 2 minutes. The result is ultimately bizarre. In Stalingrad, the soldier wraps himself up in plaster
turning himself into a statue, there's a long scene involving fishing a dog out of sea and measuring it, the women (and some cross-dressers) left behind during the war wave
for 10 minutes at American airplanes while ranting about various odds and ends, some involving German pride and nationality, then they dress up a black man in women's clothing and
mention that hair caps were good while the bombing was going on. There's a street performer, endless monologues about family and guessing games about who is whom's parent and who
fought at what war, random memories and thoughts of the minute, people's faces are painted with random colors serving as makeup, there's a random murder and evisceration,
random eating of a priest's feces, random mentioning of six nipples, a random pie-fight with a priest and man in a swimsuit, random Chaplin imitations, etc. This movie
isn't just brainless, it is also headless, limbless and torsoless.
Pretentiously poetic, experimental and artsy movie that takes its symbolism so far and takes it so seriously, it becomes laughable. A man meets a frail, convict woman
in a cemetery and vows to take care of her. The begin a bizarre relationship where he dictates to her literally volumes of books on various subjects while she writes,
or reads poetry, and then it develops into an 'erotic' relationship where he obsessively takes pictures of her snatch. But this 'paradise' falls apart as she
becomes restless, does very strange things while she sleepwalks, and a literal rat enters their lives to pleasure her sexually and eat up his erotic photographs.
The herb of the rat is the symbolic poison which contains its own antidote. In addition to all of this obvious symbolism, the movie also features scenes of him
taking pictures of a skeleton in provocative poses, which is when I couldn't stop laughing.
Herb of the Rat
It doesn't get much more worthless than this. Forget about giving gay cinema a bad name, this makes you rethink you opinions on state control of movie makers.
At times a John Waters-esque piece of campy trash, but mostly a boring, self-indulgent mess. Some braindead, boring guy that runs an open-field porn-store
is trying to complete his goal of sleeping with 2000 men, with number 2000 being some dysfunctional bizarre man called Happy who talks to his squeaking radio box.
A manic, over-acting, flamingly gay dude who is angry at the world in general terrorizes them while some transexual prances about like an elephant showing off
his fake boobs riveted to his chest. They dance at endlessly boring rave parties, there's a nasty disemboweling and rape scene that is promptly forgotten for
some reason, some pointless witch-doctoring, talk of a flood that never arrives, an acid-trip of an ending, and other stupid randomness that never adds up to anything.
Colorful campy trash that brings to mind Forbidden Zone, or a country-musical as directed by John Waters, except this is a Canadian movie! Wynona-Sue Turnpike
is having a hell of a life, bouncing from one soapy over-the-top misfortune to another, when all she wants to do is chain-smoke and play guitar. Her response
to anyone that pushes her too far is to shoot them in the head. She goes from a philandering abusive husband, to a guy that gives her a VD, forces her into
porn and keeps a pet gender-bending freaky girl with a beard and a massive attached dildo. She is inspected by an Elvis-impresonator gynecologist, given
the death sentence, molested by her dad, cheated on by a pathetic lover, and hated by her mother and huge black slut daughter. Racist epithets fly in this
movie where big ugly drag-queens are ever-present as a kind of greek chorus. The sets and costumes are day-glo cartoons with only the most garish colors,
and the ton of makeup and hairdo on everyone is so over-the-top that it would make drag queens blush. The honky-tonk country music is painful, but nothing
beats the protagonist who whines, screeches, cries and wails throughout the movie in an ear-grating high-pitched voice, and, as if that weren't enough,
we get her constant narration and singing as well. This movie should be referenced in the dictionary under obnoxious.
Highway of Heartache
Various loosely-filmed stories are spliced together using a slew of cinematography tricks with a Dogma feel and improvised acting.
A film-crew with a pretentious director is filming a fast-food version of The Duchess of Malfi while his producer conspires, an annoying documentary team
is following him to film the 'making-of', various other characters weave in and out of the movie to abuse their wives or rant about Venice, and
the mysterious hotel they are staying in practices violence and cannibalism. Features a dozen celebrities in strange, short, improvisational roles,
gratuitous and explicit fetishistic or perverse sex scenes, and endless boredom. I really tried to like this movie given its brave experimentation
and handful of bizarre, fascinating scenes but it just never coheres or develops.
A twisted black comedy about a dysfunctional family. Jackie-O is obsessed over Jackie Kennedy and the JFK assassination, and has
an incestual relationship with her twin brother ever since she was born holding his private parts. The mother is obsessive-compulsive
and makes jarring remarks like 'how did you fit in my womb?'. The father disappeared mysteriously and the older brother has his own disturbing
quirks. When the male twin brings home his new, very normal and innocent fiancee, matters get out of hand.
House of Yes, The
Polish surrealism similar to Hour-Glass Sanatorium, in that it weaves non-linear snippets of a person's life through the prisms of a dream and overlapping, freely-associated
memories and thoughts. Unlike the superb Hour-Glass Sanatorium however, it fails. He meets people from his past (many of them women who all strip and perform a sex scene
as if there was some kind of quota for the actor), and we are told what happened to them, but not who they are, barely anything about what they meant to him, and nothing about
their story. He informs us that he killed a person, and we have to wait until the end for the killing which, once again, tells us nothing. His main purpose for this
reminiscence is to figure out why his friend Max killed himself, and this goes nowhere. He asks personal questions without answers, he shares thoughts, most of which have
no meaning except to him, and the symbolism falls flat. In short, a self-indulgent arthouse waste of time.
How Far, How Near
Silly and naive dystopian sci-fi movie from Italy. Conventional human activities and behaviour are all made childish and weird against nonsensical 'sci-fi' sets and props,
close to the point of unintelligibility. A childish young man travels to a kind of scientific school where students are brainwashed regarding the evils of liberty and sex,
and strange experiments are performed on people. Men are washed in silly 'futuristic' washing machines and car washes, a robotic little girl is made to do things like kill
a fish, and they perform strange rituals. When a student breaks out in the spirit of liberty, chaos and nudity erupts, but they are too naive and immature to understand
what to do and the consequences of what they do, even when given a gun in their hands. The boy and girl take a break, living in a hut in a snowy wilderness where they
experiment with relationships, then the boy returns to school and oppressive masters with some violent thoughts.
Artsy, symbolic, poetic (read: pretentious) piece with an overacting, annoyingly whiny Nico from Velvet Underground performing abstract scenes with
various men, spouting monologues, rants, poetry, and singing terrible new-age music. The symbolism covers a rocky relationship between man and woman
in a barren landscape (e.g. woman cries while man walks in circles), children, monologues about mercy and justice, the soul, and various existential
ambiguities, with surreal scenes of fire, deserts, ice, waterfalls, shepherds, naked man on horseback, etc. Emotions, symbols and cinematic experimentation
that is obviously up for various interpretations by film-school buffs, but for me this is pretentious artsy indulgence at its worst.
Inner Scar, The
Extreme Euro-trash featuring an incestuous brother and sister who visit a Greek island to violently kill all perverts while inflicting them with
their own over-the-top sickness and brutality. Goat-sex, urine, rape, homosexuals and various very brutal deaths decorate this boring pseudo
shock-fest that isn't even interesting enough to be called bad taste.
Island of Death
The absolute, unsurpassed apex of exploitation sleaze. In a Nazi camp, men and women are experimented on in a wide variety of horrifying ways by
Ilsa, an Aryan dominatrix who's pet project involves proving that women can withstand more pain and torture than men, and also tends to punish
men that don't perform to her satisfication in bed until an American comes to tame the shrew with his sexual prowess. The real tragedy is that
this story is based on real expirements and accounts of SS camps, only in this movie the girls are all sexy, and the nudity, S&M and gore is
gratuitous and rampant.
Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS
Pet Shop Boys, the movie. Not much of a movie actually, but more like a sequence of strange music videos wrapped around a supposed road trip or tour of England.
In this road trip we get a blind serial killer priest spouting non-sequiturs, various odd ranting characters, a practical joker in a restaurant, an existentialist
ventriloquist dummy pontificating about our perception of time, a man on fire going to work, and various other odds and ends, all backed by the music obviously
and the usual boringly deadpan Neil Tennant. If you want to see what pop-music looks like when it gets pretentious, look no further.
It Couldn't Happen Here
A whole movie based on trashy redneck/hillbilly 'humor' featuring deranged backwoods families who wear cheap, repulsive masks, cross-dress, talk about idiotic or
random filthy subjects, tell tales, go on a feud and out-gross each other with a general lack of hygiene. One man tracks by licking filthy underwear, another blind
old man asks God for some company and gets the cross-dresser whom he mistakes for a young girl, etc. Spliced with this John Waters-like trash are random scenes involving
cheap aliens and anal probes, zombie impregnation sex and a nasty anal birth, and sprinklings of gore and bargain-basement surrealism. Tedious, unfunny trash.
Bizarre mess from Korea that starts as surreal exploitation with a hooker who gives specials in back alleys and meets up with her angry mutant teacher after
waking up his grandmother. They perform a strange dance, then she is killed by some giggling loons, is turned into a killing robot, goes through some scenes
ripped out of Nikita, then comes back for revenge with a mechanical penis. Boasts distorting and colorful cinematography, but it isn't as fun
as it sounds.
Killing Machine (AKA Teenage Hooker Became Killing Machine)
Necrophilia filmed as if it were a mystical and romantic experience. A girl grows up feeling
a twisted affinity with dead things and becomes a full-fledged necrophiliac as an adult. An idiotic
student falls for her but she prefers the dead so he figures out a way to make her love him...
Idiotic and unforgivable movie with filth posing as something beautiful.
Gritty movie about a psychotic who is released from jail. Angry and cynical, he decides to repay society's
lust for daring porn movies and sadism by making snuff movies. His acquaintances assume it isn't real at first, but
soon learn just how mad he and his psychotic friends are. Features an effective, disturbing atmosphere but is undone
by bad dubbing, shallow characters and lack of plot. The gore and nastiness is mostly off-screen except for one notorious scene where a
girl is cut up and taken apart in a kind of prototypical Guinea Pig. Supposedly cut from 170 minutes down to 77.
Last House on Dead End Street, The (AKA The Fun House)
A modern adaptation of Virgin Spring by Wes Craven and a very early 'landmark' in the twisted gore and horror genres.
This tells the tale of two over-confident girls that get raped, humiliated, mutilated and killed by a gang
of disturbed criminals and the girl's parents who take their bloody revenge on them. Much tamer by today's standards
but caused fainting and walk-outs when it first came out, this has the feel of a gritty, trashy Herschel Lewis film
featuring silly music, slapstick cops, unflinching humiliation, and death by chainsaw and oral sex.
Last House on the Left
A cult movie by Dennis Hopper which is actually more incoherent than anything brilliant. While in Peru, a man called Kansas is hired as an actor
in a violent Western. When the Americans leave, the locals use the sets for their own film but don't realize the action has to be faked.
In the meantime, Kansas's life becomes like a movie, hanging out with a Peruvian whore who wants American comforts, searching for gold,
going to parties and shows at the local whorehouse. Slowly his life becomes a movie as the cameras become fake, and his life shows its
seams with gaps of 'Missing Scenes', disorientation and surreal cuts. None of these themes and plotlines are developed however, and the extremely
choppy editing make this a chore to sit through.
Last Movie, The
A confusing, zero-budget, surreal mess where various repetitive scenes are weaved together into a nightmare. A guy's wife has slutty sex with his
brother, his brother is sliced and gutted by a strange man with a zombie philosophy, his wife keeps telling him the same phrases like "you're home
early", he has cravings for biting into flesh and dreams inolving blood feasts, zombies, guts, his beckoning wife, etc. as he keeps waking up from
dream after dream. With plot development and more than $100 for a budget, this could have become something Lynchian.
Living a Zombie Dream
A more comic Japanese Gummo with an over-the-top ending. Fragmented vignettes of a loser family involving two loser brothers, one wanting to be a
baseball star and the other, a manga artist. Scattershot scenes filmed on grainy home video, many ending in dumb slapstick, failure or trashy humor.
The brothers seek sage advise from a Visitor-Q-esque neighbour who instructs them on how to play baseball or have anal sex, they attempt to fulfill
their dreams, collect rent from an aggressive tenant who threatens to poison the water, and seduce girls by pretending to be disabled. The ending
features a bizarre spoof on a climactic battle featuring magic, brutal fights with pens and cameras, and over-the-top splatstick involving disemboweling
and decapitation. A terrible mess.
Love Song for Rapper
Boring sick movie about a lunatic who escapes the insane asylum and goes on a rampage killing people and raping the female corpses
after they're dead. In one scene he waits for the corpse to decompose and rot before he deems it ripe for fun.
Lucker (AKA Necrophagous)
Basically a series of dreamy mostly homo-erotic visions put on film as imagined by some guy with a love for outrageous costumes and sets. Two men enter a house
where they can peer through the looking glass into various rooms full of oddities: Wind-up mostly-naked human toys jittering on stage, strangely costumed
and colorful drag-queens or transexuals, some bizarre sci-fi settings and props, nuns and bishops getting it on, a mass of naked male flesh through a fish-eye
lens, various silly costumes and people playing games, an Egyptian pharaoh, some hetero hardcore porn, etc. all accompanied by strange sounds and soundtrack.
In other words, this is like Jack Smith on acid.
A slutty, married woman has sex with the decapitated head of her former lover while teasing a blind man.
And she is actually the healthier of the two sickos in this silly and pointlessly gruesome horror movie
that hs no plot to speak of.
This one is so bad, it's something like Ed Wood's attempt to make a bizarre headtrip of a movie. There is no originality here, only a jumbled bunch of copy-pasting from
other movies into something incoherent. The dialogue is cliched and cheesy, most of it stolen from other movies, with even a sampling from Star Wars. The acting by the two
parents hams it up to truly silly and campy proportions, but the rest of the cast seems to think they're in a serious movie. The story involves a Christ-like figure in a gas
mask on a quest with a treasure map that depicts a treasure chest with the word 'truth' on it (I kid you not). He is led to a home of a very broken family consisting
of disabled bitter father and lustful haughty mother, with a teenage daughter stuck in between. Scenes repeat, morph into nightmares, stuck in a loop, break off into strange
& bloody outcomes, there's sex in a gas mask, some twisted lusting by the mom, a lot of yelling and silly dialogue, a symbolic sub-plot about another warrior-quest dude that
meets a little girl with a bloody doll that goes nowhere, and then the surprise twist nonsensical ending that can't seem to decide whether it has to do with a horror cult or
a religious second coming of Christ. Terrible.
Machines of Love and Hate
Euro-sleaze with such unbelievable levels of stupidity that you'll split your sides laughing. A biker gang
gets entangled in a cycle of revenge and violence with a philanderer in a hot-rod, leading to rape, gore, karate,
penis-chopping, family massacres and lots of gratuitous nudity and sex. Features extremely dumb dialog
and possibly the worst dubbing job ever recorded.
Imagine a Korean Jodorowsky doing a new-age movie about the environment and spiritualism vs. destruction. This beautifully filmed, symbolic and surreal project
is new-age claptrap at its worst. Pure spirits are naked women swimming in clear waters, but business, medicine, science, internet, industrialism
and men are all corrupt, destructive, greedy and filthy, destroying the environment and all that is pure, and even eating meat (gasp). All this is
wrapped in a creation myth about Mago and 12 female (naked) spirits and how the earth became corrupt and the spirits went into exile. Pretentious, dumb,
preachy, misandrist, new-age excrement.
Artsy French perversion using the Oedipus Complex and other base Freudian instincts to contemplate on ...something or another.
A young man comes back home with idealistic worship of his mom only to learn she is a perverted bisexual slut and a lush. She tries to educate him
in the ways of life by pulling him into perversions with her wildly kinky and bisexual lover, only to find him diving into her life lessons
with wild abandon and nihilistic passion, soon to go out of control. She tries to re-adjust him with another neurotic girl who has a masochistic slave, etc.
Psychology, incest, philosophical musings, coprophilia, artsy pretentions and necrophilia. It would be disturbing if it made any sense or added up to anything.
A hatefully twisted precursor to Blue Movie by Alberto Cavallone. Society in all its forms is attacked. While festivities are going on in the streets,
various depraved people interact and have sex. There's a nymphomaniac, psychotic woman, a hypocritical policeman who uses whores, a priest that seems
to like the boys a tad too much, a man with a fetish for pictures of nude women and internal organs, a butcher that humps his frozen meat, some surreal
imagery involving female genitalia, billiard balls and an eyeball, and an unbelievable grand finale involving snuff coprophilia.
Man, The Woman, And The Beast, The
Strange Dutch sex-art-film which doesn't seem to fit in any category. There's a butcher shop, a lustful butcher that has sex in the meat locker and harrasses
his young female co-worker, there's a lust triangle, a murder, a detective and his unhappy marriage. Except the butcher and the detective are the same person,
the pretty young co-worker seems to welcome his sleazy advances and has wild kinks of her own, and at some point, the movie turns in on itself, making
less sense after its done. Most of the movie feels like some older fat guy's fantasies of treating women like meat, the movie making many visual parallels
to this effect, except the women welcome it and are only to happy to comply in order to supply the next unrealistic sex scene. There are surprises, including
a water-sports scene and a 'rape' scene that appear out of nowhere. The pseudo-Lynchian dream-logic doesn't do anything interesting either. Unrewarding and lurid.
A pointless sequel that has the Japanese butchers from camp 731 gather together for a reunion of sorts and rehash the original story,
this time with more gore and a cheesy love story. We see some of the same expirements again, freezing a woman's arms then striping off her flesh,
some splatter autopsy scenes, experimenting on Chinese prisoners with nasty diseases and chemicals, and testing guns on lines of live humans.
Nasty exploitation but not disturbing like the first, and flawed by cheesy drama.
Men Behind the Sun 2: Laboratory of the Devil
Rare, low-budget rock opera, with some passing thematic resemblances to Tommy, about a messianic figure made into a rock star. At first, the low budget makes
this feel like Alphaville in the sense that the pretentious, nonsensical narration tries to make up for what the visuals lack. But then it graduallly becomes weirder.
A man resigned to his fate and puppet-strings is sent on a mission to kill the Messiah, who is an anonymous silver-faced force of nature with some kind of prophetic,
moralizing message, but seems to cause social excesses wherever he goes. The encounters include a depraved discotheque-cum-orgy, junkyard mutants, a bizarre group of
stock merchants who sell air and water, a robotic marine-headmaster, a drug addict priestess Violet who gets the messiah hooked on drugs, and a despicable rock-concert
promoter, all acted over-the-top with campy costumes and makeup. The point of the movie seems to be about the power of rock stars, but portraying the messiah as a victim
of his own popularity and ideas seems to conflict with the passive, ego-maniacal, self-indulgent rock-star that he actually is.
Cult director of found-footage, sci-fi conspiracy films, Craig Baldwin, presents another one of his unique creations here, except this time, the subject matter is
occultist celebrities like Ron Hubbard, Marjorie Cameron, Jack Parsons and Aleister Crowley, their real-life relationships and views on life are warped into another
one of his sci-fi re-imaginings of history through wacko-conspiracy goggles. Combine this with decades of creating movies like this with a style all his own, and you
have one demented, hard-to-follow, harder-to-describe, nonsensical movie. The plot involves Hubbard's Mu moon colony powered by 'Mu poo pile' nuclear waste, and his
60s spy-style machinations to create a shuttle from Las Vegas and manipulate brain proteins with the help of said occultists (who have their own big plans involving new
technologies and moonchildren), Lockheed Martin, and Crowley (who lives under A-bomb testing grounds). There is a lot more, but like I said, this is nonsensical
mumbo-jumbo told via a barrage of home-made footage, voice-overs & narrative, and several tons of found (AKA stolen) footage from many old movies, documentaries
and soundtracks. You may enjoy this if you are one of those people that find thematic mix-tapes entertaining, but I was extremely bored by all the nonsense.
Mock Up on Mu
No, not a Mondo movie but a German low-budget stab at Richard Kern and trangressive surreal pornographic cinema.
Backed by a pounding soundtrack, we dive into the mind of a shocked virgin girl who sees lesbians going at it at a rock concert.
Everything she sees afterwards brings on sexual and bloody, violent, perverse fantasies and images.
There is no attempt to explain this strange world, which is occupied by about 5 women and a couple of faceless men. One girl walks around in a red bathing suit
all day with a special shoe to compensate for one shorter leg and works as a prostitute for a few gold coins (that aren't what they appear to be). Her mom is
depressed after she got fired from her job as Minnie Mouse at a fairground, and she regularly receives a strange medicinal procedure involving her blood going
through a machine in a big white room. Then there's a big 'Godmother' who tries to mother them both, and who likes to play in a makeshift small pool
even though water is scarce. Emotions flare, but the plot or the characters don't really develop after that. An empty oddity.
An old shocker about an insane deaf-mute who was abused as a child and has an unhealthy obsession over dolls and violence.
He has a crush on a local pretty girl who dances all day and has trouble with mean co-workers at the office.
When he discovers the joy in mutilating and toying with corpses, there's no turning back, and soon he is darting into funeral homes
to cut up the dead dolls, pull out eyeballs, and suck blood through a straw, thinking himself untouchable. The symbolism is crude however and I found
nothing of interest here.
Mosquito the Rapist
After a silly intro involving a man beating up a Schwarzenegger poster and the producer telling us that this film sucks, we get a short tale
about a dentist assistant and her burnt brother who is insane from pain and wears a KKK outfit after he was hit by a black car. She gets harassed
by sleazy patients and a door-to-door saleswoman but she soon discovers that by injecting her insane brother with her urine, she can command him
to do whatever she wants. So she makes him eat his own vomit and then kill her enemies in gory ways, including slicing up a face in a meat slicer.
Purposely goofy and bad in ways that almost goes beyond terrible into the realm of the cult. Almost.
My Lovely Burnt Brother and His Squashed Brain
Canadian weirdness that is like Zulawski's Possession by way of David Lynch, except it's not as intriguing, provocative or surprising. This is obvious, heavy-handed
symbolism telling the tale of a gay young boy with a secret attraction to his male friend. He resents his friend's attraction to girls and when, one day, he kisses him,
his friend splits into two identities, one of which is a sensitive, dying zombie-boy that he cares for and hides. His dead father always hovers disapprovingly, turning
various people into puppets (using scissors) in order to manipulate and disapprove of the boy's secret behaviour. Unrewarding and obvious surrealism.
Nature of Nicholas, The
More insanity from the Korean maker of Killing Machine. The nonsensical plot and random scenes mostly revolve around a man who angers some criminals because
of two eggs in a noodle pot, they smash his fingers and he goes looking for revenge by changing his penis into a gadget that shoots bullets when he ejaculates.
He soon finds that ballerinas are the equivalent of instant orgasms, that the penis is not all its cracked up to be, and becomes a perverse serial killer.
Other elements include a lustful mom, a histrionic brother who is half lion and gives carcasses as gifts, a cyber prostitute, splatter, sex, a gimp suit,
some bizarre fighting scenes with weird powers, and other random nonsense.
Never Belongs to Me
Grandrieux's sophomore experiment after Sombre is more extreme in its audio-visual primal experimentation. The movie is a patchwork of scenes, most of them
bleak, agitated, raw and dark. We see humans sold like pieces of meat, an endlessly despressing scene of a forced prostitute having her hair sliced off with
a knife, an American who falls for the whore, a disturbingly abusive client, some strange pimps and criminals, a strip-club and disco party, etc. Slowly
we piece together the cliched story of a boy who falls for a prostitute and who wants to save her from her pimps. Frantic and bestial passions are allowed
free reign, with the cinematography and sound intimately taking part in this primal fugue of life in the gutter, with even dogs being pushed to more
animalistic behaviour. But the characters are empty caricatures, the plot is non-existent, there are no insights or rewards, and the only thing this
avant-garde cinema achieves is to bring you down to its level. You can't elevate pornography to art by simply shaking the camera.
New Life, The
A portrayal of a schizophrenic's life and mind based on a schizophrenic's writings. Although it claims to be from inside her mind, this offers no insight
or in-depth exploration, and is content merely with a series of events, hallucinations and encounters that are as disconnected as she is. Veronika
tries various forms of suicide, wanders in and out of the psychiatric hospital and her parents' house, but mostly just wanders the world looking for
Jesus in every straggler and sad, forsaken male of society, getting nothing but exploitation and sex in return. One nasty scene involves pressured
sex soon after an abortion. The beginning and end of the movie wanders into hallucinations of things like strange painted men in the subway, and
gardening with dismembered hands. Bleak, gritty and raw, but pointless and unrewarding.
No Mercy No Future
Alain Guiraudie has a knack for creating stories and fantasy worlds out of mere dialogue, a simple location (usually outdoors), the mundane and the quirky.
After some light half-length experiments, his first full-length movie is a freeform movie about a superficial teenage slacker who is afraid to sleep in
case it's his last, and who spends the entire movie running through a confusing barrage of locations, identities and some absurd adventures. A whole village is
killed, he falls for an old man, he rides an airplane to a bar in the middle of a field without taking off, a big wave takes his friend away,
he is hunted by various eccentrics and thugs, people seem to die, but then they don't, etc. But there's no depth of character, ideas or story,
only annoying whimsies, endless banal dialogue, and faux-creativity. Pointless.
No Rest for the Brave
So what if Beverly Hills 90210 featured a kaleidoscope of bisexual, sex-starved, extremely neurotic,
nihilistic, foul-mouthed, angst-ridden teens with various personality disorders? And to top it all off
some of them run around killing and raping or getting abducted by aliens? You get this movie of course,
a pointless, repulsive but stylish piece of garbage with non stop depraved sex, violence, teen-chatter
and drug-induced weirdness.
It doesn't get much more experimental and annoying than this. There's a narrative in here somewhere about a white man called Zohommm!!!, a black man called
Grrr???, a woman called Shuick..., and their love triangle. There's seduction, friendly plotting, then suspicion and suicide (by self-decapitation), then
they somehow get their heads put back in place but on the wrong bodies with the help of some electronic being, and the love triangle continues with
even more confusion. But the narrative is deliberately deconstructed and consciously sabotaged over and over until it becomes incomprehensible. The goal
seems to be some kind of Dadaism of cinema, without the politics and philosophy. In addition, whim reigns supreme like a kind of stream-of-consciousness
mixtape put together over the course of 10 years, the director splicing together bits and pieces of random scenes, weird images, cartoons, documentary footage
of film-makers and revolutions, mystical symbolism, and other odds and ends, then re-cut up again in an attempt to achieve ultimate confusion, surprise
and lack of cohesion. The images rarely add new dimensions to the images, but mostly just attack in a barrage. This isn't the manifesto it wants to be,
it's cinematic masturbation. This would go well with Venom and Eternity.
'Avant-garde', absurd movie about... nothing in particular. A man wanders from scene to scene in different roles and with different people who say things that only
a deeply drugged person would find meaningful while they act out absurdities. He is a secret agent with many sticks of dynamite, he keeps encountering a girl
in different roles but he always seems to want to ball her, he joins a revolutionary gang that get their mission instructions by forming words made of alphabet soup
(and then eat it to understand the message), he blackmails the girl into sex by acting a cop, he marries the girl because a stick of dynamite didn't blow up his head,
there's a cryptic but good-natured Native American that teaches him the joys of esoteric mumbo-jumbo, peyote, the story of Jonah and the whale, and more non-sequiturs,
he develops a sixth sense and has the ability to win jackpots every time, and so on. If the movie has a point, I have no clue what it is, and neither, I suspect, does
the film-maker. Perhaps someone took LSD, scribbled some thoughts while under the influence, then collected all the scribblings and made a screenplay out of it.
Out (AKA Deadly Drifter)
Australian oddity by actors that look like something between 80s punks and village people, attempting to make a camp cult movie a la Rocky Horror Picture Show.
The story revolves around a mysterious Dingo woman (a playmate) who spends most of the movie dressing and undressing while most of the cast try to bed
her for different reasons. There are the parents who tried to kill her as a baby, a punk-master of the occult who thinks she's the center of a spiritual
event, a short blonde Hitler-clone with a Pinocchio nose, lesbian Nazis who want to inseminate her for the Third Reich, horny Dingo incestual pagans, a Tarzan,
a mad scientist, and other assorted strange characters and plotlines involving the Christian Trinity, sacrifices, actors, and spiritual powers. Tries too hard
to be off-the-wall and funny.
Bertolucci's most experimental feature by far, modelled after Godard. It's a freewheeling piece about everything and nothing that lacks coherency. The movie consists of
an insane young man and his antics with his doppelganger, aided by Bertolucci's rich visual sense. Themes such as our alter egos and their capabilities that extend beyond
our own, ideas that take on a life of their own, masochism and suffering caused by our own hands, theatre and film used to manifest ourselves and our ideas, all linked
to politics and revolution, are all touched, but never developed. Instead, the movie is as schizophrenic and random as its protagonist. He kills or abuses on a whim,
makes statements about theatre from behind a tower of books, fights with his own huge shadow, turns his landlord into a slave, who drives him to a date by rolling the car
downhill because he can't drive, then makes driving sounds while the wacko verbally abuses his masochistic date and gets her to smell his armpits. He teaches unorthodox
acting as well as how to make a molotov cocktail to a class, sets up a guillotine for his double, while a girl makes speeches about the destructive qualities of
commercial detergents and frolics in soap suds. Empty and unrewarding. Someone should have told Bertolucci that the French New Wave was about being an auteur, not
about making glossy photocopies.
Nina Menkes's movies are usually insufferably dull and pretentious endurance tests with light touches of near-surrealism, but here she improves slightly and also develops
more surrealist techniques. It's still a punishingly slow, plotless and humorless exploration of a lifeless, navel-gazing female character though. Lulu is a braindead and
disaffected Russian beauty who seems to be as bored by her boyfriend's endlessly mechanical lovemaking as he is of her. She deals cards mechanically at a casino to lifeless
people, her mother is an overbearing nightmare, and her sister is a self-mutilating medicated mess. Surrealistically, she steps over snakes on her way home, has floating
experiences where she disappears into thin air, or dreams of being swept away by a river and strangled by her mother who is swarming with bees and talks to her mirror.
The rest is just some endlessly long scenes where nothing happens and nothing meaningful is conveyed.
An underground, darkly atmopsheric B&W short by Rozz Williams who used this film to release his almost Dadaist fantasies of sadism and murder
before killing himself. A man uses a bizarrely illustrated book to inflict several sadistic games and tortures on another man.
While this goes on, we are treated to severe camera angles and overly artistic twistedness in the form of incomprehensible symbolism.
Artsy nonsensical movie with three intercut stories whose only common theme seems to be crime & punishment or sex.
The three stories are: A documentary about a kid that shoots his father for attacking his cheating wife and then literally
flies out the window, a horror movie about a scientist that isolates the sex drive in liquid form then drinks it and
becomes a leper, and a prison story of obsessive homosexual lust and abuse. The movie is full of strange events, dark moods,
repulsive scenes, and artsy nonsensical quotes and dialog that add up to nothing at all.
What the...? A live-action role-playing (LARP) movie where the players go bad and insane. It's like a group of drugged geeky students with ADD and no budget
decided to film a Dungeons & Dragons version of Videodrome/Existenz. Plot threads don't even get a chance to unravel, as the characters just say whatever nonsense
is in their head and switch to another 'movie' on a whim. This movie starts with a girl beating the crap out of a teddy bear in bondage, then proceeds to some kind of girly
TV show about 'pony games' and some of its obssessed girly fans. Except that the boys in the troupe keep undermining the childish games with their hormones, and one
Dominatrix seems a little too depraved and evil for their unicorn fairy tale roles. Before you know it, there is some blair-witch prancing in the dark woods, forced cross-dressing
and humiliation, then gritty and gory violence involving dismemberment, disemboweling and head-crushing, then some kind of robot gang war with cyborgs and terminators.
Don't ask how it all fits together because it doesn't. Excruciatingly bad - one of those movies that makes you feel that you lost IQ points.
A curiosity led by the colorful Tomata Du Plenty who splices together a hodge-podge of strange performances, musical-videos, beatnik-like poetry and monologues,
video-art and various footage while telling the history and future of America as it revolves around him meeting Sheela. Old footage is mixed with 80s-punk renditions
of old songs, Tomata performs in his bunker while various bathroom appliances fly in the air and work on him, then he tells of an apocalyptic future of which he
is supposedly the only survivor, during which doctors performed experiments on people until they mutated and girls got breasts for eyes. Odd but mostly uninteresting.
Yuri Ilyenko continues his cinematic style of fragmented snippets of a story presented poetically, only this time, he emphasizes obtuse and pretentious theatrics.
This is based on the history of Hetman Mazepa, a controversial 18th century figure who was involved in the independence and joining of Ukraine, and the great war
with Russia and Sweden, although many see him as a traitor. But the events are dramatized in fragmented scenes involving artificial sets, theatrical props in natural
settings, colored strips over the film that make it look like a dreamy painting, melodramatic acting, symbolism, and some bizarre behaviour, especially in the surreal
ending that reminded me of a Ken Russell film. Symbolism includes fake heads and straw men being executed, a collection of decapitated heads of previous failed rulers,
naked abused women as a symbol of the country, a box placed over the ruler's head as the next head magically appears, etc. Not only incomprehensible, but also leaves
one clueless as to what the goal was, even if you manage to piece together the actual history and fill the huge narrative gaps on your own. An arthouse flop, if such
a thing exists, and the definition of theatrics, to the detriment of everything else.
Prayer for Hetman Mazepa, A
Retarded and insane musical filmed in grainy black & white with voice-over dubbing. Two hillbilly religious retards that constantly watch a demented and foul-mouthed preacher
on the television are visited by aliens that pose as the Virgin Mary in order to get what they want from the humans. They are sent on a mission to kill demons in human form
and collect puss from their heads and collect it in a bucket. In the meantime, a scientist, who expresses his love to his wife via descriptive biological functions, is on the
trail of the aliens, followed by the evil military. But you won't see much brain-draining unless your brain counts while you're watching this. Instead we follow the retards and
the scientist on various random, chaotic and boring outings. The extremely silly voice-overs with many cartoonish voices and accents basically MST3K their own movie, there is
a lot of random heavy music that drowns out the voice-overs, and they sometimes dress up in outrageous random drag outfits and break out into horrible song,
like some stoned rednecks attempting to duplicate the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Some highlights include a scene where one retard painfully brushes the knotted hair of the other
retard while they spout random nonsense, they visit a bar full of freaks and a gay KKK man, followed by an insane and depraved orgy where they carve out a nipple in graphic
but very low-budget gore. In short, this is a headache-inducing, terrible, terrible movie from all points of view, and it is a torture to watch.
Vastly overrated award-winning micro-cinema dares to make a sci-fi film for $2000. A repulsive man meets a repulsive girl (both inside and out), alternatively
fight and get the hots for each other, then find out they are long lost siblings. This is pointlessly set against a sci-fi backdrop of a futuristic New York occupied by
acid rain, genetic engineering, strange cockroaches, and flying vehicles. It also starts off with a darkly bizarre Lynchian atmosphere, including things like
a mysterious human tooth, a genetically engineered bug, dark lust, and walking on eggs in the park, but this soon peters out and along with the sci-fi, disappears
in favor of an ugly drama involving incest. Bad accents are used and then discarded, and the acting is weak. Suppedly part of a trilogy, and this may develop into
something interesting in the future, but as a stand-alone it's a horrible mess.
If Bad Taste consisted of mostly fart humor, this would be the result. An ugly, foul, trashy family
with a farm live their lives with filthy habits full of farts, burps, other bodily functions,
horrible living conditions and idiotic humor. To get more milk out of the goat, the farmer has sex with it
and the result is a half-man half-goat monster which grows to become an angry monster that wreaks its gory revenge
on the family.
Revenge of Billy the Kid
The ultimate cult movie made popular by the village people and a worldwide horde of cross-dressers. A repulsive campy horror spoof
about a couple stranded and caught in the clutches of a transvestite from the planet Transsexual accompanied by a circus
of mad, colorful characters and a Frankenstein monster with golden underwear. A mad night follows complete with immensely popular
musical numbers, kinky sexual adventures and lots of cross dressing. Dumb lunacy for the rest of us who are comfortable with our daily apparel.
Rocky Horror Picture Show
In some ways, this is like a surreal, mentally-challenged, pot-smoking version of Fellini's City of Women with a pocket-change budget and a dozen willing women.
The movie is so inept, it makes one wonder whether the surrealism was even intended. Two worm farmers are kidnapped by a cult of desert feminists and become
entangled in a nonsensical plot involving the mob, and a suitcase of platinum that gets confused with plutonium. They are repetitively threatened by an angry
feminist who hates men, tested with some off-screen undefined tests, adopted, and randomly offered sex by a group of very confusing women with some very confusing
rules and rituals, one of who bursts into random short outbursts of giggles, while others shoot spiders with a gun or ride motorcycles through the living room.
Scenes are constantly cut short before their payoff, and some of the dialogue and wisecracks seem to be spouted by a randomizer program on pot. The movie then
takes its thriller plot seriously for the ending, which features such low-budget action scenes, that most of them are not even shown.
Nazi-controlled Italy rounds up some youths and takes them to a castle for extreme sexual and sadistic experimentation and entertainment.
Probably the most extreme and sickening movie ever made. Based on De Sade's writings, this one features unwatchable explicit scenes of
true nihilism and depravity that start with bisexual sodomy and go on to humiliation, nauseating coprophilia, torture and snuff. Explores fascism,
themes of sex, body and politics, and De Sade's sadistic philosophies, but despite these artistic aspirations, this is the only movie with scenes
I had to fast-forward through. You can practically smell this one through the screen.
Two shorts by Clive Barker in his early years. Both are in grainy black and white with no dialog, and make use of various tricks
such as dark sound effects, negative exposure, grain and extreme lighting to achieve a dark dream-like effect (this predates Begotten).
The interpretation of Salome is too fast and obscurely hops from one dark scene to another, lingering only on the 'erotic' and death scenes.
The Forbidden is a precursor to Hellraiser, featuring a man who discovers a puzzle that opens various worlds of pleasure and pain.
The climax is a sickening, endless 10-minute long scene where a man's body is skinned slowly in layers. This is true underground
cinema but there isn't much of interest here.
& The Forbidden
Terrible, snail-paced, pretentious, post-apocalyptic sci-fi. In the first ten minutes we learn that there is a scarring disease, that people don't age, and that there are pockets
of isolated survivors and powers-that-be that try to control and fence-off the rest of them. For the next 70 minutes, we learn nothing new except that the moody protagonist
has a very warped Freudian relationship with his non-aging diseased mother which involves lust and murder. The rest of the time is filled with slow scenes of nature, dreams,
uninteresting conversations with a terrible actor, memories of his mother and father, pretentious poetry and pseudo-philosophy, and scenes about nothing in particular.
In other words, this is a very dreary mood-piece with pretentions of Tarkovsky but is so full of itself it doesn't realize how empty it is.
Scars of Youth
And here I thought the Japanese had the market cornered in extreme perversion. This movie is a catalogue of the most extreme, sick and twisted sexual perversions
not known to man, all of them given an extra boost into darkness, and all backed by some great effects and acting to make this movie not only vile, but disturbing.
An aging porn-star is drafted by a mysterious porn-producer who thinks porn can be extreme art and a statement on life. The ex-star soon finds himself in over
his head and unable to quit as the producer and his henchmen devise one sick scene after another. I'll provide some short descriptions of scenes, and it's safe
to say that you should assume the worst: A penis used as a killing weapon, gory death during sex, surprise incestual sodomy, pedophilia, extreme S&M and
humiliation, 'newborn porn', and more. This is one of those movies almost all sane people will wish they hadn't seen. I realize this will be seen as a recommendation
to some, but I mean it.
Serbian Film, A
Turkish arthouse sounds like a contradiction to some, but this movie is a bizarre horror movie weaving poetic non-linear threads and strange other-wordly
logic with near-Lynchian moments. It's difficult to piece together the elements and story from this confusing movie, and I am pretty sure most of it comes
from bad movie-making and storytelling rather than from the deliberately circular and poetic structure. There is an 800 year old Byzantine child-vampire-princess,
some secret scrolls promising ultimate power of knowledge but killing everyone that even translates two words in it, a confusing conspiracy involving
a woman and her son who may or may not be dead or a vampire, a cult that is after the scrolls, and competing vampiric emissaries. Crumbling historical buildings,
old languages and strange night-life also add to the atmosphere, complete with Lynchian sound effects, but in the end, not much of the confusion is lifted.
Serpent's Tale, The
Well what can you expect with a name like that? Japanese campy gore-horror-sleaze about a dumb group of back-packers in the woods
that encounter a parasite that lives in... female genitalia. The infected then seduce and tear apart their victims. This is similar
to Cronenberg's Shivers but with campy gore and exploitative sex and nudity. Theoretically this would deliver to fans of the genre
but the nudity isn't a pretty sight and the whole affair is silly and too low-budget.
Sexual Parasite: Killer Pussy
A collection of about 50 mind-warpingly useless web-shorts on DVD, each ranging in length from 1 to 4 minutes, from a mentally deficient and
damaged, transsexual camera-whore. Shaye Saint John in a mask and mannequin body parts, and his half burnt doll Kiki, prance and babble on in
front of the camera in a very annoying high-pitched distorted voice. Each short covers some banal or bizarre topic, repeating the same lines and
images ad nauseum in a frenzy of editing techniques, warped cinematography, psychedelic colors and sounds. Feeding the cat is one such facinating
topic, others include getting a new dress or putting on makeup, pretending to be a phone operator or acting out some other role, or bizarre things
like 'wire therapy' and the 'horrifying' telekinetic powers of Kiki (soda bottles floating on a string). In summary, this is like some self-obsessed
retarded Jack Smith/Warhol flick on acid, or something comparable to Dandy Dust without the sci-fi and gore. A waste of molecules.
Shaye & Kiki
An underground Italian tribute to Fulci and D'Amato consisting of an anthology of short and disgusting comedy-splatter
vignettes. A monster carnivorous purse, a mutant, slimy blow-up doll from hell, a cannibalistic virus, a transvestite doctor
and a coprophagic psychotic all strut their stuff in this extremely silly and ploddingly repulsive hodge-podge.
Unrealistic, sleazy piece of trash about a dwarf and his mother who kidnap women by enticing them with toys,
lock them up, then inject them with drugs and make money off them as unwilling whores. A poor, married couple move into the same building
and cross paths with this nasty duo with dire consequences.
Sinful Dwarf, The
François Ozon frequently injects depravity and violence into his movie characters (especially women) for no good reason, so it comes as no surprise to me
to find that he directed this absurd farce that blames a white rat for the deterioriation and reinvention of a conventional and happy 'sitcom' family.
A father brings home a lab rat who immediately starts to transform the family members. One child becomes a gay artist, the other a suicidal sadomasochist.
Orgies take place, incest, kinky dreams and near-surreal sexual shenanigans that include the maid and various guests. The father is the only person who
remains unaffected, in discord with the family that finds happiness in kink and group therapy, so of course, the ending is only to be expected. Except it
has a bizarre twist. Does Ozon really think his movies are sexually subversive? Empty, stupid and pointless.
It's the future. An insane brutal cop with 16 tongues grafted onto his body after a near-fatal accident stays in a hotel where
you have to pay to switch off the porn, and interrogates suspects by forcing them to perform fellatio. A lesbian duo of internet hacker
and criminal robot killer cross paths with this man and the sparks fly. The ideas are ludicrous and don't make sense, the nudity is not sexy,
and the pace and cinematography is slow and amateurish.
Chad Ferrin continues to make muscular and edgy trash. His movies feel like old-school grindhouse in the way they balance shock, camp, depravity and entertainment, except
they're without that trendy and artificial retro-look. This one is more like his first Unspeakable in terms of shock value, but with more sophisticated cinematography.
Some students discover an experimental drug used disastrously in the past and which resulted in mysterious sexual violence. Drugs and hallucinations mix with guaranteed-to-offend
rape scenes involving monster genitalia always used fatally and on the same sex. Ferrin uses sound, editing and cinematography tricks to disorient while the movie
keeps you on your toes with both unbelievably tasteless violence and confusing reality-twists and hallucinations. If all you are expecting is unique and shocking trash,
then I suppose this delivers, but it never does anything but wallow in the gutter.
Someone's Knocking at the Door
Mostly baffling and impenetrable Japanese art movie by the art director that worked with Shuji Terayama. The best explanation I could come up with
is that a young man is on an inner journey as he searches for meaning in love, eroticism and marriage. He boards a train, and all the clocks are
mirrored from then on, as if looking at them from the inside. He travels to a homey village, meets a potential fiancée, then a more sensuous and mysterious
stripper. Some enigmatic statements are made, there's a naked child that keeps appearing, lengthy stripper shows are shown, one maturely sensuous, the
other more enrgetic, crude and young. There's a bizarre impromptu game with masks and a dwarf that's not quite Kabuki, some interaction with elders, odd
encounters with a woman selling ciagrettes, and other random artsy, often visually rich symbols and incoherent artsiness. There is some homage paid to
Terayama, but I couldn't get much out of this one. Perhaps I am missing something because I am not Japanese.
Soul Odyssey, The
If John Waters were a retarded 15 year old, this may have been the movie he would make. The budget almost makes Schiff's movies
look like blockbusters. Twin brothers visit their necrophiliac grandmother who drugs and molests them, while her homosexual farm-hand
chops up passers-by, has sex with their decapitated heads and organs, and rapes one of the twins. This would be vile or disturbing if the movie had even
an ounce of talent but if ever you need a benchmark to know how bad movies can get, this is it.
Jon Jost's most experimental film-essay by far. Allegedly a visual essay on communication, language, roles and theatre and supposedly
portrays a woman who is unleashed when she assumes a stage character. But what we actually get is a bunch of actors against a black background improvising
various nonsense for almost the complete running time of the movie, involving miming, making faces or uttering gibberish, except for one scene where a woman
is harrassed by men in various roles talking nonsense, some endless 'magic' tricks, a super-slow-motion scene of a man getting a pie in the face that takes several minutes,
and another scene where a man reads from the bible in Hebrew while red liquid is dropped on the Hebrew text. I would guess they were told to express themselves on
stage at the most primal level to see what emerges, and the result is embarrassingly annoying and endless. It is movies like these that make me hate the intellectual
Avant-garde theatrics at their most obscure, pretentious and unrewarding. There is no discernable plot, and it's all about the mood, acting and symbolism.
In this case, the mood is anxiety. A woman is subjected to scene after scene of discomfort, tension, awkwardness and confusion. The actual content isn't important,
and the nonsensical dialogue usually feels improvised, as long as it evokes the appropriate reaction and mood. She has a birthday party where the guests perform
unhappy and tense songs and games, and her husband makes her dance with her stiff doctor. There is a trip on a train that goes nowhere for days and the passengers
are all eccentric and unpleasant. A troupe of older women keep appearing yelling 'Jesus Christ, my feet hurt!'. Other nonensical exchanges involve signing a newspaper,
or being forced to dance and sing while climbing up a wall, or images of her performance on stage as a chicken juxtaposed with her wedding. This nightmare builds
to a sort of frenzy and depression, but it's all painfully and unwatchably repetitive, since the effect was achieved in the first five minutes and then never
develops further, besides throwing around more symbolism that only makes sense to the director.
As the director put it, this is an attempt to catch the darkest subconscious side of people with brutal honesty. First, the left-right brain dichotomy
is explained, the left side said to be in need of exploration as a woman's womb is cut open and an eyeball pulled out (what this means is beyond me). Then
a man ruminates on the ultimate evil against creation (killing a baby as it is born) and concocts a plan to commit said evil on his sister for whom he has
incestual fantasies. He also is both fascinated and scared by her menstrual cycle. After this nasty bloody sequence, some nature worshippers have an orgy
with nature which bleeds on them. And finally, the hypocrisy of religious people is portrayed as a masturbator loses himself in twisted guilty fantasies
where his penis is shredded and Jesus is cannibalized and urinated on by naked frenzied women. What does all this add up to? Not much. The points are
shallow and could have been made without the series of extremely shocking and gross-out images. Jodorowsky at least had fascinating or wild imagery, this
is just a collection of shallow gross-outs.
Two intercut stories of bizarre repulsive satire that never make sense. One features a beauty queen that goes from a hygiene-obsessed tycoon who urinates
on her, through various stages to a commune (Vienna Actionists) that regularly participate in a banquet of vomit, feces and urine, and pretend they are
babies. The other story features a madwoman who lures people onto her boat to discuss obsolete politics and to participate in sex, murder and child molestation.
Supposedly a political satire where all of the above symbolizes Capitalism, Communism and the likes, but everything is disgustingly explicit and bizarre.
Unusually bizarre Anime with over-the-top cutesy animation and kittens, mixed with adult themes of violence and a chaotic sci-fi setting. On CatEarth, a planet run
by a super-corporation Catty and Co., Tamala is a strange, whimsical kitten who goes on a voyage and befriends Michelangelo while being pursued by a hungry police-dog.
The rest is an incoherent mess suffering from ADD: There are many short scenes that lead nowhere, characters like a Dark God of Death pop-up then disappear,
some of Earth's history is re-invented (brand-names and the Loch Ness monster), a dog has some S&M with a mouse, some typically over-convoluted armageddon anime-mythology
is established but nothing is done with it, a cat grows old, develops maggots and starts falling apart for no reason, etc. This would go well with We Are The Strange.
Tamala 2010: A Punk Cat in Space
Lust, fire-shooting penis, gory evisceration of a pig, pedophilia, sex with fat lady and with pig remains, speed-eating contests, gorging, vomiting techniques,
more fat sex, taxidermia, lots of dead things, gore, extreme fat, death, artistic self-mutilation. Although this barrage of shocking and disgusting scenes
is filmed wonderfully, artistically and creatively, and there are claims of all this being some kind of allegory, this doesn't change the fact that this is still merely
a collection of gross-outs. The narrative involves three generations of twisted people (sex-maniac with a fetish for fire, speed-eating olympic champion,
and taxidermist) but there is no thread that ties things together into some kind of plot.
Ten, wildly varied short dreams from Japan that aren't very dream-like. They range from artsy, confusing meditations about the cycles of time and health,
to infantile madness involving a strange man who sculptures religious statues by dancing techno, to the tale of an overly handsome man who is fed human-flesh
with spit and attacked by a farting female human who turns into a pig, to dark nightmares about haunting bad pregnancies and the killing of a kid, to a
Final-Fantasy-like manga. Mostly pointless or dull weirdness with nice cinematography. Just because you can write down a chaotic dream you had that does
not make it interesting. Kurosawa did this much, much better with his Dreams.
Ten Nights of Dream
A somewhat enigmatic and ambiguously symbolic film by Pasolini. A stranger visits an upper class family and proceeds to fulfill each of their psychological
needs, all represented by sex. When he leaves, they all fall apart (the mother turns into a desperate slut, the son grasps at art
but ends up urinating on his painting, etc), except for the maid who leaves the house and turns into a country saint, levitating and peforming miracles.
The meaning seems obvious, the stranger representing religion/God bringing something crucial to each of the family members and portraying how they handle a
life without religion (with only the lower class maid emerging strong). But the seduction tactics seem more devilish than god-like and the
intellectual insights are shallow.
Both goofy and bizarre, this B&W oddity tries too hard to pay homage to cheesy old horror or Twilight Zone episodes as well as to be a cult item
a la Eraserhead. The story simply involves a babysitter who has to deal with a monstrous baby, but the focus is on the interesting cinematography
and quirky characters and sets. Odd sculptures decorate the house, machines seem like they're from the 50s and the future, and strange scenes involving
fluids or odd people in masks are spliced into the movie. It simply doesn't go together though: The unsubtle acting, the cheesy horror, the miles of
boring dialog all undo the bizarre atmosphere.
That Little Monster
A free-form, schizophrenic hodge-podge of sexual fantasy revolving around a submissive woman who may or may not be a nun with narcolepsy. The movie
wanders from silly attempts at blasphemous kink, to nunsploitation, laughable domination and humiliation scenes with weak Story of O ambitions, a
dreamy lesbian encounter in a castle, a fling with a Yeti a la Borowczyk, to a colorful theater of extreme and ugly kink, masochism and perversions.
In between scenes we get random kaleidoscopic montages to make it look artsy, and various cinematography filters and effects are used at random.
The acting is bad and unconvincing. In short, a bad movie that isn't as avant-garde, erotic or surreal as it thinks it is up until the last few minutes
when it veers into Lynch territory.
Three Trials, The
If John Waters had gotten stoned out of his mind and decided to write a hardcore pornographic comedy tribute to
Rocky Horror with miles and miles of hammy and artifical dialogue, this may have been the result. This notoriously deranged
grainy black and white movie features a group of strangers that get caught during a storm in a strange house full of sex toys and perverts
and soon occupy their time indulging in every sex act possible. Blow-up dolls, sex-starved gorillas, oral sex, gay sex, cucumbers and penis
enlargement machines serve as distractions while they ramble on endlessly about pickled husbands, lust, circus stories,
or nothing in particular, even while indulging themselves.
Swingers get together in a mansion belonging to a strange old 'Uncle' who hosts all-night orgies and
asks couples to act-out bizarre sexual fantasies for which he gives them a reward from a toy box.
These fantasies include sex with a possessed bed (huh?), a butcher who hangs dead girls corpses like meat
then has sex with them, murder during oral sex, etc. But why are corpses and decapitated heads appearing out of nowhere?
Why does the uncle lack eyes and seem deceased? What's up with the 50 foot naked woman? Is it all a cruel alien conspiracy?
A totally off-the-wall & bizarre softcore porn flick that isn't as interesting as it sounds due to the low budget.
Toy Box, The
This is the kind of film that gives arthouse cinema a bad reputation. An endlessly boring gay love story that delves into symbolic folklore and mysticism
to explore desire and love. For the first half, we get a slow Ming-liang Tsai-esque depiction of a soldier who falls for a country boy, with slow scenes
that observe their daily mundane lives, until it's time to crawl into a scary metaphysical tunnel with looming dangers. Then suddenly we are transported
into the jungle where the soldier and his love, who is now part shaman, part tiger, part ghost, take turns hunting each other, having to deal with various
fears, talking monkeys, cow ghosts and jungle dangers before finally accepting personally scary passions. Tedious and pretentious.
Apichatpong Weerasethakul's follow-up to Tropical Malady has a similar empty-headed, tedious and unrewarding approach to symbolic magical-realism. Of course, since
it deals with Buddhism, past lives, reincarnation as animal spirits, death, and the spiritual world, and it has a meditational (translation: painfully slow)
pace, many are praising this movie because, as we know, anything that deals with Buddhism is cool. But the Emperor has no clothes. Uncle Boonmee is dying,
various creatures and spirits visit him, either as representations of past lives, or people he knew, both living and dead, and then he goes into a cave
as a metaphor for his death and rebirth. The movie blends the mundane, the modern and the magical in a gentle world that isn't afraid of death, and this is
the movie's only good point. Other than that, it's as simple as the above description, and it has nothing to say. Of course, if you want to watch a movie
where people have mundane conversations with men in a 'monkey spirit' suit, where princesses have sex with a fish spirit, and monks take a shower then project
themselves astrally to a pop-music diner, be my guest.
Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives
A group of radical Austrians (including Otto Mühl and Kurt Kren) who claimed 'art is flesh and blood' and made a series of vile short films consisting of
men and women at their most animalistic and disgusting, their naked bodies wallowing in various liquids and substances,
exploring various perversions and fetishes, coprophilia, eating their own vomit, having sex in front of babies, etc.
Some of these creatures established communes for like-minded people and one got arrested for pedophilia. A charming
artistic movement, their shorts now compiled on DVD.
A plotless, experimental film from Richard Linklater that raises a bewildering range of philosophical, existential, social and new-age questions. At least that's what
the movie wants you to think. The actual product annoyed me in much the same way as his follow-up 'Before Sunset' did, which featured a romantic couple that had a real
encounter ten years ago, except now they are just self-obsessed and pretentious, talking in half-baked, seemingly thoughful monologues but never actually communicating.
Except here, it's surreal. For starters, the real actors are rotoscoped in a way that makes them hazily unreal, their animated details constantly shimmering, distorting,
and vibrating. The protagonist wanders in a constant dream-state, waking up into another dream, interacting with various people that provide sound-bites, thoughts,
absurd situations, random aphorisms, and Zen-like advice, while trying to stop himself from floating into the sky. This is like a pothead, freshman attempt at a
latter-day Godard movie. The various ideas range from basic and familiar freshman stuff, to brainless new-age twaddle, to vaguely humorous, to moderately interesting
except the movie doesn't give us time to digest and develop and these rare moments are few and far between. This will appeal to pothead philosophers with ADD, but that's
an easy crowd to please.
Extreme narcissism played over-the-top by way of American Psycho for some kind of satirical effect, but the result is banal disgust rather than anything
insightful or witty. Jonathan Barrows is an arrogant narcissist acted by an obviously gay man, who is repulsed by both men and women, because he is in
love with himself, to the point that he masturbates to videos of himself masturbating, and has sex with a blow-up doll with a picture of his face on it,
all graphically depicted in this trashy movie. The movie plays along with his fantasy that everyone wants him, and features endlessly pathetic scenes of
one annoying lamer hick piece of trash after another try to seduce him while Jonathan arrogantly rejects them with long words and twisted insults. This
is backed by cartoonishly trashy scenes of his parents and babysitters trying to get him laid in some demented John Waters-esque filth. I waited a whole
hour for some kind of payoff, but then it only veers into serial killer territory featuring forced feeding of sliced penises and toes.
Sci-fi surrealism filmed as a documentary. Actually, this feels like some guy sharing his dream/stoned vision with heavy narrative accompanied with a barrage of
short filmed scenes, found footage and cheap computer graphics all spliced together with a meticulous editing job. We learn about James Maker, his inherited
beekeeping job, his associations with the 'supernormal society', as well as his real job working with flight simulations for NASA and missiles. Along the way
we learn in detail about all of his ancestors and past lives. A strange experience with his bees gives him a second sight via an internalized 'bee television'.
The rest of the movie is a hodgepodge of mysticism, occultism, personal visions, new-age baloney and pretentious pseudo-philosophy dealing with messages from the bees,
ghosts (including the victims of missiles come back to haunt the simulated worlds), his projection as a bomb sent to kill someone (it takes over 45 minutes
of visions just to learn who he is meant to kill), Mesopotamian bees, something to do with the moon, karma, time-travel and spiritual journeys through deserts and
caves, becoming an X, a poem, a lump of wax, etc etc. Imagine someone describing his personal symbolic dream which he thinks is terribly important, in a monotone and in excruciating
detail. Let's say it is interesting enough for five minutes, and add another five because it is accompanied by a visual presentation, but then you realize you have
75 more minutes to bear. Excruciatingly boring.
Wax, or the Discovery of Television Among the Bees
Ming-liang Tsai directs an artsy study on, presumably, longing and perversion, love and connection replaced with imitation and fetish. Taiwain is
plagued by a water shortage but a surplus of watermelons. One girl obsessively gathers water bottles, while she longs for her neighbour who is a porn
star. Both try to open a locked suitcase in a heavy-handed metaphor. Watermelons become replacements for water, erotica, romance, simulated pregnancy
and in one pornographic scene, a girl's vagina. Characters break into song dressed in gay dance extravaganzas to express their longings and problems,
while the porn and madness continues on mechanically. The theme would be interesting except that there's no focus or consistency. Notorious for its
shocking and confusing pornographic ending.
Wayward Cloud, The
A unique movie created with a strange mixture of anime-style animation, 3d computer graphics, stop-motion animation, cut-outs, and graphics that look like
computer games from the 70s and 80s. The story is almost non-existant and involves a girl with a strange disease abused by an evil pimp. She runs away and
meets a doll-boy who communicates using squeaks and searches for ice-cream, while a warrior fights various evil forces in the bizarre city full of trippy
decorations and strange monsters. Most of the movie is just weird visuals and crazy fighting sequences. It fails on almost every level though because there
is no interesting plot, it doesn't bring a world or characters to life but reinvents them every minute, making this the ultimate A.D.D. movie, and the voices
sound like they're made by a teenager who watched too many cartoons and has way too much time on his hands. There was obviously lots of work involved
in creating this but I got bored after 5 minutes. This is the worship of freeform acid-induced imagination taken to a dull extreme.
We Are The Strange
A farmer is followed with a camera while he handles his daily chores, bathes, feeds the animals, eats, plays games, places doll heads on birds,
plays bizarre games with his animals, chases his pig around, has sex with the pig, takes care of the resulting piglets, kills some animals,
prepares tea and food out of his own feces, collects dead things in jars, eats various repulsive things and vomits. There is no dialog, only a bizarre soundtrack.
This probably has some artistic symbolism or message, but frankly, I don't care what it is.
You'll be calling this movie's name several times while watching this baffling oddity by Polanski. Even his movie The Tenant was mostly grounded in reality, but this one
is just bonkers for its own sake. Allegedly a sex-comedy homage to Alice in Wonderland, but it is not funny and has nothing in common with that story except for the fact that
it is full of nonsense and strange characters. Nancy, acted by the doll-like Sydne Rome, is travelling in Italy when she finds herself in an absurd adventure in a strange villa
where people make less and less sense. However, she is just in the movie to be treated with one humiliation after another with a passive and dumb demeanor. It starts with an
attempted gang rape by a group of very strange people, her clothes are then systematically stolen so that she is never fully dressed throughout the movie, and the various
characters can then poke, prod, stare, comment, slap, fondle, paint her left leg blue, and treat her to S&M, or oral sex while she is sleeping. Polanski even has her crawl
out of a dog kennel with the camera placed behind her. Mastroianni acts as a bizarre pervert that enjoys kinky roleplays and squashing ping-pong balls while covered in
mosquito bites which may be syphillis, Polanski is his eccentric enemy called Mosquito, Hugh Griffith is a dying old man in a wheelchair but that doesn't stop him from
chasing her either, and there is a whole lot of other tenants that add to the mind-warp, including a maid that sprays the air with shaving cream. The only reason to watch
this movie is for its unique form of mind-warping absurdity, but I can't say that it was interesting, rewarding or funny.
What? (AKA Diary Of Forbidden Dreams)
What if I told you that this was a bizarre movie of Jodorowsky proportions, as acted by a cast of people with Down's syndrome, and directed by none other than
Crispin Glover? What if you also knew that this contained a scene of a monkey-mask wearing woman with large breasts stroking the penis of a man with Down's syndrome
who is lying in a big seashell while clouds of love-making actors drift by and while Glover plays the most extremely racist song you ever heard? I have an interpretation for
this movie and I don't mean it as a joke: It represents the psyche of Crispin Glover, his many sides, inner voices and personas. The black-faced minstrel who is trying
to transform into an invertebrate using snail injections is obviously his public entertainer persona, whom he seems to mostly hate, which would explain the racist/Nazi
aspects of this movie, and he sees his various other inner voices (or perhaps the people in his life) as retards that commit various acts of violence or lust against
each other while Glover sits on top as the annoyed super-ego. There is also lots of snail abuse with salt, or attacks on snails by force or praying mantis (despite
the fact that the 'young man' loves snails), and the praying mantis even surprise-attacks a Down's Syndrome person. I would guess that snails represent his crushed
dreams. Then there's the repetitive Nazification of Shirley Temple, another attack on his entertainer figure who was whisked away by the industry. Glover keeps talking about
how he wanted to provoke people in this movie to take them out of the comfort zone and start asking questions, and how it's all about the shock for its own sake, but I know better.
If you thought Crispin Glover was eccentric and weird, then you were wrong. He is insane.
What Is It?
Transgressive, repulsive and depressed arthouse Japanese movie with nothing to say except how depraved and warped life and religion could be. A young man who may or may
not be a criminal is used sexually by priests that adopted him in a bizare commune seemingly populated by perverts, and he in turn pours out his bile on other people
by beating up dogs, raping nuns, smashing the teeth of a friend, and coming up with evil ways to torment a priest by faking confessions. There are moments of friendship
and tenderness but these are very quickly smashed or warped by a misanthropic, hateful mind, and he in turn is beat up by a very strange scoutmaster who likes spit and
vomit, while they all toil every day shoveling excrement from the farm animals, and castrate pigs while the pigs are trying to have sex. There you have it.
Whispering of the Gods, The
Wannabe Basket Case-type of warped campy horror. A brothel madam, in love with an Elvis Impersonator that likes to mix the wrong pills with alcohol, gives birth to a mutated
girl who grows up with her twin embedded inside her, thinking that she is the daughter of a Chinaman. When this creature is finally let out, it turns out to be a mutated,
perverted, over-endowed, short pseudo-human with a prehensile umbilical cord and a taste for coprophilia and body parts. It's all played for trashy laughs and campy horror,
but the pacing is dreadfully slow and the movie is full of long scenes that do nothing, and lots of juvenile warped humor that falls flat. There is some fun to be had with
the sheer trashy strangeness of it all, and the movie does have a bit of fun with Asian stereotypes, but it's too little and mostly overwhelmed by the rest.
Won Ton Baby!
A near-cult flick about a club-footed weirdo who owns land with a lake which business men and the town want to take over. He lovingly keeps worms as pets, naming each one,
singing to them and building them homes, he plays music to his foot, and is visited and harrassed by various strange city folk, students and dead fishermen.
He starts feeding them worms and turning them into beeping worm-humans that excrete whipped cream and crawl after women. Several throwaway weird scenes,
shlocky acting and weird characters would make this entertaining if it weren't so terrible in general. Features close-up worm chewing.
Worm Eaters, The
Dull and overlong experimental movie that dives into the mind of a very pathetic, lonely and schizophrenic man who talks to pornographic mags,
indulges in racist rants, wanders around the woods, maintains a biology hobby, collects dead animals and parts in jars, and develops a sexual
relationship with the upper part of a mannequin. Sounds and images are cut together to make the experience, using images of animals parts, the
female body, lactating breasts, etc, all of which slowly get more deformed and bizarre as mutating flesh, a head that is part chicken, a growing
mutation connected to a woman through an umbilical cord, bleeding breasts etc. A particularly dark scene mixes colors, disturbing visions and
sound as the man tries to cut into a nasty cyst on his arm. A repetitive, long and slow movie studying a character that only deserves 3 minutes tops.
A truly abysmal home-made splatter movie about (let's see if I can get this right): A guy who chops up a horse belonging to a shoe repairman who
tortures people for a living. The horse infects him with a toxin that makes him defecate and vomit nastily, and then infects a field of yeast
(what?) which catches the attention of a Nazi who plans to kill the world by selling the toxin in wine bottles. The wine bottles then come alive
and attack the locals while random characters sing and blow each other's heads off, eat each other's flesh to the bone, slash, cut, rip and blow
off each other's body parts until Mary Poppins comes to save the day. If this sounds like insane fun, think again. The horrible acting, production
values and annoying voice-overs balance out the fun.
Avant-garde movie that explores the relationship, or equivalence between humans and animals. There is no narrative, only a series of artistic performances,
provocative statements and bizarre dialogue, all touching on the theme. A cabaret singer performs in Noah's Ark to an audience in animal costumes, and then
goes on the prowl through the city and zoo. People's roles and titles are interchangeable, and human relationships with each other and society are compared to
animals through their basic impulses. People crawl like cats, respond mechanically to situations, driven by simple motives, they lust, they sing, discuss
nudity, seduction and murder as meaningless options chosen indifferently by impulses, and they talk through dehumanized mechanical voice-boxes, all leading to
an encounter with the 'zoo manager'. The movie asks whether human behaviour is just training, what law and order truly means, and whether even Mozart was
an animal. Unfortunately, it only touches these topics and doesn't explore them. For arthouse purists that prefer their movies highly experimental,
intellectually unrewarding, and without narrative.